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My bf and I don't have normal sex and I don't know why

My bf and I have been together for about 3 months now. We've have penetrated sex twice and it was really quick. It's usually he fingers me and I give him a hand job or oral. He's never gone down on me either. I love this giy, dont get me wrong. Just wondering what your thoughts are about all this.
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Avatar universal
Ask him for oral. Tell him to play with your clit show him how.I have so much **** sex and I can tell you you just end up resenting the person. Some people don't know what to do whereas some are just selfish. I hate the double standard of oral sex Btw too
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Avatar universal
My thought about this:

You sound like a normal, new, young couple that is still figuring things out.

Which part of this do you consider "abnormal"?

What is your idea of "normal sex"?

At 3 months, some couples haven't done nearly as much as you two and others have already had sex 90 times. Both are "normal". Also, at 3 months some are still figuring out if they really do LOVE the other person or if it's just lust or just friends.

Best advice I can think of without knowing more about the situation:

Talk to him about sex when you both have clothes on, are alone and not turned on or making out.

Start the conversation casually. Otherwise, he may be reluctant to talk with you or blurt out something like "are you dumping me"?

Examples to get him wanting to talk:

"would you cuddle with me while we talk about personal stuff?" This is called intamacy.

Or "I was embarrassed once and wonder if you have ever been too?" This will get him asking questions too and then you can tell him you were embarrassed because for some reason you thought your sex life was not normal.

Or "I was reading somewhere that normal couples regularly talk to each other about their sex life, I think we should start, how do you feel about that."

Once talking ask him:

What he feels would be a "normal" sex life? Followed by why you think your current sex life isn't normal.

What he likes and dislikes about your sexual relationship and then tell him your answers to same question.

Ask him if he could change one thing about your sex life what would it be? Then answer the same question to him.


Remember, if the two people having sex CAN'T maturely discuss it with one another then they shouldn't be having sex yet.

Don't lie, that only leads to sexual frustration and unsatisfying relationship.

He is just as equally embarrassed as you. A lot of guys don't want to admit to other people whether or not they masterbate, what truely turns them on or what fears they have regarding not satisfying their sexual partner.

All men like to feel "like a MAN" and the best way to get him to open up honestly and talk to you and try new things is to explain to him that you feel a REAL man LISTENS to what his partner wants and then tried to give it to them, and that if he can do that then you are willing to do the same.

Also, some people have fetishes and some people don't. It is better to break up nicely if either of you has a fetish that the other will never be ok with than to make fun of that person or try to get them not to have that fetish. (Some fetishes are cute, simple and healthy and others can be hurtful and negative or land someone in jail so be careful).

Also, your sex life will be constantly changing unless you both get into a routine that satisfies you both so what he likes now might not be what he wants next year so don't ever stop talking.
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