oops new post

[SillyRenee]

I didn't realize my post wouldn't open.  Just a little update and favor to ask of you guys...The update is I was confirmed with CINII (precancerous cells) with unclear margins from my LEEP and I am just to keep an eye on it with serial paps.  Because I haven't had a period since April and this doctor doesn't seem to care I am switching to a new doctor and seeing him next week.  He is also a infertility specialist.  I hope to start Clomid next month as I feel my chances of actually having a baby are getting lower as the months pass by.  It has been nothing but doctors and tests for the past year.  My favor to ask of all you wonderful ladies is to please just keep me somewhere in your thoughts or prayers.  I am emotionally drained from the years events thus far and am just hoping I can actually conceive and carry a baby to term.  I hope you all are doing well :)

[JoyRenee]

Wow, that is a high statistic!

Well, I'm praying you get pregnant soon!~

[SillyRenee]

Yes! Please don't put it off.  In a year's time for me I went from a normal pap smear to CINII which is the second of three levels of precancerous cells, all in a years time!

[smjmekg]

Thanks for putting out that information, I didn't know it was such a high percent. I'm required to have a yearly with the military, but never had one before I joined at 20. That is very scary...I'm really glad you mentioned it though, I'm due for another in Aug or Sept. I forgot which I had it in last year, but I'll probably set up an appointment after AF is done.

[SillyRenee]

I am glad you asked :)

When I had my LEEP done he was dead set on taking as little out as possible because of the fact that I didn't have any children.  Because he took the bare minimum, he wasn't able to extract it all.  A repeat LEEP could be done I suppose but because each procedure essentially "weakens" my cervix, I doubt he would consider it at this point.  He feels strongly that it's not going to turn cancerous in a short period of time which is why we will just monitor it with paps I assume.  The doctor I saw today was very rude to the point where my CRNP called me to apologize for his behavior and recommend I go to this other doctor because she knows what a rough year and a half I have had and wants to see me get the care I deserve (which she could probably get in trouble for but I think she was coming at me from a woman's point of view rather than a nurses).  But because he refused to discuss anything other than my results,  I am not really sure other than serial pap smears what any other options would or could be but I have joined a different site dealing primarily with HPV and these women have been through it too so I feel pretty comfortable moving forward with the fertility specialist and finally truly TTC.

Also on a side note,  HPV is pretty scary.  I never thought I would ever be dealing with this.  I have practiced safe sex and took precautions however, you can end up with HPV even when using condoms and can even have contracted it from a partner from years ago and have it not show up for years down the line.  Did you ladies know that 85% of us will find out we have HPV at some point in our lives?  It's a high statistic but I just want to stress the importance of yearly pap smears.  I am lucky I am religious with mine because who knows what it could have progressed to if I hadn't caught it now.  So please please please, if you have been putting off a pap smear please go get one!  

[JoyRenee]

I couldn't open your post earlier, too! How weird was that?!

Anyway, I'm so very sorry to hear about the pre-cancerous cells that have been found. So is your goal to have kids and then... what? Do they recommend a hysterectomy or what will they do to prevent it from turning into cancer?

That is so hard, so stressful and I'm so sorry! My MIL had ovarian and cervical cancer and survived. But it was hard. She ended up getting a hysterectomy, so that is why I asked. I wondered if there was anything else they can do other than that. Sorry if my questions don't seem very sensitive. I just want to understand better!

*HUGS*

[SillyRenee]

Thanks you guys.  I just can't wait...I have wanted to be a mom forever and for it to be time to get it going, here and now, it's just so...exciting but scary.  I really hope this new doctor listens and understands.

Nickie- did they put you on Clomid??

[nickieb85]

We are so alike. I am young yes 23 years old but my body is acting as if it is much older than it is. For some reason when I quit ovulating I had another irregular pap. I saw my fertility specialist monday and she put me on provera and explained everything that they will be doing. There is alot that you have to go through but it will be worth it!

[smjmekg]

I'll definitely be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, you've been through a lot in the past year, maybe this specialist doctor is just what you need, and like blueeyedtabbycat said, it won't be long until you're holding one or two of your own. Just keep in mind too that God doesn't put you through anything you can't handle. Maybe he's giving you a hard time now so when you're awake at 1, 3, 5 am for a feeding or a diaper change you'll be more appreciative than some of us with our lack of sleep, lol. Hang in there and stay strong. You're time will come soon, hopefully sooner now that you're getting the help you need.

[SillyRenee]

Tabitha..way to make me cry. LOL Thank you so much... I am excited that I might get the help I seem so desperately to need.  We kind of put a hold on things for awhile because I got news in October that my office was shutting down (love the economy) however we actually had a general office meeting today and we will for sure be opened until  the end of next year (2010) and it just set off the baby plan... 3 months of clomid (hopefully resulting in a pregnancy) nine months of carrying, 8 weeks of maternity leave and that puts me close to our office shutting down and how nice would it be to be able to stay home for awhile while collecting unemployment and a severance package? However things don't seem to go as planned with me...haha.

[blueeyedtabbycat]

Oh hun, I will definitly keep you in my thoughts and prayers! Having a baby is the greatest joy in the world. I think once you get started getting a little extra help it wont be long untill your holding one or two of your own:) Sometimes the road to happiness is a little bumpy, but we eventually get there:)
Hugs, Tabitha:)