I have a son who is going to be 5 years old in just a few months. We have been trying to potty train him for over a year. In the first say he got peeing in the potty. We have tried to keep him in underwear as much as possible but life does get in the way; long road trips, long shopping days, ect. He has had a few poop accidents in his underwear. But for the most part be will hold it all day long. I change him out of a diaper in the morning and he wears underwear to school and at home all day. Then before he goes to bed I put another pullup on him. THe next morning it's full of poop.
Basically if he is pullups he will just go without telling us anything, (he is not particularlly verbal) but in underwear he will hold the poop in. We have tried rewarding him. But i am just not sure he knows what he is doing when he poops or what we want him to poop in the potty. Please help. I have a very dedicated husband but he is as clueless as I am and I am isolated because I don't have any friends or family to turn to.
There's a lot here that you haven't said - it sounds like he has some pretty significant delays. Have you asked his pediatrician about this? If he doesn't understand that you want him to use the toilet, and if he's not verbal, it sounds like you could use some help from other parents/professionals who work with children with delays.
I put my dd to sleep in underwear but leave the potty next to her bed. When she needs to go she gets out of bed and goes.
Perhaps this system can work for you. This way he learns to use the potty independently.
My daughter will be three in November and we just got through 6 months of this similar situation. I finally got fed up with buying pull-ups- as well felt like it made it "OK" to her since it was underwear sometimes and pull-ups others. There were a lot of messes and it wasn't fun but what I initially did was when she had an accident I had her stand in time out (we use the nose to the wall) I usually got a quick bath ready then had her remove her 'yucky' clothes herself. It took a few days but just asking every 5 minutes (it seemed) and taking her in for numerous potty breaks, even if she didn't have to go, got her in the routine and now I'm home free! Well that is until my now 2 month old reaches that point! Good luck and I hope this helps. Another suggestion I did with my son was took him to pick out his own big boy underwear, maybe your son would enjoy that and spark more interest for him!
I have made a appointment with my son's doctor but they have a serious back log and won't be able to see her until late this month. I have asked his pre-school teachers but they have no answers for me. I feel so helpless, I am a first time mom and want to help my son. Its just unclear how.
That seems like a great idea but I am afraid that my son would play with his bowels. He has a issues before taking off his diaper in the middle of the night and doing such a thing. So I think we will keep looking but i'm glad that this technique worked for you.
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