ADD ADHD ODD severly abused globally delayed 8 year old

[missylou4]

I lovenly have obtained custody of my ADD ADHD ODD Globally delayed abused grandson. I was able to obtain full custody of this child last week. I rescued this child from The Va. Institute for Children in Richmond VA. The conditions in this facility were worse than my worse nightmares. My grandson was released with a nonacute status. He was there for two weeks. My grandson is currently taking zoloft and ritalin. He is seeing a therapist twice a week. He seems to progressively get worse as time goes by. I have had several semesters of abnormal psychology and child psychology, I have worked with individuels that had severe psychological problems. I need help . I am at my wits end with my grandson. Maybe I am to close ..but the local mental health community is coming to me for answers.. I do not know what to do.

[Sandman2]

Hi missylou,
  Thanks for the additional info.  I am not sure how it works, but I would think that keeping the court informed and involved would be in your best interests.  Do you have a case worker or anything that can act as a go-between?

[missylou4]

I appreciate the info. I also understand the situation with conditioning. believe me all to well. My grandson was born to my 14 year old daughter who has no idea who his father is. I raised my grandson  for the first 4 years of his life. My daughter then convinced the court she was able to care for him. The inner city life he led was a nightmare. I am very aware of the long road ahead of us. But being under the courts scrutiny I am so afraid of making the wrong move.

[portuguese mom]

Listen also to Sandman2. He is very wise in his comments.

[Sandman2]

Something to think about.  You have had custody for about two weeks now.  He was in the institute for two weeks.  He had 8 years of prior conditioning before this.  His problem will not clear up over night.  Yes, it is very important to get the correct medication level.  That will probably be trial and error.  However, the main thing to realize is that you have to deal with 8 years of learned behavior.  That will not change overnight.  You might want to check out the book "SOS:Help for Parents", by Lynn Clark.
If there are specific behaviors that are driving you nuts, try posting in the Child Behavior forum.  You can't take a "shotgun" approach to this.  Pick one behavior and work on it, and then move on.  This will take patience.  Just remember, you have about 8 years of conditioning to overcome.

[portuguese mom]

Hi again. Try to post in the Behavior Expert Forum. See if the doctor in that forum can help you. Do tell the doctor that you already went to Duke Medical and tell him the diagnosis by Duke Medical and the type of doctor that you saw there.  Tell him the behaviors and issues that he has. See if that doctor can guide you to a second opinion. Maybe the diagnosis is not right or the two medications are not working well together. Good luck. You sound like a great grandma. God bless you.

[missylou4]

Thank you for your info.  My grandson is on a high fiber no sugar, all natural diet.  no junk. I am the mean dietary grandma. I give him omega 3 6 9 complex with a c supplement. We have tried all the medications available. slow release is a nightmare. I have also had him seen by the mental health staff at the Medical College of VA and Duke University in Raleigh N.C. No one has been able to help him. Any more info will greatly help!!! Thanks

[portuguese mom]

Maybe the medicine is making his behavior worse because the professionals have not correctly diagnosed him or the medicine is not right or you are giving the wrong dosage. If he really has ADHD, have you tried to give him Ritalin only?  Usually Metadate CD (slow release version of the Ritalin ingredient) seems to work better for children than immediate release Ritalin. You can also post on the "expert behavior" forum to the doctor in charge of that forum. Give him examples of the behaviors that your grandchild shows.  Also tell him which major city you live close to. He porbably will tell you to go get another professional evaluation at the major urban University close to you with a Children Medical and mental department. I am no expert, but it is very hard to get one medicine to work let along two. You should also talk to your doctor about trying the ADHD medicine alone.  Keep it simple and see if his behavior improves. Also, cleanup his diet (no sugar, no artificial stuff, no coloring, no preservatives), cook from fresh ingredients and do not used processed food, give him fish oil (Omega), vitamin supplements and lots of sleep (make sure that he is in bed early).  Also make sure that you catch him being good and you praise him/ reward him when he baheaves well. How does he behave with other kids from a social point of view? Does he play, talk  and interact with other children? If not maybe he does not have ADHD and he is in the Autism Spectrum.  In such a case, the medicine could make his behavior worse. You probably need a second opinion and an evavluation. Please post and ask the Behavior Expert forum for an opnion. Good luck.

[missylou4]

I need help for my grandson that the local mental health community is not able to provide. He is showing behavior that is beyond the realms of his initial diagnosis

[imanaddict]

I'm not real clear on what your question is? What do you need help with exactly?