Aa
Paranoia?
On the morning of yesterday, July 3rd, I was out drinking with (trusted) friends. I don't drink often, and I drank a bit too much. I did NOT vomit and believe I remember most of the night.
My friends offered me a ride home at around 4AM, but for reasons unknown to me now (due to intoxication), I demanded on going home in a cab.
They let me go in a cab (while getting the license plate number). When I got into the cab, the driver saw that I had been crying (again, due to intoxication). I remember him reaching over and wiping the tears from my face with his hand. I remember being mildly uncomfortable and just insisting that he take me home. I remember saying, "You're upset. Did you get in a fight?"
I remember us approaching the street I live on, and I thought for some reason he passed it, and asked him. And he said, "No, we're on your street, don't worry." I remember paying him a reasonable cab fare of $6.90 + tip. I remember getting out of the car, back into my apartment, doing a normal bedtime routine, getting changed, and going to bed.
The cab fare checks out. The time elapsed between when my friend told me I got in the cab, and when he texted me at 4:34AM and I was already in bed... all make sense.
I had a panic attack thinking about this yesterday and got a partial rape kit done yesterday. About the only helpful, stress-alleviating thing I received there were medications to prevent/greatly reduce my chances of contracting pregnancy, HIV, and other STDs. Since I know so little, I can only take precautions.
Is it possible for the cab driver to have changed his meter and done something? Is it possible, in such a scenario, that I would not have remembered an assault, as I remembered getting into the cab and was rather normal upon getting home? Is it possible to have such a brief blacking out?
I hate not knowing. And I have a very important standardized test in two months. And don't have time to worry or brood, and wish someone could honestly tell me not to.
My friends offered me a ride home at around 4AM, but for reasons unknown to me now (due to intoxication), I demanded on going home in a cab.
They let me go in a cab (while getting the license plate number). When I got into the cab, the driver saw that I had been crying (again, due to intoxication). I remember him reaching over and wiping the tears from my face with his hand. I remember being mildly uncomfortable and just insisting that he take me home. I remember saying, "You're upset. Did you get in a fight?"
I remember us approaching the street I live on, and I thought for some reason he passed it, and asked him. And he said, "No, we're on your street, don't worry." I remember paying him a reasonable cab fare of $6.90 + tip. I remember getting out of the car, back into my apartment, doing a normal bedtime routine, getting changed, and going to bed.
The cab fare checks out. The time elapsed between when my friend told me I got in the cab, and when he texted me at 4:34AM and I was already in bed... all make sense.
I had a panic attack thinking about this yesterday and got a partial rape kit done yesterday. About the only helpful, stress-alleviating thing I received there were medications to prevent/greatly reduce my chances of contracting pregnancy, HIV, and other STDs. Since I know so little, I can only take precautions.
Is it possible for the cab driver to have changed his meter and done something? Is it possible, in such a scenario, that I would not have remembered an assault, as I remembered getting into the cab and was rather normal upon getting home? Is it possible to have such a brief blacking out?
I hate not knowing. And I have a very important standardized test in two months. And don't have time to worry or brood, and wish someone could honestly tell me not to.
I think you were just jumping into conclusions ... your now living a new day move on relax and let the past be the past ....
You are right, it has happened, and it is highly unlikely, particularly in your specific case. Please don't drink so much in the future! 'Safer' drinking practices would include only drinking at home, and if you drink while out with freinds, agree ahead of time who will be the sober driver as well as that you will only leave with that driver. And most of all, know that drinking is never totally safe, no matter what you do. I would hate to hear that anyone had something bad happen because of drinking... i DO hate it, because I have had it happen. Fatal car crashes, criminal activity, jail-time, cheating, drug-overdose, hospitalization... you name it. Be gentle with yourself. :) - Blu
Thank you. I needed to hear this, and deep down I think you're correct that I was overthinking this and need to avoid alcohol.
There HAVE been a number of reported cases of sexual assault by taxi drivers though, so I must respectfully disagree with your second thought.
There HAVE been a number of reported cases of sexual assault by taxi drivers though, so I must respectfully disagree with your second thought.
Panic causes people to think irrationally. Sounds as if this is the case with you. According to what you have posted, you were not assaulted, the cab driver was honest and simply concerned about your well-being. Another thought: cab drivers drive cabs because they need the job for money to live, so for a cab driver to behave in a criminal way would guarantee job loss as well as freedom. Please relax. You do not need to worry about this. But you do need to avoid alcohol. :)
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