Parenting Toddlers (1-5) Community
my daughter is out of control..lol
About This Community:

This patient support community is for discussions relating to the challenges of parenting toddlers (age 1-5), including physical, speech, sensory, cognitive and emotional development, choosing a daycare/nanny, games & activities, and toilet training.

Font Size:
A
A
A
Background:
Blank
Blank
Blank
Blank Blank

my daughter is out of control..lol

My bby grl who is 2 yrs old is just wild and dont seem to wantvto listen to me at all. Im trying to teach my bby wqts right and wrong but dnt want too and if she wants something shell scream at da top of her lungs to get watever it is she wants. i try to b patient but da screaming n da crying is just to much n its harder for me if im 15 wks pregnant. so tired n dnt kno hw to get her 2 b a lil angel.. its just dat her father lets her fo watever she wants n it gets me upset.
4 Comments Post a Comment
Blank
377493_tn?1356505749
I have a 2 year old as well, and I understand what you mean.  However, I don't think there is much hope of them being little angels...lol.  Not in my experience or that of my son's friends moms.  

The thing to remember is that they do not yet have control of their emotions.  So, they act out, scream when they don't get their way, etc. because they just don't really know any other way yet to express themselves.  I have gotten some really helpful info from other moms that has worked well for me, so I'll share it with you.

When my son screams, screeches or yells, he does not get what he wants.  I calmly tell him...mommy cannot understand you when you scream.  When you are ready to calm down and tell me what you want, then we can talk about it.  And when the answer is no, I explain why.  He asks for chocolate and it's "no honey, we are having lunch shortly, chocolate is a treat for afterward" or "no honey, you had one earlier, and you can't have too many, I'm sorry".  I also say alot of things like "I know, it's hard to understand that we can't always have what we want, I know your frustrated.....or sad.....or mad.....or whatever is appropriate.  The key is to stay calm, respond positively to the good behavior and not respond to the negative, but still be empathetic to them.  They are afterall only 2.  

Now, trust me, none of this has made my child a perfectly behaved little boy.  But I already know that he won't be - he's going to test boundaries, have tantrums, etc.  The key is teaching them that that does not work and it takes time and a whole lot of patience.

You need to get dad on the same page as you.  My husband and I work really hard at being consistent and it helps a great deal.  Discuss it with him out of childs earshot, or after she has gone to bed.  Talk about how to handle things so that you are both on the same page, or she will quickly learn that if one says no, the other will say yes, etc.  Personally, I don't think that is a good thing.

Hope this helps a bit, and best of luck.
Blank
Avatar_f_tn
Thank you for da tips. but da prblm im having is how to get thru to her cus ive tried n she b screaming on da top of her lungs o cry. shes at a stage where im still trying to teach her o get her to tlk. i feel like im behind on dat n need to get crackin.. n as for her dad being in da picture i wont even wanna go there cus there is no tlking to dat man he does wat he wants o ill hear shes my daughter too. so watever wrk ive done its like a waste of time..
Blank
377493_tn?1356505749
Well, for sure your job is going to be much tougher if dad isn't on the same page as you.  That's too bad as really, he is only reinforcing that screaming and negative behavior gets her what she wants.  

Do what you can.  One of the things that has also worked for my son is time outs.  I know it doesn't work for every child, but worked well for mine.  So, when he starts screaming, I calmly tell him he has to the count of three to calm down.  I slowly count, then without another word walk him (or carry him) to his room.  I shut the door and walk away for about 2 minutes.  That works well too.  Removing the audience I think.

Also, if he does this when we are out, I warn him that if does not stop, we are leaving.  And we leave if he doesn't stop.  It's important to follow through with what you say you will do.  Now all I have to do is warn, and that usually works.

Last thought.....is there a particular time when she does this?  I know with my son if he is overtired it's very difficult to calm him down.  Most kids this age need about 12 hours in a 24 hour period....that can be a combination of nap and overnight sleep.

If she learns screaming gets her her way, it's pretty tough.  I hope you can get through to dad.
Blank
Avatar_f_tn
My lil one is active all day til late at nite.. im even having a hrd time getting her to bed at a right time.. yes it wud b nice to get thru to him but hes not no ordinary man dats easy to get along wit.. but since hes not in da picture. mayb this will b my opportunity to get her bck to wat it was like b4 she turned 2 cus she was nver like this.. she only changes whenever shes around him n it sux cus when hes around its like my daughter chooses him over me when he dnt do crap to help raise r daughter.. sry for dat.
Blank
Post a Comment
To
Blank
Weight Tracker
Weight Tracker
Start Tracking Now
Parenting Toddlers (1-5) Community Resources
RSS Expert Activity
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
The 3 Essentials to Ending Emotiona...
Sep 18 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
Control Emotional Eating with this ...
Sep 04 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
Emotional Eating Control: How to St...
Aug 28 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank