Depression as a withdrawal symptom

[rain]

I had surgery for colon cancer when I was 20 and immediately after was diagnosed with severe acid reflux with stomach spasms.  My family doctor has been prescribing me with percocet and Losec for pain for the last 2 years.  I was taking 2 pills when required (approx. 2-3x/week).  There have been days before when I didnt use anypills, and I was fine.  The last 2 months before I quit my job was very stressful and I was experiencing pain all day, and I started to take percocet all day-everyday (not to exceed 5 pills/day) and Ativan 1mg (when required).  I now find since leaving my job I am no longer experiencing any pain and would like to discontinue use.  I stopped taking them 3 days ago and now am having cold sweats, shaking, moodswings, insomnia and SEVERE DEPRESSION/PANIC/ANXIETY.  To relieve some of these symptoms I started to take 1/2 pill 3-4x/day.  I am no longer experiencing the shaking but still have the depression/panic.  I have just started a new job and feel that I don't want to or can't do it.  It comes and goes numerous times throughout the day and is so overwhelming I have to force myself not to just walk away from the job.  Is this a symptom of withdrawal or am I even having withdrawals at all?  If it is a symptom of withdrawal, can I expect that sooner or later it will deacrease then be eliminated completely?  I am desperate to find an answer as the 3 doctor's I've seen just gave me Darvon or some other prescription that I dont think I want.

[spook]

Tara,this is all perfectly normal,you should never abruptly stop Opioid(narcotic)Analgesics or Benzodiazepines.
you are on day 3 and your symptoms are peaking from both drugs,just taper off slowly as you feel comfortable,but switch to valium as your benzodiazepine.

[To Tom and rest of forum from Maryanne]

Tom, I just read your post about what's going on at work and how upset and depressed you've been about taking the pills.  I am so sorry to hear what you are going through and you know I'll be here for you.  I do not judge you Tom and do understand how you feel.  I myself should have been half way through med school by now and guess what?  Pills have gotten in the way - all the call outs, the cop - outs, the lieing to get what I think I want and need!  It sucks, doesn't it?  It's alright though  -  there is light at the end of the tunnel and when you are ready to live a life clean of all drugs, you will know and I want you to know that I will do everything I can to help you -  Your friend, Maryanne
PS  -  keep in touch via email and from now on, I'm going to try to read through these comments more thoroughly, I had no idea this was going on...

[rain]

Hi Katie,

Actually, I think you responded to my question a couple of weeks back when I posted the question at the top of this thread regarding depression as a withdrawal symptom (that is pretty much all there is to my story).  Now I am weaning myself off of percocet with the help of everyone here.  I am having alot of ups and downs too but I am trying to stay positive.  I was reading your posts and feel very scared for you.  I know what the initial withdrawal felt like (which seemed to be 100 times worse),and I cannot imagine going through that numerous times.  I hope that things get somewhat better when you return to work.  I know that the busier I am, the more I can keep my mind off of the pills.  Do you know what happens at AA or NA meetings as I am totally clueless on this subject?

Have a nice day!

Tara

[andrea_s]

I second that! This forum is the only place I open up and spill my guts. And it does help to know I'm not alone.

[Frank]

Well folks,

When I originally posted it was kinda of like hurling a rock into the sky, not knowing or caring where it would land, just a moment of frustration when I could be honest with someone. Obviously it's virtual honesty, but the people in this thread are just like me. Addicted, wanting to change, not wanting to change, intelligent, functiong people who are trapped. I have see so much caring and inspiration in the last week, just in this thread. I think maybe you will be my friends. Oh I have plenty of friends who think I am successful, a family man, a great guy to have a beer with etc. But there is not a soul in the world I can talk to about my dependence on pain killers. I just want to say thank you all for your kind words and encouragement to each other. Tom, hang in there. I think what I see here is insight - we may not have a lot of other good characteristics and I even consider myself an upscale junkie, but I really want a better life and can really feel for the first time that others out there have the same regrets and suffer from the despair I do. That means something, it really does.

[andrea_s]

Hi Tara. Your post was great. Thanks! I guess we do beat ourselves up alot....but you're right when you say at least we are here and facing the fact that we have a problem. You guys are a great bunch of people. This forum has been a lifesaver for me. Up until a year ago I thought I was alone. I still have my same problems but at least now I have people to talk to about it.
Tara......what is your story? How did you end up here? I could probably read back and find some old posts. :) Just curious how you ended up in here and how long you've been struggling with this. Again...thanks for your post. I needed some perking up!