Hi Rapunzel43, I'm so sorry that you are dealing with so many issues. It seems to me that your whole being is shaken up and disturbed by many different factors. I just wanted to encourage you to seek help, even though it seems like an awfully difficult task to do for you. I don't think that anyone can answer or help you on this forum or even over the phone. And at this point you just can't help yourself. Please, get help!
As for your question about the shower, it is possible to do it in 10 minutes. I live in a warm place so I do it in the morning (shampoo my hair too) and again at night before going to bed (just a quick soap up and rinse). Even when I shave my legs and underarms, I don't think I spend more than 15 min in the shower.
And please know that I am not physically limited in any way and I'm not judging people who take long showers. Some people actually like it and do it for pleasure and relaxation.
Maybe you could try just that? Get in the shower and don't think of it as a chore. Just try to relax and let the water flow all over your body. Forget the soap and shampoo if it's too much to do, just try to relax...
I wish you well!
I'm sorry you are having this difficulty. Well, one thing that may help which I do often now due to a life that now includes kids and time constraints on the morning, is that I shower at night. My hair still looks clean and fine in the morning. And I am clean for the day. You can buy a shower cap if your hair doesn't need to be washed every day (I generally do wash mine daily but have friends that do not). You can set a timer and get in and you have that much time to shower that you preset (5 minutes, no more than 10). Get in, rinse, shampoo hair, rinse, put conditioner in, wash/shave, rinse out conditioner, get out. I often have something in mind I am going to do after my shower---- have a snack that I want or watch a show on Netflix . . . and if I get my shower -- then I get to do that thing. So, I keep it moving for that so it doesn't get too late.
But the problem is the anxiety. I can tell you that and all . . .but unless you are treating your anxiety, this will still feel like an ordeal. Do you see anyone for your anxiety and ocd? Any therapy and medication.
In general, adults should be clean. :>) In summer, when temps are warmer or if you live in year round warm climate, you'll need to shower more. I wouldn't go more than every other day without washing key areas. Good luck