Use of Emergency Contraceptive with pregnant women?

[Hammaxster]

Everything I have read and researched indicates that the morning after pill is not effective is a woman is already pregnant. Everything I can find on the web indicates that it would not harm a fetus or cause a miscarriage - HOWEVER, one of my close friends tells me that her doctor told her to take a double dose which may cause termination, despite that she is 2 weeks pregnant...

Am I wrong to be suspicious and not beleive what she is saying?

[alaysha]

EC is a high dosage of contraceptive... made of basically the same things as regular birth control. It doesn't have the chemical that is found in the abortion pill. I took EC to prevent pregnancy and because the baby has already implanted it didn't do anything. It can prevent pregnancy if conception has already taken place but implantation has not. But that isn't something I would mess with if I was her since even a single dose isn't good for you. God knows what would happen if she took two.

[Hammaxster]

Thanks... So, do you think she is being honest when saying that the doctor told her to take a double dose in order to terminate the pregnancy? She maintains that the doctor told her that there was a 50% chance that this would work... Everything I have read is consistent with what you wrote, but she claims that this caused her to terminate after being 2+ weeks pregnant... It just doesn't make sense to me. Thanks again for your input and perspective on this.

[FEMMIE]

me and my DH had lots of unprotected sex when we were first dating and i did take the morning after pill for 6 weekends straight ( i know it was not recommended but i did do it ) however i was on antibiotics for one weekend at the begining thus making the morning after pill unaffective .. and i have my beautiful baby boy on the 3rd of novemeber 2006 .... i would of been a week gone when i took one lot of morning after and then every weekend for at least the next month ... i never knew i was pregnant till i went to the doc asking for heart burn tablets :S and due to me wanting them u cannot take them if u are pregnant so she did a test and i nearly fell off the chair ... i was told that the morning after pill is COMPLETELY useless if u are more then 3 days pregnant it will not cause a miscarriage it just wont do anything ... ( i was terrified when i found out that i would loose him because of me taking so many pills) but nope he is fit healthy and a complete angel most days lol

[FEMMIE]

there is no way it would of ended her pregnancy if she was 2 weeks +

[Hammaxster]

Thank you for your input. I think that this is a case of a woman lying because she is trying to hold on to me. There are other factors involved - including that: she told me she was preg after I told her that it was a mistake for us to sleep together and broke things off with her; she refused to take a preg test in front of me and show me the positive result; and she refuses to let me go with her to the doctor so he has no proof that she really is/was ever pregnant.

I am a mess because if she really is/was pregnant then I want to do the right thing and be there for her, but if this is a lie then I need to get as far away as possible and never speak to her or see her again. This is just a terrible situation - because I feel that I am being held hostage by her and in the end I may never know the real truth; since she will not provide any proof...

I asked this question because I think the fact that she claims the doc told her to take double dose of EC to cause a MC is strong evidence that this is in fact a lie.

[mamafessler]

I really dont think a doc would reccomend that.  It could be harmful to HER, so obviously it could harm a fetus if she was/is indeed pregnant.  However I think a normal doc would talk about scheduling a D&C/abortion, in order to keep HER safe and healthy.   Sounds like you are being played...

[Hammaxster]

Everything I have read and heard indicates that EC is just extra strong birth conrtol and would not actually harm her or her fetus - do you have any sources you can share with me that indicate anything different?

I have built a solid case as to why I think that I am being played - but its just so hard to believe that someone would do that to another person. This is not some little white lie, this is a major thing and it is effecting me in so many ways. I really don't want to "tell her off" just yet, because I want to get proof that she is either lying or proof that she is/was actually pregnant. If she is/was preg then obviously that changes things a lot.

The only thing I can think to do is to tell her that I NEED TO GO TO THE DOCTOR WITH HER AND GET PROOF, else I am forced to believe she is lying and I will never talk to her again. If she is telling the truth then hopefully she will let me go to the doctor with her and find out, but if she is really lying then she will obviously refuse to let me go - because she knows that she'll be caught in this huge lie...

Does anyone have any other advice for me on how to get a definative answer as to if this is real or just a pathetic attempt to keep me around???

[njeosys]

Man you're in a tough place. I really feel for you! You really should get more information on EC. It can cause m/c but alaysha & your doc are right when she said it doesn't always work (as she ended up having her baby). There is a percentage that it may work, and a percentage that it may not.

