Aa
Ladies I need MAJOR support!
I just got my amnio results back. It's a boy. but also has tested positive for Down Syndrome %99.9 sure. I just got the call about 10 min. ago.
I'm dying inside right now, simply because it was my biggest fear to have a baby w d/s or autism. There's no way I'd ever abort, EVER. But how will my husband react? He doens't know.
The good things is we now have a little Tyler James on the way.
I'm dying inside right now, simply because it was my biggest fear to have a baby w d/s or autism. There's no way I'd ever abort, EVER. But how will my husband react? He doens't know.
The good things is we now have a little Tyler James on the way.
wow im so sad for you right now at least you guys have the boy you wanted..kids are great either way i dont know any d/s kids but im sure they will bring a smile to your face just as any child would..
Im thinking of you and your family after this devastating news. I hope and pray the results are wrong and you have a healthy little boy without Downs. Words cant describe how much we all are thinking of you and how we all are praying so hard for you. People say actions speak louder than words i disagree i think words are more intense and mean so much. Good luck and lets hope god is on your side
xx
xx
I wish you the best of luck. I would look for a support group ahead of time as they will help you know what to expect. I had a trisomy on one of my pregnancies that miscarried which brought all of your questions to the fore front. i was surprised when my ultra liberal husband told me he was against abortion unless the baby was suffering a terminal and painful condition. Those philosophy majors really can shock you. He reasoned that you could have a perfectly normal child and then some accident could occur and you would be in the same position. We had friends whose perfectly normal child developed a seizure disorder at 4 months that destroyed the language parts of his brain - he was also hardly able to move any of his limbs. He seems bright but it is very hard for him to communicate. There are no guarantees for anyone.
My own daughter almost died at three from Kawasaki's disease. She struggles a bit at school - but i barely blink an eye. She is happy and well adjusted and she is alive. We spent three weeks in the hospital - watching her waste away - I did not really care whether she was going to be a doctor or a lawyer. I was just afraid of losing her. I think it was Samuel Johnson In the end, the measure of a man is how well he treats those that he cannot expect gain from - so perhaps people with Down's Syndrome are the most human of us all.
My own daughter almost died at three from Kawasaki's disease. She struggles a bit at school - but i barely blink an eye. She is happy and well adjusted and she is alive. We spent three weeks in the hospital - watching her waste away - I did not really care whether she was going to be a doctor or a lawyer. I was just afraid of losing her. I think it was Samuel Johnson In the end, the measure of a man is how well he treats those that he cannot expect gain from - so perhaps people with Down's Syndrome are the most human of us all.
You are all so sweet, I cant believe the support I'm getting from all my boards. :)
this is all really giving me strength
this is all really giving me strength
Well we already talked about this and you know what I think.
I'm sure you baby boy will be fine, with or without the problem.
Like some of these ladies on here have said, some of them show they have it, but don't act it, and some of them don't show they have it but DO act it.
And then some people show both in and out.
And some get lucky and you can't even really tell.
I'll pray to the gods that your baby will be highly functional and a handsome lil fellah.
And also that he doesn't have your heart or skin problem.
But mother nature doesn't make mistakes.
And when your baby boy comes out the way he does, you will cherish and love that baby boy because even if he's not like everyone else, he's still one of nature's most beautiful creations and it won't matter if he's perfect once you hold him in your arms.
I believe that sometimes the fertility goddess makes some babies special and unique whenever she can because it's not everyday she finds a loving, caring and devoted mother like you who will take care of that baby no matter what.
I'll prolly end up having to take that test too here within the next month or so, and if I come out positive, then I come out positive.
Either way I will be blessed to even have a healthy baby!
Cuz atleast he/she will have all her arms and all her legs.
All his/her toes and fingers... etc.
I honestly think you will be okay with your Jr.
I'm sure you baby boy will be fine, with or without the problem.
Like some of these ladies on here have said, some of them show they have it, but don't act it, and some of them don't show they have it but DO act it.
And then some people show both in and out.
And some get lucky and you can't even really tell.
I'll pray to the gods that your baby will be highly functional and a handsome lil fellah.
And also that he doesn't have your heart or skin problem.
But mother nature doesn't make mistakes.
And when your baby boy comes out the way he does, you will cherish and love that baby boy because even if he's not like everyone else, he's still one of nature's most beautiful creations and it won't matter if he's perfect once you hold him in your arms.
I believe that sometimes the fertility goddess makes some babies special and unique whenever she can because it's not everyday she finds a loving, caring and devoted mother like you who will take care of that baby no matter what.
