Hi, I belong to a highly refined family. But I have a fetish for women's feet,high heels and stilettos.My family members keep deep dispassion in sexual matters so i could never even think of discussing these with my family.
Breasts, vagina, belly etc are not at all erotic to me. No matter how super-beautiful a woman is, even if i see her completely naked i won't feel anything erotic.
There are gorgeous girls in my family but i don't feel turned on unless they wear stilettos. Even if i see high heels and stilettos, it turns me on but not enough for ejaculation. I also gets turned on if a girl stands on my chest, belly or walks over my back with or without high heels or if she gives me a footjob over my body. But it also doesn't suffice for ejaculation. I think gentle female touches do makes me comfortable but it won't suffice for a continous turn on.
I have to masturbate under a pillow to make me ejaculate. I have to apply continuous to and fro pushing force with the aid of a pillow to make ejaculate. I'll also have ejaculations during some dreams too. I think i will never ejaculate when i insert my penis on a woman's vagina. I always need a bed and a pillow to make me ejaculate.
Does this could ruin my marital life?
I have a lot of girlfriends but my family knows them well as they will be from my own family or any other classy refined family known to my parents. They are like my own sisters to me and i keep pure unsexual love with them and most of them are my relatives. Since I keep highly positive refined relations with them, i could even think of discussing these to them to know the general female outlook to my problem. So women, what is your outlook into this? What will be your probable reaction if at all you ended up with a partner having these problems?
Most probably my marriage would be an arranged one and i'll be married to a refined wise woman known to my family. The problem is i have heard that wise people especially women doesn't have any fetishes nor could they understand them and this thing worries me greatly.
What haunts me the most is about ejaculation. I know that I have to ejaculate into my partner's vagina to have a successful sexual life. But I can't ejaculate unless I have a bed and a pillow. Is a small amount of ejaculate sufficient for a healthy sexual intercourse?
Could this screw me up and turn my marital life to a catastrophe? I've tried hard to develop sexual interest when seeing naked women but i have no feelings and i feel absolutely normal no matter how gorgeous that woman is. This high heel fetish is not overwhelming too. I could control it as my family have instilled a deep sense of dispassion towards sex in my mind.
Also women's high heels and stilettos as such doesn't turn me on. It has to be paired with a girl's feet to make me aroused. I also don't adore high heels and I'm not a slave to it. I've heard that some male boot fetishers likes to wear female boots. But I don't belong to that category and I never use any female items.
So please friends, help me sort this out. Thanks in advance.
I WOULD GREATLY APPRECIATE IF U COULD PROVIDE ME ANY
SCIENTIFIC SOLUTIONS TO THIS.
If you are really distressed about the fetish, you could see a therapist who specializes in matters of a sexual nature. You will doubtless hear that having a fetish is not entirely unheard-of or probably even considered strange. On the other hand, if you want to be able to successfully have a sexual side to your marriage, especially to have children, unless you want to have to masturbate into a vial and have the doctor insert it into your wife, you're going to need to address the inability to ejaculate in a woman's vagina. (You might be surprised, though ... if you can do it into a pillow, you can probably do it into a vagina.)
It is not unusual for a doctor to do an artificial insemination using the husband's sperm into the husband's wife, though the cause is probably usually not than the husband has a fetish that makes him feel turned off about the vagina.
My thought is that the arranged marriage might be either a blessing or a curse in this regard. If you get married to a highly sexed woman, she will certainly notice something is off in the bedroom. But if you marry someone who is merely doing it out of obedience, and then you don't have sex with her, she might find that acceptable. Some women would even find it a relief. Unfortunately this is pretty much out of your control. It's not like you can advertise for a woman from your particular social class who is a closeted lesbian or dislikes the idea of sex.
Anyway, given that you will probably be expected to perform sexually with your wife (and that if you don't, she won't probably understand it as a fetish but will suspect you are gay), your best option is to dig in with a therapist in advance of any talk of you getting married, and try to get to the underlying reason why you're so excited about women in stilettos and nothing else. If you can reach the reason, you might be able to ease the mental block that keeps you from getting aroused in other situations.
Thank you very much 4 replying.
I met my elder cousin brother who is a psychologist and said this to him. He said that whatever works 4 u is that will work 4 u and never try to induce any artificial sexual feelings.
He's saying that it will do more harm than good (It got me scared too). He opined that sex is a natural innate emotion from the deep sub conscious mind. He told me to remove fetishes for non living things like stilettos and heels as it is a diverted useless addiction.
He said that foot fetish is 100% normal and attraction towards foot can never be considered as a fetish. He also revealed that the term foot-fetish
is inaccurate and wrong and preferred to call it foot attraction.
He predicted that i could ejaculate into a woman's vagina if i fill my mind with turn on thoughts. He said that lust is a very powerful emotion. So mere thoughts will suffice for ejaculation if u let it free.
To be frank i am not 100% convinced. Do u have a point?
Nice of your cousin to give you such unhelpful advice. Seriously, speak to a therapist who specializes in sexual issues. They exist, they are not creeps, they are aware that out bodies run to various sexual outlets based on our emotions and early experiences. There might be some things you can do to reach a status of being able to have sex and feel it is acceptable, while also accepting your fetish. It's not sick or wrong to have a fetish, your real problem is that you also want to have a successful marriage. For that, please go talk to a well-recommended counselor. It would be an astonishing coincidence if the best sex therapist in your region happened to also be the cousin you asked. Get a referral from your general practice doctor. You need not tell the doctor your specific issue, simply ask him to find out for you who would be a highly recommended therapist that deals with issues of a sexual nature.
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