May I ask why she would want to m/c her baby if she wants to continue with you? Legally you can't make her have an abortion. The choice is completely up to her.

[Hammaxster]

Thanks for the empathy. It is incredibly difficult for me and I actually do HOPE that she is lying...

I have done endless research on EC and can't find ANYTHING that supports that EC "may" cause MC... How do you know that it can cause MC? Can you point me to anything written that would support what you're saying?

She claims that after she took the pills she had bleeding and claims that this it was a MC and that her doc told her it prob was. I don't think that "bleeding" = MC, right? In fact, the bleeding may just be a side effect of the EC or it may be a sign that she is actually preg... Am I right?

I didn't mention before, but now that we are getting into all the details - she first told me that she did want to have the baby... That she had ovarian cancer before and that there is very little chance that she could ever become pregnant... and that abortion or the EC would greatly reduce the chance that she could get pregnant in the future etc (again, all of my research says nothing about EC/Abortion making it harder for women to get preg, but who knows - def could be true given her history/cancer).

I hope I don't sound like a jerk for saying so, but I am a (semi)young man and not looking for anything with this woman and not ready to be a dad - so I made it very clear to her that I would not be ok with her having the baby... and after a lot of crying and discussion she agreed that having a baby would not be good for either of us and that we would proceed with termination.

Legally I would not be able to stop her from having the child if she decided to; but if she is lying then it would make sense that she "agreed" to do what I wanted (to make me feel guilty) and to keep me around while we work through this together...

I think that in her head she thought that if she tells me she's preg either:
-I tell her that I want to do the right thing and see this through, then when she mysteriously has a MC we remain together...
OR
-I go through the (fake) termination process with her and comfort her and spend time with her

Either way she get more of my time and attention, rather than losing me all together. Maybe I am an ego maniac, but she has previously shown signs of being extermely needy and somewhat irrational.

But again... I still have no way to know if I am being played and lied to, or if this is in fact for real!!!! HELP!!!!

[tarajanes]

Wow man i feel for you,only a back street doctor would say take 2 bc pills to miscarry,maybe suggest visiting a doctor together,so she can get checked out.

[mamafessler]

Ask her what specific med/EC she took.  She should be able to give you an answer.  Is she says she doesnt know/remember ask what pharmacy she used and ask her to call.  If she refuses to call, go to the pharmacy alone and say you were supposed to pick up a RX for her.  Usually all you need to know is her birth date.  Tell the pharmacist it was for EC and see what they say.  I know some places you do not need a script for EC so it wont work if she didnt need script.  But as far as I know Plan B is the only one you can get w/o a script.  I said it would be harmful to her in the respect that a single dose of EC is considered safe, but to double that, I am sure there would be some major side effects.
Oh and how does she know she is 2 weeks preggo....that is WAY early to even get a positive on an HPT.  Usually you cant get a pos HPT until you miss a period, which you are generally 4 weeks along at that point.  I am not sure I have ever heard of a 100% positve pregnancy diagnosis at only 2 weeks.  Is that 2 weeks since you guys had sex or was it a "lucky guess"?  B/c if it has been 2 weeks since sex, then more likely than not she is just "guessing" she is preggo.  And if she says it is b/c her period is late....haha....google late period causes and you will see TONS of things that can make a period late.  Seriouly, I think she is just trying to keep you in a relationship.  Maybe tell her if she can be honest and open with you (say by showing a pos HPT or taking you to docs) then its not going to work out.  Then wait it out.  I feel so bad for you....wish I could offer some more help.

[njeosys]

I found this, and other articles. This particular one is about Plan B. I typed Plan B abortifacient into a search engine. Try searching for EC abortifacient.

FDA Approves Plan B Abortifacient for Over-the-Counter

By Peter J. Smith

WASHINGTON, D.C., August 24, 2006 (LifeSiteNews.com) – The US Food and Drug Administration (FDA) announced today its approval of Plan B, the abortifacient “morning-after pill” as a non-prescription drug to anyone over 18. The move has caused an outcry from pro-life groups who say that the high hormones doses of progestin in Plan-B also cause the abortion of a conceived human embryo and leave women vulnerable to health risks.

Under the FDA’s rules, Barr Pharmaceuticals Inc. will be allowed to distribute Plan-B on a dual prescription program that requires women over 18 to show proof of age, and minors to exhibit a doctor’s prescription. The company claims two Plan B pills prevent pregnancy once taken within 72 hours of sexual intercourse.

