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naming the baby --- issues
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naming the baby --- issues

ok this is getting to me big time...at first i thought DF was kidding by wanting our daughter to be named mary jayne but now im getting that he's not kidding....i dont like that name at all and his stubborn butt is getting mad about it...

i refuse to name my child this...it has nothing to do with my life nor do i want her associated with it in anyway...he says its because his grandmothers name was mary but i just dont like the name for my daughter

ugh...what do i do...is there any other form of mary out there that maybe i could suggest instead

i cant believe out of all the names out there he chooses this one!!!!! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
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21 Comments Post a Comment
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202436_tn?1326477933
Well when it comes right down to it YOU are the one who fills out the name papers ;)  

What about Maria, Marie?  What about Mary as a middle name?  

Dont' feel bad, DH and I still can't agree on names either.  I think his names are boring and overused and he doesn't like the names i do, i think just to spite me lol.  

Mary Jayne reminds me of candy and shoes.  Not little girls.
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1123420_tn?1350564758
im sorry but mary jane reminds me of weed.. i wouldnt name my daughter that either so i dont blame you
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Avatar_f_tn
I know people named Mary Katherine, Mary margaret, Mary beth, and  Mary Frances
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202436_tn?1326477933
Yeah I forgot the weed thing too LOL

Tell him he's asking for your child to have a lifetime of being picked on and made fun of.
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Avatar_f_tn
my dh and i fought for 6 months about names. even girl names after we found out both were boys.

he INSISTED on russian names. (he's full blooded russian...i am not...i'm irish, german, hungarian and english) i told him no. if he was going to insist on a russian name then i was going to research names for my heritages...and i did. we did agree we wanted names that nobody else in our family had. two of the names we found that we both actually like were brett and eli....guess what our kids names are. lol.
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796506_tn?1370191905
Well as you know my mom's name is Mary Anne and I am naming my daughter Marley Anne Jade (Marley is another form of Mary). Maren, Marilyn, Maura, Molly and Maria are a few other forms. I think your DH needs to realize that kids can be cruel and she will eventually get picked on and that can cause emotional scars. Everyone has a right to name their own children (I really picked out the name Marley and my husband just seemed to fall right into it too) whatever they want but I think that the child's well being should be considered.
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317019_tn?1327343013
thanks ladies for your input...i just dont like the name Mary as the first name of my daughter...i respect that he wants to name our daughter after his deceased grandmother but im trying to figure out how to make us both happy...i love my grandmother very much but i wouldnt name my daughter joyce....i felt like he was taking it personal i hurt his feelings when i told him i dont want that name

i thought our deal was we wont name her after any past flings (which is really making it extra hard to name her) and he was supposed to choose names, we pick 3 names we both agree on and then he chooses the 1 name when she is born....i thought it was more than fair

the other thing i have in mind is that I am in grad school going to become a teacher and i just dont think i would have respect of other parents if my daughter was named mary jayne....ugh

we havent brought up names since earlier....i really hope next time he doesnt get pissy because i say no to mary
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1308572_tn?1279278223
i agree its hard to come up with names that both parents like. my husband and i found two names finally that we agreed on..he wanted Hunter and I wanted Parker. We put both names on a piece of paper folded them up and put in a hat...I let him draw one and Parker it was...As far as cute names that are related to Mary....another idea is always Marisyn (unique??) Not sure hun...but good luck!
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1035252_tn?1371343440
Well maybe I'm a complete dork but when I hear Mary Jane I always think of spiderman. I kinda like it because of that, but I'm one of those people who can't do "normal" names...my kids are Kahlan and Grey, lol.
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1123420_tn?1350564758
My middle name is Joyce lol.. its my grandmothers first name too.. lol sorry i just thought that was funny, but id be pretty mad if it was my first name lol.. but I think it goes good for a middle name and it def fits me.. well it kinda has to its been my name for 20 years lol
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376739_tn?1317669990
Ask him if he wants to associate weed/drugs with his sweet, innocent baby. He might rethink it.
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1244180_tn?1325902711
I think of weed lol.... Tell him too bad and you won't name her that and remind him that your the one that gets to fill out the birth certificate lol. Men are so stubborn there were lots of fighting over names for my son but in the end I won and I named him Hayden. Tell him that your the one that has to be pregnant for nine months and you should have some kind of sonority.
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1123420_tn?1350564758
Me and Df argued for along time about our sons name.  I wanted the name Cole before I was pregnant. I picked out Cole and Kylee when we first started talking about having a baby. he agreed with Kylee immediatly, but wasnt sure about Cole, cause it was his first sons middle name that had passed away at birth 2 years ago with his ex.  But he finally grew to like it and the idea of carrying on his name.. Now that Our son is here, I know Df Loves his name and I got my way in the end!! lol
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505857_tn?1329685117
you'll probably find she might get called MJ if you name her Mary Jane but i'm not sure on this as my partners mother and sister are both Mary i do think it's an old fashioned name though
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1303813_tn?1303162962
If you dont like him tell him.... What about Mary Mae? Everyone I seem to know who is called Mary seems to be a right Pain in the backside haha. But Thats just me, What about Millie? Why not double barrel the name...
Mary is a very old Fashion name and it reminds me of Spider man because she is called Mary-Jane. But I dont like the name Mary either way.

