Aa
I need help with getting it goin'...
Hello.
So here's the story. I'm 19 and my gf(she is 18) wanted to have sex, I wasn't really feeling like it, because it was my first time, but she had already done it before. So we got naked, but I couldn't get an erection, no matter what. It was just horrible, because she really wanted it, but I wasn't able to do anything. We put some of our clothes back on and we just sat there. The whole situation was just awkward, but some time later I started rubbing her vag and I got a mild erection, so we proceeded to having sex, but after some time it just got limp again and I just stimulated her with my fingers.
The deal is, that I know that I can get it hard, even if we are together, kissing, holding hands, I get a mild erection. I also get an erection from watching porn. I was kinda worried, that I'll be done in a matter of seconds, but this is even worse... Now, I've read some of other topics and as much as I understand, arousal problems are not only concerned by my body, but my mind as well and lately I was mostly depressed and my mind was boggled with all sorts of problems. May that be the case? Also I masturbate rather frequently(almost everyday) and the before we tried something, I did masturbate. I think I'm doing it too often, because nowadays I just do it mostly because I can and not because I feel the need for sexual relaxation. I'm also thinking about quitting smoking, cos that affects it as well...
So, sorry for the lengthy post and I'll be waiting for a reply of any sort, thanks!
So here's the story. I'm 19 and my gf(she is 18) wanted to have sex, I wasn't really feeling like it, because it was my first time, but she had already done it before. So we got naked, but I couldn't get an erection, no matter what. It was just horrible, because she really wanted it, but I wasn't able to do anything. We put some of our clothes back on and we just sat there. The whole situation was just awkward, but some time later I started rubbing her vag and I got a mild erection, so we proceeded to having sex, but after some time it just got limp again and I just stimulated her with my fingers.
The deal is, that I know that I can get it hard, even if we are together, kissing, holding hands, I get a mild erection. I also get an erection from watching porn. I was kinda worried, that I'll be done in a matter of seconds, but this is even worse... Now, I've read some of other topics and as much as I understand, arousal problems are not only concerned by my body, but my mind as well and lately I was mostly depressed and my mind was boggled with all sorts of problems. May that be the case? Also I masturbate rather frequently(almost everyday) and the before we tried something, I did masturbate. I think I'm doing it too often, because nowadays I just do it mostly because I can and not because I feel the need for sexual relaxation. I'm also thinking about quitting smoking, cos that affects it as well...
So, sorry for the lengthy post and I'll be waiting for a reply of any sort, thanks!
Stop masturbating for a week and it wont be a problem at your age.
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Hello.
If you're having erections when you wake up and during self-pleasuring, that's a good indicator that there's nothing physically amiss. So it's obvious that you've created this problem because of your anxiety.
Also: if you want to build up sexual tension and arousal, try not having an orgasm for a few days before you have sex with a partner. And when you DO have sex with her, don't focus on erections, orgasms, etc., but rather on the sheer pleasure of touching and being touched. A sure-fire way to interrupt your arousal and enjoyment is to worry about how things are going.
Let me put it this way: if you were to go to a fine restaurant and spend all your time worrying about how you LOOKED when you were eating, just how much do you suppose you'd enjoy the food? You're worrying is preventing you from become aroused. If you'd like more information about this, I recommend the book "The New Male Sexuality" by Bernie Zilbergeld, Ph.D., widely available online, both used and in paperback. This book has helped hundreds of thousands of men to better understand their sexuality. Best of luck to you. Dr. J
If you're having erections when you wake up and during self-pleasuring, that's a good indicator that there's nothing physically amiss. So it's obvious that you've created this problem because of your anxiety.
Also: if you want to build up sexual tension and arousal, try not having an orgasm for a few days before you have sex with a partner. And when you DO have sex with her, don't focus on erections, orgasms, etc., but rather on the sheer pleasure of touching and being touched. A sure-fire way to interrupt your arousal and enjoyment is to worry about how things are going.
Let me put it this way: if you were to go to a fine restaurant and spend all your time worrying about how you LOOKED when you were eating, just how much do you suppose you'd enjoy the food? You're worrying is preventing you from become aroused. If you'd like more information about this, I recommend the book "The New Male Sexuality" by Bernie Zilbergeld, Ph.D., widely available online, both used and in paperback. This book has helped hundreds of thousands of men to better understand their sexuality. Best of luck to you. Dr. J
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Discharge often isn't normal, and could mean an infection or an STD.
STDs aren't transmitted through clothing. Fabric is a germ barrier.
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