“When used as directed, Plan B effectively and safely prevents pregnancy," the FDA claimed in a statement.

However, Associate Executive Director Dr. Gene Rudd of the Christian Medical Association, the nation's largest faith- based association of doctors, said in a press release that the FDA’s decision gives a “politically motivated definition of pregnancy” and “violates the crucial medical principle of informed consent”.

“Many women in America would not take it if they realized that it can have the effect of preventing a fertilized ovum--a living human embryo--from implanting in the womb and having a chance to be born, said Dr. Rudd.

Pro-life spokesmen have pointed out that not only does Plan-B act as an “emergency contraceptive” by preventing the release of an egg for fertilization, but that it causes the abortion of an already conceived human embryo by making the womb’s nourishing endometrium hostile to implantation.

In a recent press release, the president of Human Life International, Rev. Thomas J. Euteneuer, stated "President Bush's implied support for the abortion-causing drug Plan B is completely inconsistent with his recent veto of the embryonic stem cell research (ESCR) funding bill. What the president apparently fails to realize is that Plan B kills the same innocent unborn children that the ESCR process does."

Both the Christian Medical Association, an association of 17,000 doctors, and Concerned Women for America (CWA) have criticized the FDA’s absurd rationale in distributing Plan B without medical supervision, which requires medical oversight for lower doses of progestin (the hormone in birth control pills) in order to protect women from serious health complications such as blood clots and stroke.

CWA president Wendy Wright also criticized the FDA’s rules which make keeping Plan-B out of the hands of minors seem just as effective as preventing minors from receiving cigarettes.

“Any adult male who is having sex with a minor could walk into a pharmacy, buy the drug, and coax the girl into taking the pill,” said Concerned Women for America’s Wendy Wright. “Parents have the right to know their daughter’s medical needs and to support them in the process.  The FDA’s irresponsible action today takes those rights out of a parent’s hands and gives them to ill-intentioned perpetrators.”  

The decision to approve Plan-B now removes the major obstacles in the confirmation process of acting FDA commissioner Andrew C. von Eschenbach, whom Sen. Patty Murray (D-Wash.) and Sen. Hillary Clinton (D-NY) had vowed to stall pending approval of Plan-B.

See Previous LifeSite coverage:

President Bush Approves Over the Counter Early Abortion Pill, Pro-Life Base Decries Move
http://www.lifesite.net/ldn/2006/aug/06082101.html

CMA Doctors: FDA Move to Allow 'Plan B' Without a Prescription is Unsafe and Unwise
http://www.lifesite.net/ldn/2006/aug/06081101.html

FDA Commissioner Hearings Begin: Nominee Takes Heat from Both Sides of Abortion/Plan B Debate
http://www.lifesite.net/ldn/2006/aug/06080301.html

[njeosys]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergency_contraception

[Hammaxster]

That is EXACTLY what I have suggested... but she keeps flipping out on me for not trusting her, screaming at me and crying, and telling me that she needs to deal with this on her own, etc - despite the fact that I am offering my support and telling her that I should have a right to be there and want to be there for her, etc...

So keep in mind that she refused to take a preg test in front of me; and now she is saying that she does not want me to go to the doctor with her because she is not comfortable with that.

It just seems to me that if someone were truly pregnant they would have no problem providing proof to the alleged father. The fact that she won't do these things - and other things that don't add up (like the orig question about using EC to "trigger" MC) makes me think it is all a big horrible lie, but again - I have no way of knowing.

Also forgot to mention that she claims that she was on birth control when we had sex (I know I should not have trusted her and just used a condom and I am an idiot for that). If she was on the pill then it's supposed to be 97% effective or something - but of course she may have been lying about that too...

This is just the most horrible situation and I'm all out of sorts. I will speak to my doctor and see if I can get advice/coucil from a medical expert about this, but everyones input and support is definately appreciated.  

[njeosys]

bleeding could be a side effect. You should go to the doc with her. Tell her to go to a diff one for a second opinion. You don't sound egotistical. I don't know any man that likes clingy, needy women. If you guys don't mesh together, you don't mesh! You're young, move on, find someone who will make you happy, you will make you more than happy to be a husband and daddy (if that is what you're looking for).

Figure out what is going on and hightail it outta there! If she is still pregnant, it doesn't mean you have to stay with her. Be a supportive father, but you don't have to marry the woman.

