M35 performed/received oral with high risk female with blood

[PgxOffmyChest]

So I’m not in a good head space at the moment. Completely freaking out that I could potentially have gotten something here. I know getting Chlamydia and gonorrhea are normally lower risk with oral (this was unprotected) but I noticed some light blood from her afterwards. Both orals only lasted a couple of minutes and I was not able to get hard so we stopped. I’m worried that the added blood would make my risk factor exceptionally higher? Also if one were to be infected.. then within less than 24hrs have sex with steadier partner. Are the chances of them receiving it too really high? I’m planning on going to get checked in a couple of days but I can’t sleep I’m extremely stressed out and I think I might have ruined a great thing. Thanks so much for your help in advance

[AnnieBrooke]

OK, so since your STD risks don't sound worth losing your mind over, it's probably a good idea to think about this and sort it out. Are you really frightened because you had brief oral with someone, bleeding a little or not, or is what is running the show emotionally that you feel guilty because you cheated on someone? Often guys who write in that they are freaked over possible STD exposure are really just transferring how guilty and scared they feel about cheating. They're worried about getting caught, they feel like a bad person, and it all mixes into obsessive worry about (often slim) chances of having an STD as a consequence of their behavior.

To think clearly and maybe stop freaking out, see if you can sort your thoughts into two paths, one of which would be finding out about your medical risks, and the other being how to keep your relationship good. Try deciding where you want to be with the person you care about, in the long run. Imagine that happy future life. From that vantage point, list the things you have to do now to put you on the  path to having that. Maybe it's being on the straight and narrow regarding sex. Maybe it's an STD test. Maybe it's a sincere commitment to fidelity. Maybe it's a proposal that you and she get more serious. It depends on what you want and where you hope to go with her. The idea of getting an STD (and maybe getting tested, if that will calm your nerves) will recede into its perspective if you use larger life-planning kind of thinking and behave according to it. It will get you out of the bad head-space, too, and keep you from freaking out.

[PgxOffmyChest]

Thank you so much this is what I really needed to hear and I think putting myself in this situation now I won’t ever again it’s not worth this feeling but I’m also just not feeling well with a terrible sore throat and loss of voice, swollen glands, as well as her having a clitoris piercing (no judgement, just haven’t been with that before or with someone that easy). I never thought I would put myself in that situation and I hope that never will again

[AnnieBrooke]

I've had a sore throat lately, too. It's the cold and flu season, and Covid and RSV are also out there. (Try taking a Covid test, you might be surprised. Sometimes it only manifests as a sore throat, none of that losing-your-sense-of-smell stuff with the new variants.) Anyway, try to think clearly. I agree with 517twg that having unprotected sex with a partner you value when you're worried that you have something contagious is unethical, be it an STD or Covid or just a cold. Get your act together about what you want and value with her, and move from there on getting tested or whatever you decide. Good luck!  

[517twg]

I've been in the same boat a few times. As stated above your risk is low but not zero. The concern is if you're having any unprotected sex with your steady partner its unethical. No one can make that decision for you.