Mother in need of help!!!!

I have been reading books, talking to my therapist and talking to my sons therapist and teacher.  I do not know what to do with him anymore.  He has been hitting, lying, stealing, putting himself in dangerous situations.  I can't even put him on time out because he will not sit and if I try to keep putting him back he turns it into a superhero game with me as the bad guy.  Tonight again I had to hold him in my lap and try to calm him down.  He hit me and elbowed me in the face trying to get away from me.  I cannot hold him all night.  Then I tried to ignore him and not reward his behavior with a reaction, but then he started hitting me and pinching me to get to me.  I was able to stay calm and told him to stop or there would be no bedtime snack, but he went without his bedtime snack and had another blow up.  I am so depressed, hopeless, afraid, angry, anxious,frustrated, helpless, just so many things that I just cannot deal with.  I love him so much but what can I do for him?  I also have back problems and I have been in so much pain from trying to hold him through a struggle that I just want to take more pain meds then I am perscribed.  I will not, I know that would not help, but I want to.  His birthday is tuesday and I am dreading it.  Is he ganna be good or bad?  Do I take away his birthday presents if he is bad or do something else?  I just don't know anymore.  Please someone give me some advise and words of encouragement to get me through this without cutting or something else.  I haven't cut in years but I really want to right now to the point that I have tried the ice cube and the rubberband.  Please help  


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[hero65]

try reasoning with him try explaining wrong from right if you have to use the God argument
if that doesn't work you just have to be more hard on him ... try taking away stuff anything that he likes toys, tv time, anything that you think will make him listen to you
and if that doesn't work you have to spank him or whatever because if he's putting his life at risk it's not a game anymore ... and don't be those moms who want their boy to be their best friend even if he hates you for a while when he grows up and he's healthy and has a good life he will thank you
good luck

[RockRose]

Getting an overactive child to sit still - if you are incapable of making him do it due to pain - isn't going to work.

Also,  taking his toys away after  his birthday party if you feel like he didn't behave is really revenge, not discipline,  and is unlikely to cause any better behavior.

When he starts to get out of control,  best to make him MOVE.  Not punitively - not like a death march - but as a way to vent.  You can get a twin mattress and put it on the floor (better to get a trampoline,  but a mattress will do) and put a big mirror up and let him bounce and bounce and make angry or funny faces.  He can do 10 somersaults,  or run run run long jump as far as you can.  

There's a great raffi song - Shake my Sillies Out - that would be perfect for him.  He's got pent up energy,  he knows you can't make him sit still,  and he needs a vent.  Having lots of vigorous physical activity that's fun for him will help a lot.