[tarajanes]

Um i would be questioning that also,i think you have answered your own question.definately seek advice from a professional,good luck to you.

[njeosys]

Whoa... just read what you wrote to tarajanes. I would just leave. Sounds like too many things aren't adding up! It's impossible to know you're pregnant at two weeks because medically speaking, when you're two weeks pregnant, you're actually at CONCEPTION. It is the way they date pregnancies. They don't date at the time of conception, they add two weeks to your pregnancy age by dating to your last menstrual period. So technically, she would've conceived at two weeks "pregnant". Even a blood test couldn't tell you that you're pregnant at conception.

Just get out. Find someone else. It may hurt her feelings but in the long run, you'll be better off and so will she. I feel bad she had cancer, but that doesn't mean she can manipulate you.

[Hammaxster]

This has all happened over the course of a few days... I had a conversation with her on THURS and made it clear that I wanted to end things... Most self respecting women would not beg for another chance, but she did - and I agreed to see her on SUN to talk about it (which was a mistake). Friday (she claims) that she had an allergic reaction to mushrooms and had to go to her doctor. She claims that her doctor wanted to cover all bases, so she tested for pregancy and she learned that she was in fact preggo on SAT. (Would a doctor test for preg if someone went in for an allergic reaction? I suppose it's possible but seems a little suspicious) On SUN she made attempts to contact me and I blew her off - telling her that I was too tired to see her, and in response she tells me she is pregnant.

If she found out on Sat wouldn't she have contacted me right away? Seems strange that it took me blowing her off for her to come out and tell me.... No?

There are just too many holes in her story, but how could someone actually do this to another person? If she is not being honest with me then she is a sociopath and has some severe issues and she needs help. This is so unfair to me. She maintains that she is the victim, but I sure feel like the one who is being victimized.

[Hammaxster]

Oh, make no mistake about it - I will get out as soon as possible!!! I cannot wait to run away and never look back. This is absolutely insane and no matter what happens she and I will never be.

My only hang up is that I want to know the truth. I do not want to have to spend the rest of my life wondering if I am in fact responsible for taking a life; and if I just end all contact now I'll never know the truth and there will be a large part of me that will actually feel bad, because if she is being honest then I don't want to be "mean" to her while she is going through this...

God I am such a sucker... I want to be sensitive and be a good person through this - but I also don't want to be a fool and put myself through any unneccesary pain/suffering. It's a catch 22, because either way I'll prob never know the truth... Unless in 9 months she shows up with a little me - and that would be the worst outcome of all. At this point I don't think that is going to happen though, especially since her latest story is that she is no longer pregg; that she took a HPT (without me there) and it came back negative...

[mamafessler]

Run away...run far far away.  You sound like a reasonable and intelligent young man, you should not be brought down by this womans neediness.  She needs professional help, or so it sounds, but it is not YOUR responsibility to make sure she gets it.  I would recommend counseling to her and tell her you need to move on.  And move quickly and then do NOT contact her.  Next thing she will be saying she has an STD just to get close to you.  <---I knew a girl that did that to a guy.  Said she had HIV and she didnt...screwed the guy up bad though.  Seriously get out of that situation.

[tarajanes]

I truley think she is telling you lies,and you would be surprised what lengths some women do to hold on to there men.im sure that would have been first thing she would have done,(tell you sat she was pregnant.)its only when you said your not interested that she informs you she is pregnant,um alarm bells,if she wants you in her life then she has to agree to you both visiting a doctor,explain if she doesnt do this then you are walking away.at least if you get to the doctors,thinks can be confirmed for you.but honestly i would walk away,she's hurting she was obviously very fond of you.but she will get over it,and if it turns out she is pregnant,then im sure you will be there for the baby.she is playing games with you.

[Hammaxster]

I forgot to mention that I also happen to work with this woman... which only makes this mess even more complicated and unavoidable.

Hopefully in the end this will turn out to be a valuable life lesson about being selective about who I choose to go to bed with, using proper protection, and not dating people at work.

I will keep everyone posted on how things progress... and what ends up happening. Thanks again to everyone and please pray for me and wish me luck.

[alaysha]

First of all she wouldn't have gotten a + test at only two weeks on a BFP since it usually detects at about 4 weeks. If I was you when all of this is over I would explain to my boss what is going on and also get a restraining order on her. Seems like she might do anything at this point.

[alaysha]

*sorry HPT not BFP :)