I'll prolly end up having to take that test too here within the next month or so, and if I come out positive, then I come out positive.
Either way I will be blessed to even have a healthy baby!
Cuz atleast he/she will have all her arms and all her legs.
All his/her toes and fingers... etc.
I honestly think you will be okay with your Jr.
As shasy03 stated, you sound like a very strong woman... I think it will be tough, but I bet you are going to be the best darn mom there is to your little Tyler James. Best of luck to you and your DH.
You will have a handsome little man! It is hard to have a child with special needs. I teach them at work...it's hard as hell. God would not give you something you can not handle. You seem to be a strong woman and as for DH he will accept it. My distant Uncle refuse to accept that he has a child with special needs...now he doesn't know what to do without him. Children are blessings.......your heart is big and you will do just fine. You will be in my prayers.
I can`t say I`m sorry, because every baby is a miracle. Don`t loose your faith please. I know it`s hard for you now but with time you will find strenght in your heart and you will be very very happy. I remember your post when you got pregnant and you was scared because of having that skin disease. You told us that doctors were more pesimistic about you and now you are a adult person with normal life. Think positive please, there are so much bad things in this world and Down`s sy is something we can deal. People with Down are much better than us, they love everyone and they are happy with their life.
Since I was seven years old I have had a neighbor with D/S and it has been the most wonderful experience of my life and I thank God for putting him in my life. With him I look at things so different. He's the sunshine in the room for many people. Him and I are both 21 now and I still have to "keep" him every now and then if his mom has to go out of town and it's so much fun. He graduated from high school. (starting from kindergarten). They would put him in the regular classes and special classes and he did GREAT...after he graduated he even found a job at a local school here helping in the cafeteria. He loved it. Anyways if you raise them like they're normal they will be normal. If you raise them like they do have a disability then that's how they'll act. They are VERY smart if you let them be. I know you'll do just fine!!
OMG you are making me cry. lol, So many sweet poems. I'm gonna put this on my myspace. :)
this website I came upon is Amazing...http://raisingjoey.com/
“The only disability in life is a bad attitude.” -Scott Hamilton
My Perfect Child
As my children were born,
I wanted them to be perfect.
When they were babies,
I wanted them to smile and be content playing with their toys.
I wanted them to be happy and to laugh continually
instead of crying and being demanding.
I wanted them to see the beautiful side of life.
As they grew older,
I wanted them to be giving instead of selfish.
I wanted them to skip the terrible twos.
I wanted them to stay innocent forever.
As they became teen-agers,
I wanted them to be obedient and not rebellious, mannerly and not mouthy.
I wanted them to be full of love, gentle and kind-hearted.
“Oh, God, give me a child like this” was often my prayer.
One day He did. Some call him handicapped… I call him Perfect!
“The only disability in life is a bad attitude.” -Scott Hamilton
My Perfect Child
As my children were born,
I wanted them to be perfect.
When they were babies,
I wanted them to smile and be content playing with their toys.
I wanted them to be happy and to laugh continually
instead of crying and being demanding.
I wanted them to see the beautiful side of life.
As they grew older,
I wanted them to be giving instead of selfish.
I wanted them to skip the terrible twos.
I wanted them to stay innocent forever.
As they became teen-agers,
I wanted them to be obedient and not rebellious, mannerly and not mouthy.
I wanted them to be full of love, gentle and kind-hearted.
“Oh, God, give me a child like this” was often my prayer.
One day He did. Some call him handicapped… I call him Perfect!
I wish you all the best for the future.You seem a very strong and compassionate person.I pray that there are no heart problems so your son will live a very long and fruitful life. Having you as his mother I am sure he will be given so much love and he will return that to you making you feel that you are blessed. I know a couple who were trying for 10 yrs and they have a down syndrome baby.As a family they are as happy as anyone I know.
Hi darling.. I just want to say be strong through this time. Be happy too.. You are going to have a beautiful son that you are going to love unbelievably!! I know its hard to think of everything that is to come. But you will not think of any of it when your holding him in your arms or when your husband is gazing in his eyes.. You will do great!! you have lots of help (your mom said she'd help through it all) She will!! :)
pmperez~ because I was already having an amnio to diagnose the baby's skin problem if he has it, I didn't get the blood screen.
I don't plan on putting any boundaries on my baby, if he wants college later on, he'll get it! I'm makeing it very clear to DH that the only way he'll be limited is if WE do that limiting and we sure as heck shouldn't start before he's born.
and I agree with dealing with what god gives you, I personally believe he won't give you more than you can handle.. I FIRMLY believe that. So even if it feels like my worlds closing, it isn't.
sweetangel7~ I think that we WILL be able to handle this baby. the fear for me comes in wondering if our other babies will have it.
