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You could try some kind of over the counter cream like vagisil or monistat. They are supposed to relieve itching and I think that they also moisturize the area. I think they are mainly for yeast infections but the swelling, itching and pain can all be symptoms of yeast infections, so it might help.
The monistat cream (not the yeast infection medicine) and vagisil are not "medicine" for yeast infections. They just provide relief from the itching etc. You would not want to use an actual yeast infection treatment (ex. Monistat 3 or Monistat 1 etc.) because you can build up resistant yeast in your body if you use those too much or when you don't have yeast. The creams are not actually medicine to treat the yeast. They are just for relief.
Thank you for your comment. I will try a hot shower as I don't have a bath tub. I am still hoping that someone can reccomend something like a vaginal moisteriser or some kind of cream. I am looking forward to the sorness going away, and next time we have sex perhap I'll try lubrication, or I'll just stop when it starts to hurt.