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Family Intervention - Worried
k, so now my relatives are planning an intervention to try to help get my husband clean.
He claims he has already quit c\t and showed some signs of withdrawal but he is not under the same roof anymore so i am not exactly sure how bad. Its seems pretty quick to me and he has been on for years with several periods of trying to wean down. The worst of course ends up that not only is he trying to kick the pills, he has every bad habit of "addictive" behavior.
At a family function, he was quick to replace red wine to kill his soreness and went double fisted. I am thinking he was not on pills to be able to drink that much so perhaps he did recently quit.
My father in-law is ex-military and kept his family tightly controlled in dysfunction. He is known to be a drunk himself, has been calling him a junky and telling me to leave him for at least a year. But he too lies and makes up stories on occasion. He is planning to kick his sons *** so to speak and try to get him in a 28days program. Perhaps why my husband has never really been able to grow up. Mom taught the kids to do\say anything to keep the peace and sneak around. Sis shows habits of narcersism but has spirts of healthy thinking.
So they want me to join and i wonder will the sessoin portray love. I know nothing about intervention and have been reading the codependant books etc to try to cope. I so want to help my husband for his own well being and then for the well being of my children. I have put myself and relationship on the back burner so we can take this journey and hopefully someday find our way back, but i feel like they are sucking me right in and when the dysfunction flys how the hec am i going to stay healthy and not have my husband feel betrayed. Maybe i shouldn't participate? I found perscriptions stolen from my five year old nephews refills, the madness has got to stop. Worried.
He claims he has already quit c\t and showed some signs of withdrawal but he is not under the same roof anymore so i am not exactly sure how bad. Its seems pretty quick to me and he has been on for years with several periods of trying to wean down. The worst of course ends up that not only is he trying to kick the pills, he has every bad habit of "addictive" behavior.
At a family function, he was quick to replace red wine to kill his soreness and went double fisted. I am thinking he was not on pills to be able to drink that much so perhaps he did recently quit.
My father in-law is ex-military and kept his family tightly controlled in dysfunction. He is known to be a drunk himself, has been calling him a junky and telling me to leave him for at least a year. But he too lies and makes up stories on occasion. He is planning to kick his sons *** so to speak and try to get him in a 28days program. Perhaps why my husband has never really been able to grow up. Mom taught the kids to do\say anything to keep the peace and sneak around. Sis shows habits of narcersism but has spirts of healthy thinking.
So they want me to join and i wonder will the sessoin portray love. I know nothing about intervention and have been reading the codependant books etc to try to cope. I so want to help my husband for his own well being and then for the well being of my children. I have put myself and relationship on the back burner so we can take this journey and hopefully someday find our way back, but i feel like they are sucking me right in and when the dysfunction flys how the hec am i going to stay healthy and not have my husband feel betrayed. Maybe i shouldn't participate? I found perscriptions stolen from my five year old nephews refills, the madness has got to stop. Worried.
whoops on the last click. Thanks for your post.
Anyway, i'm not sure were you got the idea he was in jail. I asked him to leave and he is staying with his sister (of all places) his mother lives there too. She goes from screamming mad to taking care of him, he basically moved from one couch to another. Not taking responsibility for anything.
Anyway, i'm not sure were you got the idea he was in jail. I asked him to leave and he is staying with his sister (of all places) his mother lives there too. She goes from screamming mad to taking care of him, he basically moved from one couch to another. Not taking responsibility for anything.
I hear ya.........
LOL..LOL..LOL
It took you 14 months..what makes you think I am going to do it in 30 days? LOL
It took you 14 months..what makes you think I am going to do it in 30 days? LOL
d a m do you ever sleep........lol
Wow you said a lot in your post...........from your husbands addiction you your sick out of your mind with him about his addiction and everything to go with it.............to your drunk EX military father inlaw to a sister who lives in narcersisim to his lies and his lies and his lies to nephews only five and getting narcotics which enables him to a dysfunctional family screaming for help.........I guess your plate is pretty full over there.........
If I may first you realize that he has to want to quit before any of this happens unless of course you use his jail time to bribe him into an inpatient detox and drug rehab to get him out of jail card........
His pain will cause justification in his mind but drinking is the wrong way to handle that......
As for you I can only imagine the mental angish your going through I'm surprised your not the one popping Valium or Xanax like M&Ms..........
Seriously I would really try to bribe him to at least inpatient detox by means of a bail bonds and make him sign a contract so that if he breaks his word his bond is revoked and he goes back to jail...
While he is in jail can you get the whole family together for dinner and talk like rational human beings........and try to come up with an intelligent sollution to your husbands addiction to get him clean at least.........If by some miracle this happens if the General can stand down and the sister cool her jets maybe something very positive could happen with your family so that some kind of peace and normal can bestow upon your family.........
I wish you tons of luck and my prayers.......
If I may first you realize that he has to want to quit before any of this happens unless of course you use his jail time to bribe him into an inpatient detox and drug rehab to get him out of jail card........
His pain will cause justification in his mind but drinking is the wrong way to handle that......
As for you I can only imagine the mental angish your going through I'm surprised your not the one popping Valium or Xanax like M&Ms..........
Seriously I would really try to bribe him to at least inpatient detox by means of a bail bonds and make him sign a contract so that if he breaks his word his bond is revoked and he goes back to jail...
While he is in jail can you get the whole family together for dinner and talk like rational human beings........and try to come up with an intelligent sollution to your husbands addiction to get him clean at least.........If by some miracle this happens if the General can stand down and the sister cool her jets maybe something very positive could happen with your family so that some kind of peace and normal can bestow upon your family.........
I wish you tons of luck and my prayers.......
Good Morning!
In most instances I would say intervention is a wonderful idea. However, his family does not sound like they looking to do an intervention. It sounds like they are going to lynch him. Do they have a professional that will be sitting in to mediate? Find out what you can before you commit. If they don't have a professional, then it will simply be the family attacking him. That's not the proper way to do it.
Good Luck hun, and keep posting. Hope to hear from you.
In most instances I would say intervention is a wonderful idea. However, his family does not sound like they looking to do an intervention. It sounds like they are going to lynch him. Do they have a professional that will be sitting in to mediate? Find out what you can before you commit. If they don't have a professional, then it will simply be the family attacking him. That's not the proper way to do it.
Good Luck hun, and keep posting. Hope to hear from you.
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