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Not pleasuring my gf when I finger her

So my gf and I have been dating for like a year already and our sexual relationship isn't a problem. But recently she has been wanting me to rub her vigina instead of fingering her, which I don't mind, but I can not do it the way she wants me to. I try but she just dsnt feel anything and I feel really bad that I can't do that. Is their a special technique that goes into it? Or what?
Like I said sex it fine, it's just the foreplay that I can get her in that horny mood. Do you think using a vibrator would be better? I haven't really talked to her about getting a vibrator, I was thinking on just buying one and surprising her with it and I'll use it on her for foreplay and also while we having sex. Or  Is their another way I can arouse her by rubbing her vigina? An is their anything we can do to make this experience more enjoyable for the both of us ?
I need help please, of their is a website or book or something that you think will help out can you also let me know about it. Thank you
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Avatar universal
sometimes its hard for women to communicate exactly what they want… dont give up. Ask her while you are doing it. I would figure this out before you get toys involved…you dont want her to always want the toy.
you'll get it
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Avatar universal
The secret to women's orgasms-
Let me break it down for you….
The most pleasurable part of a womens body is the clitoris … this is why she wants you to rub it instead of fingering… the should be stimulated softly to reach orgasm (follow her body language cues)…
Rubbing the outer clit will cause it to swell (like a penis gets erect) when it is working.
The clit is actually the only way for women to orgasm (most women). The clit extends form the little ball at the top of the vagina… inside and down along-side the inner vagina wall… think of it like a tad pole with 2 tails… the head is the part you rub on the outside… the tails extend on the inside of the vagina- one on each side of the inner vagina. The entire thing is a pleasure-source and the entire thing swells with arousal.
This is how penetration is pleasurable for women… it is the inner clit that is being stimulated by the penis which results in pleasure.
This is where things get complicated sometimes… without initial arousal (foreplay)… the inner clit is nearly impossible to reach (this is why many women cannot orgasm with penetration alone)… it may feel good, but for consistent inner clit stimulation, sufficient prior arousal will lead to the most pleasure.
regarding vibrators… yes, they are a lot of fun (meant for the outer clit).
The secret is to be precise with where you are directing stimulation- weather it be with your finger, tongue, or vibrator (don't just rub it approximately in the right place… make sure you know where it is)… then start off soft (as soft as can be possible)… gradually applying more pressure and faster (but never too hard)… Her reaction will show you the way.
Good luck- your girlfriend will thank me. :)
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
COMMUNITY LEADER
It does take time and practice. If you're touching her a place that feels good then stay at that place. If you touch her in place and get no response then move to another spot. In most women it would be about an inch above the vaginal opening. I hope this helps.
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Avatar universal
She has showed me how to do it the way she likes it but I'm not getting it right, she feels it one moment and the next she's just laying their bored because she dsnt feel anything. Does it just take time and practice ?
Helpful - 0
3149845 tn?1506627771
Hi Got, just ask her to show you how to do it. Just be patient and learn the technique.
I would keep away from sex toys esp vibrators. They can lead to over stimulation where you will not be able to match the movement and she will be stuck with the vibrator instead of you.
Helpful - 0
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