This summer I had a night at a hotel I was staying at where I drank 6 pints of beer, 4 shots and 1 cocktail over 3 hours at the hotel bar. I remember last call and my last drink but I have some memory lapse of getting from the hotel bar to my room, which was down the hall and down 1 floor. It was a short walk back to my room in a low traffic area of the hotel. I was the only person in the bar at closing time and probably the only person in that area of the hotel at 1 oclock in the morning when this took place. When I woke up I was perfectly clean without any evidence of having had sex while I was blacked out. However I am worried about whether I had sex when I was blacked out and obsessing about having contracted HIV. I know I couldn't have had sex with anyone in my room because I had a roomate who probably would have mentioned it. Do you think I should get tested or is there nothing to worry about? I am a straight male so I think its very unlikely that:
1) I encountered anyone in the hotel at that time of night who had HIV.
2) That in my extremely drunken state I was able to engage anyone to initiate sex in an area outside of my room.
3) That if I had engaged someone who had HIV that they would have had unprotected sex with me without me remembering it.
I have posted about this in the HIV and OCD forums and everyone tells me my fears are unfounded. However I continue to struggle with this so I thought I'd come here for your perspectives. Do you think I should get tested for HIV after having an alcohol blackout in a hotel, but waking up in my room with no evidence of a sexual encounter?
After a year you would have some symptoms. All evidenc is that you did not have sex or your room mate would have told you.
HIV anxiety is at epidenic levels and has lead many to develop sever anxiey disorders.
You do appear as one and are prime for some therepy. For your mental welfare do get some conseling. Really do yourself a favor as seem to have developed this fobia.
Thank you for your response. All of the evidence tells me that nothing happened. I woke up with no evidence of a sexual encounter. I was most likely too drunk drunk to have sex or even negotiate a conversation with someone. I have calculated the odds of something like this happening and they approach zero. My therapist told me there is no chance that this happened and there is no chance I would not have remembered having sex. However I still cant seem to get over this. I am wracked with anxiety every moment of every day and spend hours reviewing scenarios and calculating odds. I just cant seem to get over this.
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