Aa
custody
Were not married. So if we break up I get custody of her til the court says otherwise?
Best Answer
If you're not married then you have the natural birth right to her but he will be allowed visitations if he wishes. The laws are a little different in each state but most likely there won't be much he can do unless he can prove you are an unfit mother
I live in Texas. He has a history of DUIs and domestic violence
You have to have solid proof of him being an addict or history of abuse because otherwise they will consider it hearsay and he will still get partial custody. its scary but ive been thru it.. as long as he wants to see the baby and have partial custody he probably eill unless hes got a bad criminal or sexual abuse history.. i live in pa so it might work differently in other places but this is just based on me goin to court n having these experiences
Exactly. It's a bad situation for anyone to be in I hope it all works out for you
The whole thing just makes me sick to my stomach. I want her to see her dad. I don't want to have to keep her away from him.
@ ashdub yeah I went ahead and looked it up. Even if he's on the birth certificate since were not married she's mine til a judge grants him visitation. So if he were to take her and we didn't have a court order or anything, I have physical custody of her and he could get into trouble
If he is on the birth certificate it is how ever has physical custody of her. If she isnt with you can get her from anyone else and not get in trouble. If you leave her eith a family member or a friend while you go somewhere and he knows it he could just go and get her
In Texas dad still has rights even if he's not on the birth certificate. He has limited rights until paternity is confirmed by a court ordered test. We went thru that with the "baby mama" crap we had the son every weekend court ordered until they were able to set up paternity hearing. We were taking care of a baby that wasn't even his just because the hoe said it was his son. Once they had the hearing she was ordered to pay all the court costs, reimburse lawyers fees and child support given to her
If you break up she's yours. If he wants visitation he has to take you to court. Otherwise you don't owe him anything. I went to a lawyer about it with my oldest lol. Texas is a "man state" tho so they don't care about the drinking he would probably still get the family code rights (every other weekend and holidays and x weeks during the summer after baby is 3 years old) per my lawyer. Cuz my husband had spend 180 days in jail after his 2nd DWI and still drinks and they were like courts like to give dads benefit of the doubt. Blehh but he wouldnt be able to take her from you.
I live in michigan & here if he is on the birth certificate and there is no court order for custody/visitation he can take her and doesn't have to give her back until you take him to court and get a court order for custody and set visitation and what not. He has equal rights as u do if he's on the birth certificate. Its sad but true. So be careful!
In.PA only if the man is on the birth certificate. If not then paternity has to be proven. Just make him leave if that's your place. Have your mother move in and instead of living in a hotel and paying them to.pay you so you can pay your bills. You can apply for benefits to receive help.being a single mother. He clearly doesn't take this seriously.
it all depends on the state you're in. in pa the mom and dad have equal rights untill its taken to court.
My aunt is currently going through a difficult divorce. Her and her ex husband had visitation agreed upon but nothing filed with the courts. On one of his days to have the boys they were fighting and he told her he was keeping them. She freaked out and immediately went to her lawyers office. She was told that since he was the father and they had nothing official arranged that he had every right to keep them until they went to court. Even the police told her if the boys weren't in any danger nothing they could do. He did keep them an extra day just to hurt her but eventually did bring them back. From that point on until they went to court she didnt allow them to go to their dads. If you have any doubts about you and your boyfriend staying together I would contact a lawyer and see what can be done legally. Hope everything works out. Good luck!!
