ok, so im 16 years old i know its something wrong with me wating a baby but i kno i will be able to take care of him/her i know people are going to say u need to live ur life or finish high school. i understand but i still can do all of those things i can even go to college ..(i did research) i feel that since i lost my mom and pa i want a child. maybe my motherly instincts are coming early i just feel that its something wrong with that and want to know what it is before i actually go through with it.
Well, first off, there is nothing wrong with you. Wanting to have a baby is a very natural thing. I think many young women feel that way.
Here are some things to think about first though.
Yes, you can go to college. However, during classes, someone is going to have to take care of your child. I don't know how much daycare costs in other cities, but where I live it's about $900 to $1000 per month. On top of that, you need rent, food, transportation, diapers, baby clothes, toys, the list goes on and on. It is a very expensive thing to do. Trust me, I have an 11 month old and it's not cheap at all. There is also baby furniture, things like soap and shampoo (they can't use the same things we do). So, I would suggest that before you get pregnant, you have this stuff sorted out. Yes, there is social assistance, but on it you would just barely make ends meet.
You also need to know that babies are an awful lot of hard work. They are up several times during the night in the beginning (mine was until he was 8 months old). Your tired all the time. So, going to college, plus working and taking care of a baby would be exhausting. My husband has a cousin who is 18 now with a 1 year old. She is going to college and her and her boyfriend support their child. She loves that little boy dearly, but will be the first to tell you that she wishes she would have waited. At least until she finished college.
Her day goes something like this...
She is up at 5am. She gets herself and her son dressed, breakfast fed. She then drops him at his sitters around 7. She spends the day at school, then an hour or two with him, then off to her part time job. She gets home around 10 or so, (baby is already asleep), studies, goes to bed and gets up to do it all over again. Her sitter and her mother see way more of her son then she does. Weekends she is studying as well, so she balances that with her part time job and spending time with her son.
Try to actually picture that because it is reality for many young moms.
Basically, what I am saying is that loving your child is the easy part. Unfortunately it is not enough. Maybe just slow down a bit. Get yourself an education, a decent job and hopefully a good, loving and involved partner. You have so much time. Why cram everything in all at once?
There is nothing wrong wanting to be a mother, but there is also nothing wrong with waiting.
I'm 21, mother to an 11 month old boy and 12 weeks pregnant.
I also have two step-children. I love them all but, I won't make out that it's easy.
My husband is a great help, but even with him assisting, I can't imagine having had my son any earlier than I did.
Not only do you have to look after your child, you have to look after yourself and sometimes the two of those don't always go hand in hand, especially if you have studies and a home to look after.
I'm not saying you shouldn't do it, no doubt you will be an amazing mother one day...
But I do think you should have a good think about it and maybe wait awhile.
My husband and I decided that before trying for a baby we would make sure we had everything we would need to raise them - newborn nappies, cot, rocker, pram, bottles, unisex clothing etc to ensure that our child wouldn't go without.
Nine months may seem like enough time to gather everything you will need for a child, but those nine months go so fast and baby furniture etc isn't cheap.
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