Safe after first trimester??

[m3lanie]

I'm very frustrated and perhaps due to my raging hormones... pissed off about the ******** statements I've been raised around hearing about if you can get thru the first 3 months of your pregnancy without miscarrying you're out of the woods?? That's aload of hogwash from what I've been reading. I've been on pregnancy forums for a few weeks now and i've read many women miscarrying after the first trimester. How the hell does that happen??? I don't get it one friggen bit. I have about  4 more weeks to go til I am into my second trimester and how far my baby has developed by then is remarkable but why the hell would it abort then and not before when it's in fragile times? I am so damn nervous and as I said frustrated with all the conflicting information out there. Can anyone explain where the hell they came up with the idea you're safe after the first trimester? Maybe I am missing something somewhere.

I know most of you are rather knowledgable on the formation of life, perhaps my clueless mind can be educated on this subject. thanks :)  

[96744mom]

anything can happen in a pregnancy.....odds are if you get thru the 1st trimester everything will be fine but there are things that happen that no one can predict. what is certain, however, is that worrying about these unforseen complications is harmful to you. so knock it off! enjoy your pregnancy and don't worry about miscarrage unless you start to have bleeding and contractions!

[adgal]

Hey, sorry your so upset right now.  May I ask though that we please keep this forum G rated?  Thanks.

That being said, yes it is true that a miscarriage can happen after a first trimester.  Sadly there is no 100% guarantee with this whole process.  The reason so many of us are so happy when we make it through first trimester is that that is when the vast majority of miscarriages happen.  Most miscarriages are due to chromosonal abnormalities, and the body miscarries first trimester.  It is pretty rare to have it happen after that.  I am not sure why this makes you angry, but in all honesty, chances are you have nothing to worry about.  Good luck.

[m3lanie]

I never used a single word that warranted the concealed word above.

As I mentioned above, I'm pregnant and my hormones are out of my control and so I have an attitude that is 100 times magnified.

[m3lanie]

Yes you're right, I should stop worrying. I'll try and beat my hormones and calm down. Thanks for the reply, it makes sense that complications 'may' happen later thru self inflictions such as stress etc.

[40smama]

m3lanie - I hear your stress about everything.  Remember though a pregnancy that goes past the first trimester has a very, very high percentage (like 97%) of being born healthy.  There are those pregnancies that survive until the 2nd trimester that don't have a good outcome and you have to remember those of us who've suffered a 2nd trimester miscarriage are more likely to write about it on forums such as these.  

I remember reading about a very nice lady who lost her baby during the 2nd trimester on the fertility forum.  After reading her tragedy, I was terrified for my baby (i was still in my 1st trimester).  But here's the thing:  you can choose to live in terror/fear or you can live in the joy of being pregnant.  I think you'll be much happier and less stressed if you make the conscious decision to live in the joy of the moment and not worry so much about what could or more likely won't happen.

I hope this doesn't sound harsh - I mean it in the best of ways.  Stress isn't good for you or your baby but it sounds like things are going well for you.  I take it you've already heard the heartbeat?  The chances of m/c go way, way, way down after hearing that so you're in good hands.  

[YvetteY]

The majority of miscarriages will happen in the first trimester.   I don't know the percentage, but a lot of stuff can happen and generally it's due to a bad egg.   And yes some stuff does happen in the 2nd and 3rd trimester as well, but it's not nearly the same as or as high of a percentage as in the first.

In the 2nd trimester things that go wrong are generally issues with your body and reproductive organs, or the baby's organs are functionined properly.  For example your cervix can't sustain the pregnancy.

In the 3rd trimester could be things like a cord accident or just some freaky thing that goes wrong.

In general fetal demise before 20 weeks is called miscarriage and thereafter it's called stillborn.   And fetal demise (death) can happen anytime, but more often than not it happens in the first trimester.  

I've been worrying my entire pregnant, so far I'm almost 30 weeks and to be honest I will continue to worry about this pregnancy, until this baby is in my arms.  I know for fact many women can lose their baby at 36, 37 or 38 weeks.  It woudl kill me to go that far and lose the baby.  

ANd I'm not trying to scare you, just give you the facts.  Because honestly you are more safer as you prengnacy advances and it's very good and positive if you make it out of the first trimester.   I'd put worry in the back burner.  

[YvetteY]

Just wanted to let you know that i didn't read anything offensive in your post.   But maybe you can just type *****.     i think that constitutes a g-rating.  I cracked up when you got scolded for that.   There are people who like to type ghetto and I find that to be more irritating.   LIke wat da....   People are very supersenitive around here.  

Oh and i don't think i mentioned ....the reason they say first trimester is because the majority of failing pregnancies will happen during this time.   ANd a small percentage happen after that.   I don't think people actually will ever tell you that you are completely out of the woods...but as your pregnancy advances the chance for baby's survivial increases.

[SoCalTricia]

You know, reading this forum turned me into a basket case at the beginning of my pregnancy. BUT...I finally realized that these forums ARE NOT a unbiased sampling of pregnant women. Fertility/pregnancy forums are, by nature, full of women who have had or are having issues. The majority of women here have had past problems. Not all, but a LOT. So, don't based your feelings on what you read here or on any other forum. The fact is, the HUGE majority of pregnancies that make it past the first trimester are healthy. According to what I've read online, the miscarriage rate after 12 weeks is 3%. And the further along you get, that lower that number gets. Every week decreases your miscarriage rate.

Take a deep breath. Read these forums for entertainment/friendship purposes only. And take good care of yourself. :-)

Tricia

[m3lanie]

YvetteY and Tricia - Thank you, you're so wonderful. Reading your posts made me feel better and I laughed. Yea I was rather shocked at the response to my hormonal rage. I think the word I used was blood with a y at the end. I was happy to see that there are actually understanding people on here that can mold with my mood because I am sure we all have them since we're pregnant and I so need the stability of caring people. I did feel better reading your posts as i mentioned and thanks again. I definately can relax more now and still feel I have people who actually care for me to give me advice and make me feel better.