Class clown

[holycow1968]

My 9 year old son is constantly getting into trouble for silly things such as not standing in line appropriately, going to the bathroom too often, getting out of his chair at lunch too many times, etc. How do I help him to understand that he has to take responsibility for his own actions and stop blaming others (teachers, principal, other students) for the predicaments he finds himself in?

[Shadowweaver]

You sound like an activist for anarchy here.  In school as in society there are rules and guidelines that need to be followed for the purpose of maintaining order and progression of thought and purpose.  There is a quote, though I don't remember who first said it, that states in order for someone to have absolute freedom, someone else but be in absolute slavery.  The freedoms that we have we have by the utilization of self-control and by following the rules and guidelines of society.  We first learn to do this in school where we are required to follow the rules of the school...and stay in the appropriate line.  An inability to do that can range in severity to everything from ADD where they simply loose their focus or forget they are in line to anti-social psychotic behavior where they actively seek out to hurt others and can't conform to the rules of society.  Stating that rules are not needed is to state that you feel the rest of the world should be enslaved to you which in an of itself is anti-social behavior.  Just something to think about.

[surprisebaby]

what exactly are you saying....???  
YES there is an appropriate line at school.  Can't imagine watching 100s of children just run around with no rules or consequences.  They learn to sit in their chairs all day long, to LEARN things...you know...to help them in the real world....
Yes, kids need to be kids, but there is a time and a place for it.  My ds was the class clown a couple of years ago...many phone calls from the teacher.  We worked through it, explained how inappropriate some things were ... luckily, he listened and decided to buckle down and get some work done!  Good luck to you

[margypops]

Oh my goodness is there now an 'appropiate' line and for heavens sake dont give your kid too many drinks in case they ever have to pee too much,why dont we make them sit in their chairs all day long , that'll keep them out of the way wont It

[jdtm]

Often children who use these methods of diversion are trying "to cover up" that they are unable to do the class work.  Have you discussed this possibility with his teacher?

[Shadowweaver]

My daughter use to do the same thing so I finally started telling her that the teacher, principal, etc, did not physically grab her legs and make them move to move her in line, etc.  It took about a year before I got her to understand that when she did those things that no one made her, but that she made the choice.  You may want to try that.  Hope it helps.