my dad has an aggressive cancer and i need help

hi. my dad has stage IV of stomach cancer and he's in critical condition right now. he barely eats; it's usually like 3-4 teaspoons of his pureed meals. he's been restless lately and can't sleep at night because of the pain in his stomach, so what the doctors did was give him some morphine and sedatives so that he could sleep, but that's all they've been doing and nothing else. they don't feed him anymore and he doesn't stay awake for more than a few minutes because the medicine makes him fall into a deep sleep again. they say that it'd be fatal if they tried to take out the tumor in his stomach through surgery, and my mom tells me that he's too weak for chemotherapy because his immune system is weak and doesn't have enough good cells. i can tell he still has the fighting spirit and doesn't want to die yet, but his body's just so weak and i don't know what else to do. has anyone experienced this before or have met someone who's been through this but survived? i really want to help my dad get through this and i don't want to sit back and wait for him to die like everyone else.

[S. Kaul, MD]

Hi there!

Unfortunately it would not be possible for me to offer advice on the issues without knowing the relevant clinical details such as the type of cancer, extent or spread, organs involved etc. Stage 4 stomach cancer usually has a grim prognosis while management is usually palliative and may include various treatment modalities taking into account the type of cancer and its spread. I would suggest discussing the situation, the management plan and the expected prognosis in detail with his treating gastroenterologist. Oncologist.

Take care!