Hey Peter,
I have had asimilar encounter to this. Only I was so drunk I can't remember ifacondom was used let alone if it stayed intact. I'm driving myself nuts with worry and can't seem to build up the courage to get tested. I know I have to. Not least because following my encounter I presented with some ARS syptoms (minus fever) and then my girlfriend and I had a condom break on us. I pulled out immediately but exactly four weeks later she has presented with a killer headache, extremefatigue and sinus congestion. Again she had no fever but I'm so scared we might both be pos now. If anyone can help or offer any words of comfort they would be much appreciated.
Gentlemen.... try to relax. First off, Peter, yes... you do have a situation to contend with. PEP can be considered for you situation because of the broken condom for anal sex and having sex with a sex worker. They probably wouldn't have given it to you just for unprotected oral sex. Be prepared though. PEP is no picnic. It will be expensive. Not only on the pocket book, but for your body too. The drugs are powerful and there will likely be side effects. However, for you it might not be a bad idea.
foolish_drunk you wont be able to try PEP cause you're past the time necessary. Realistically 24 hours for PEP is best, but it can remain effective up to a maximum of 72 hours. As for your girlfriend, it doesn't sound like ARS to me. Headaches, fatigue and sinus congestion sounds more like a sinus infection or standard upper respitory problems to me.
Both of you will need to test in 90 days with a standard antibody test to be sure of your status. A 45 day test is ok because 98% of people will seroconvert in 6 weeks. However, to be absolutely sure, wait 90 days. If you're like me, you'll still wind up obsessing over the little 2% at 6 weeks...so its up to you.
If you get a positive result, don't panic. As difficult as that possibility is, its not the end of the world. We all learn to deal with risk on a daily basis. You stand more of a risk of dying driving to the doctor's office to get your test done than dying from HIV... yet we blissfully hop in the car and drive away. We've been conditioned to accept that risk and there's no "stigma" in getting into a car crash. If HIV becomes a part of your life, you will survive. You will live. Granted, life wont be exactly the same, but that goes for everyone else who gets diagnosed with other diseases every day.
Hang in there guys. Be strong.
Negative! 82 days is definitive enough for me. Now I just need to stop drinking!