I don't plan on putting any boundaries on my baby, if he wants college later on, he'll get it! I'm makeing it very clear to DH that the only way he'll be limited is if WE do that limiting and we sure as heck shouldn't start before he's born.
and I agree with dealing with what god gives you, I personally believe he won't give you more than you can handle.. I FIRMLY believe that. So even if it feels like my worlds closing, it isn't.
sweetangel7~ I think that we WILL be able to handle this baby. the fear for me comes in wondering if our other babies will have it.
My mother works with downs, mr, autism, etc. and she says that often times she wishes that these children could be blessed with parents who could take care of them...maybe God or some higher power knew that you could take care of this kind of child. I work at a school and there is a poem about downs babies...it is like a prayer from them to their parents...you need to read it...maybe google...I'll try to get a copy when I'm at work and send it to you. Hugs and prayers!
I think that things are as hard as you make them, I already know the risks of me having a downs baby, here where I live they do some kind of screening where you dont have to do the amnio, I dont think I would even if they did...Ive been trying and wanting to get pregnant so long that I'll deal with whatever God gives me...Im not a SUPER religious person I am just a realistic person I hope out things turn out good for you either way....also there is so much help out there for down's baby's now, my cousins baby is I think a year and she already has a occupational therapist coming to help push her along...she is an extremely happy baby too
PMPEREZ , your response is VERY inspiring. I hope this baby is high functioning.
well.... not even sure whether to congratulate you first for fining out the sex or saying sorry about the downs results. My thoughts are with you and the baby boy.. and I am sure whether it turns to be with downs or without you would love him sooo much.... you sound very strong and I admire you for this.... remain strong and be thankful to the baby that you are carrying inside you regardless... I have never came a cross or heard of any parents having more than 1 downs child.... I am sure this would the case for you to thats if it turns with downs....
My sister has downs and she is fine she just has the features, also my cousin has a down's baby and she is really fine, she was a little behind other baby's in holding her head up and stuff like that but I dont think it will be anything you cant adjust to if he really is born with it....Noone wants that offcourse BUT sometimes I think God makes special people to take care of special babies.
I actually saw a map of HIS chromosomes today at the counsellors office, he has 3 copies of the # 21 chromosome. def. D/S. I'm gonna post a pic of his chromosome report on my page.
:( But We are trying to look at the bright side of things until we hear if the baby has my skin problem and any heart problems or not.
But I did have a VERY low chance, like 1/1700 or more, but after this baby, it's 1/100 with any other children.
She said it's very rare for a mom to have more than 1 child with down syndrome. and in a few weeks we are getting a heart test for the baby to be sure his heart is healthy since about %40 of these babies have heart problems. and my whole family knows.
I'm now officially considered HIGH RISK. At 24 weeks they're gonna do a echocardiogram(sp?) to check for heart defects, and at 29w they're gonna have me in 2X a week to check for stress on the baby.
My husband is looking at it this way~ We played russian roulette with 1 bullet already in the gun (my skin problem) then got shot with a second bullet we didn't know was in there. We're waiting to see if the next one comes out too.
How I see it~ At least we've survived that first shot.
:( But We are trying to look at the bright side of things until we hear if the baby has my skin problem and any heart problems or not.
But I did have a VERY low chance, like 1/1700 or more, but after this baby, it's 1/100 with any other children.
She said it's very rare for a mom to have more than 1 child with down syndrome. and in a few weeks we are getting a heart test for the baby to be sure his heart is healthy since about %40 of these babies have heart problems. and my whole family knows.
I'm now officially considered HIGH RISK. At 24 weeks they're gonna do a echocardiogram(sp?) to check for heart defects, and at 29w they're gonna have me in 2X a week to check for stress on the baby.
My husband is looking at it this way~ We played russian roulette with 1 bullet already in the gun (my skin problem) then got shot with a second bullet we didn't know was in there. We're waiting to see if the next one comes out too.
How I see it~ At least we've survived that first shot.
I'm so sorry girl! But, you know your baby will be loved 10xxxx more now!!!
I bet he will be precious and you'll fall in love with him as soon as you see him.
I also believe inside he'll be soo very smart and you'll be so proud.
Chin up lil lady =] Gotta stay strong for ur baby and ur family.. But also yourself!! =]
I bet he will be precious and you'll fall in love with him as soon as you see him.
I also believe inside he'll be soo very smart and you'll be so proud.
Chin up lil lady =] Gotta stay strong for ur baby and ur family.. But also yourself!! =]
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