Hey Amanda.
No one can diagnose your condition with an exam, so if you truly want to know what's going on, you should see your gynecologist for a complete exam. You may be having an allergic reaction, or something more serious. If you're experiencing any kind of pain or discomfort, get to your doctor.
However, it's also important to realize that the glans--or head--of the clitoris swells during sexual arousal, due to blood flowing into the area. Once you have an orgasm, the blood leaves the area, and the swelling subsides. If you're being sexual without having an orgasm, the blood will leave the area much slower. If this is uncomfortable for you, the solution is don't have sex without having an orgasm. Good luck! Dr. J
Are you taking birth control or antibiotics because that happeneds to me and I'm allergic to some antibiotics. It could also be a type of yeast infection.