Talk to your partner and say you understand his wish to use the name as a first name but its your baby too and your Daughter has to live with it forever and you just dont like it as a first Name and suggest some others or ask his Grandmothers middle name and use that instead??

Good Luck xx
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1303813_tn?1303162962
Another thing is we are using names to carry down, my boyf wanted to call our child if it was a boy John Jr I said NO! So we are calling it Harry-John Stephen as the name John Stephen or Stephen John has been passed down in his family for YEARS! and Harry IS out of Spiderman because I DONT like Peter or Tony (Tony stark from Iron Man) NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!! Plus if we have a girl she is going to be Called Peyton-Jane as I want my Middle name passed down AND Peyton is a boys name Normally. haha.

And down the line if we have more we have names Like Freya-Jay and Max Alexander and things like that. Haha.

Just explain you Dont like it.


x
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1102290_tn?1278503553
My first husband and I fought over names - but when it came down to it... I explained that I would give him the choice of the options I liked with some thought of his ideas.... When it came down to it - after the whole pregnancy - he did not fight me on it as he knew I deserved to name the baby - after all that we go through it is the nicest thing to do.... with this one - I let my new DH pick the name - I guided him but I let him pick... It is not my favorite because it is sooo popular - but it is his first and probably last child - so why not... you can always pull the .... let me name this baby and you can name the next.... and fight about it when the next one comes!  Good Luck - and yes... I knew a few Mary Jane's - and everyone associates it with weed growing up but it is a pretty name and is very traditional...ask him what he thinks her nick name should be - there are not many with this one... maybe the lack of choices for that may sway him as well.
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317019_tn?1327343013
thanks everybody for your input....i just dont like plain names and im kinda sad that he is so bent on naming her mary....

i have dropped the naming on the baby since his little temper fit yesterday but this baby is coming in 3 months-ish and we need to figure this out...DF can be very stubborn when he doesnt get his way but i will not name my daughter mary...i really wanted to call her alyssa but then just found out DF had a relationship with an alyssa and that is part of our agreement...argh...is there anybody he hasnt been with :(

im worried this baby will not have a name
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1303813_tn?1303162962
Why not put a numerous amount of names into a hat.... But secretly DONT put Mary in there :) and pick out two and this could be her first and middle name....

What About Millie Louise, Or Mae? if he likes Mary, compramise say she can be called Mary on her Birth cert BUT at home she gets called Mae, but her real name is Mary? or something

Just dont tell him Mary isnt in the Hat :)


What About Millie Louise, Or Mae? if he likes Mary, compramise say she can be called Mary on her Birth cert BUT at home she gets called Mae, but her real name is Mary? or something

x
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404138_tn?1308945256
Put your foot down, your willing to compromise, he needs to compromise with you ...... You are the one carrying her for 9mos and the one that has to go through the labor pain....not him, so you do have a little bit more say than he does. Write 3 names down that you really really like & tell him on a scale of 1-10 ( 1 hating it and 10 loving it that Mary is a ZERO, but that you'd be willing to switch it up or make it a middle name, he has to be willing to compromise.  have him write down 3 names... throw out suggestions and work it out, hopefully he will see that your not backing down...and will learn that this his AND your baby

Im having the same exact problem...except im having a boy, so i feel ya!
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1169162_tn?1331235953
My DF and I initially had some heated discussions about names.  I was pretty clear that since the baby will have his last name, then I should get priority in choosing the first name, with the understanding that I would never chose a name he strongly disliked.  If he wanted his favorite first name, that would be fine, but then the baby would have my last name.  (I am not changing my last name even after we are married).  I do think that we should have a little more say in the first name as we have to carry the baby and give birth and since the last name is that of our partners.  Either way though, no child should have a name that either parent hates - that just seems unfair.    
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