I think I have PPD. Tell me if this sounds like PPD.. lately I just feel like I HATE myself. I hate everything about me.. my body, my personality (or lack there of), even my own thoughts. I don't want to see anyone. I get anxious and nervous when I'm around others. My fiance's sister is coming to stay with us and I'm dreading it eventho I really like her. But I don't have a loss of energy, I still clean the house and go on walks. I haven't thought about suicide or anything like that. I just feel so insecure and utter hatred for myself. I love Draeven and I'm glad he's in my life now but I wish I could feel good about myself. I just want to hide so I don't have to interact with anyone and so no one will see how ugly I am. I feel manly.. I dont think I look very graceful or pretty. I don't like feeling this way. Does this sound like PPD?
You are probably going to hate this, but it sounds like hormones. Try to take some time for yourself like go to the gym for 1/2 hour, go get a pedicure, a massage, get your hair done. do stuff that makes you feel good. Believe me girl, there's nothing manly about you, you just had a baby, you are ALL WOMAN. You have just gone through a HUGE change in your life both physically and emotional and its going to take some adjustment before you get back into being you again. If this feeling escalates to a point that you fear for both yourself and your child, please seek help otherwise, I'm sure that taking a little effort to treat yourself a little more you'll start feeling better.
I'm not a mother but I'm sure that it is overwhelming to all of a sudden feel like you have to cater every need to another being both physically and emotionally, and you are giving your 100% but you are probably feeling like you are not getting 100% back, so treat yourself to something nice and demand it if its not given to you!
To me those sound like classic signs of PPD. PPD IS caused (in most cases) by the hormonal roller coaster ride postpartum women are on. I would seriously talk to your ob or GP about this. You need to find a course of treatment now before it gets out of hand. I don't know if you are BF'ing or not but there IS a medication (if you choose that route) that is safe while BF'ing. I believe it's Zoloft. Not everyone experiences all symptoms of depression. Just becuase you don't have the lack of energy does not mean it isn't PPD. All the thoughts you expressed are signs of depression. Perhaps your OB or GP can get you into see a counselor first to see if that helps...then if that doesn't work, try medication. Seriously, tho, I would talk to your doctor about this. Depression in ANY form...be it PPD or other wise is not something to take lightly.
I am sorry you are feeling this way, but I would have to agree with LosingMyMind that it does sound like PPD, but I also think Mumita has a good point when she says try and make some time for YOU to do girly things. I would schedule and appt. w/ your Dr. though. LOSINGMY is right that there are options for medications while your hormones are regulating..
I feel strongly that once my son is born, I will likely suffer from PPD as well.. I have a history of depression.. Chin up and you are BEAUTIFUL!! NOT manly... BEAUTIFUL!! YOU HEAR ME??? =P
aww thanks so much ladies. I'm going to schedule an appointment with a counselor to talk more about it and see what my all options are. It feels good getting some validation that this is a serious problem I should seek help for. I'm one step closer to feeling better. I'll try to keep it together until then
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