The apartment we share is in my name but since im not working I have no way to pay the bills until after she's here. One of the cats is my moms but she won't take him cause she's staying in a hotel. The only place I'd be able to go is my dad's and he lives 200 miles away
He's been saying he's gonna stop but I'm 38+3 and it hasn't. I told him last night was his last night out. He needs to stay sober in case I go into labor. He had a shot and about 6 or 7 beers and said "I'm not drunk. I could drive you right now" bull ill be taking a cab. If that's what he chooses alcohol over me and his daughter he doesn't need to be there in the first place. My mom told me he was bad news. I should've listened
Just leave his arse now. If you leave now and dont put him on the birth certificate, he has no rights. My neighbours has custody over his son because both parents had an addiction, court said go to rehab, dad did mom didnt so dad got custody and hell! He still consum drugs but bcuz his addiction isnt "as bad" as the mother the kid gets to stay! Stupid really but short story is you cant base yourself on "hell get nothing" because he drinks. Some judges are dumb, some dont care and to some its just another day at work. It ***** and really i would just make sure he cant even get in contact with you. Maybe even call the cops now and talk to them about what he said. They will be able to tell you what u can do. Maybe they can even put a restraining order on him for "kidnapping intentions" i dunno really, but in ur situation i would definately get away and talk to my local police station to see what my options are. They r always willing to help and they know the law much better then u can interpret it online. With his drinking problem if his drinking and driving just call the cops. Anything to get him away from ur daughter. (and ur cats have nothing to do with it, he just knows it pisses u off and takes it as an advantage. If u have a friend that could take them for a couple of weeks, he wont be able to use them againts you)
^ I was meaning like the actual night we break up. He told me he'll take her with him and I told him if he did I'd call the cops. Since we're not married I have physical custody of her. Even my parents were married and my dad had visitation of me and took me to Oklahoma, my mom called the cops for kidnapping. I'm scared if we were to break up he'd take her back to his home town in Michigan
If you're not married and you put him as the father on the birth certificate than he has as much rights as you do. If he's not on the certificate than he has none. If you both break up & come to an agreement about who gets the child and when then there is no need to go to court. However if you cannot agree to terms then you'll have to petition for custody. You can file for joint which means you both have equal time or for full custody which means you say when he can or can't see your child. He can fight you on it if he doesn't agree with you. In the end, if you go to court, it's the judge who gets to decide the outcome, if you both share custody or if its granted fully to one of you. The whole myth that custody always goes to the mother is false. Many fathers are winning there types of cases. It's best to just come to terms and agree on everything without going to the court system. It's long, expensive and never turns out good for anyone.
I live in texas and it said they believe in split custody. But I would have physical custody of her.
good :) cause i havent even had my baby girl yet and i dont want her away from me
Thanks. I looked it up an it said I have custody of her if we were to break up. Then a court would decide what he gets. Based on his history probably not much
the only thing hes allowed(unless he takes you to court for half custody or full custody), is visitations so 2 hrs every week until the babys 1(some states its 2) the father is allowed 2 hrs visitation a week and one overnight stay on one weekend. Then 3(some states 4) the child would go to him every other weekend, though if hes a unfit parent or living in unfit enviorment there will be no overnight stays until that is fixed. but like ^^ says some states vary im in NC and babys stay with there mama unless shes unfit(until there at least 3). you can look up " Custody laws of _____ " and they will tell you the laws of your state
I told him he has to quit drinking when the baby comes. Then he got mad and brought up my cats and he told me he'll throw them out. I told him no and then threatened to leave. Im so sick of it. How do my cats have to do with his drinking? I don't getiit. I tell him to stop drinking, he says I have to get rid of my cats. It's no where near the same thing
You can also look up your rights as a mother. My sons father is an alcoholic as well but we aren't together. He really is absolutely np good to the point that I'm not even putting him on the certificate. If he wants any part of his son he can take me to court and I will then express my major concerns of addiction and abuse.
There's no way he could cause I know I won't be. He's the one with the drinking problem. We got into it cause I told him she's not gonna be around him when he's drunk. He got mad and said I couldn't do that. Uh yes I can
You are reading content posted in the Pregnancy Community
Get information and tips on how to help you choose the right place to deliver your baby.
Get the facts on how twins and multiples are formed and your chance of carrying more than one baby at a time.
Learn about the risks and benefits of circumcision.
What to expect during the first hours after delivery.
Learn about early screening and test options for your pregnancy.
Learn about testing and treatment for GBS bacterium.
