Pillhell,
Sounds like you are making progress to me. It takes some severe bravery and persistence to even make a start against the monster.
Do be careful with the Xanax. I took benzos like candy for months, thinking that they were helping me with withdrawal. I became severely addicted and the benzo w/d was perhaps worse than the oxy withdrawal.
GWH, I could end up where pillhell is right now pretty damn easily. Wouldn't take too much to put me back there. I for one gotta stay scared. How about you?
Hey, guy... STINGRAY? Nice car!
I think SPEED is my new addiction. No, not the drug, but driving quickly.
Oh, if I could afford it, my dream would be the fastest production car out there today (top speed 212 Mph) v-12 Dodge VIPER. I guess that I have that addictive personality, I DO have the need for speed. I live in Nebraska, and there are a LOT of straight and level highways to "test" your car's abilities. Also a very LAX State patrol helps. I once drove from Omaha, Ne to Lincoln, Ne (57 miles on interstate 80)in less than 20 minutes in my old RX-7 -- I must have averaged 125 MPH. Since I've been SOBER from the booze for almost a year, I don't fear being pulled over, as the worst thing I could get would be a speeding ticket, and NOT a DWI and Jail time!~
Jess
P.S. that's great that you've tapered down to 1/6th of your previous Codiene habit. Keep it up!
Some people might thing I was reffering to a LEXUS l300...
But, NO, I have a SATURN L-300. Loks like an Audi, has a 200 HP V-6 made by Benz/GM. VERY NICE. It's amazing what you can make a car do if you've got some Programmig expertise.
Go to www.saturnbp.com and look at the l300. All Leather, decked out to the max. My license plate says, "It BURNS"
I never thought I'd be a Saturn owner, but after I test drove it, and it drove as well as my 94 RX-7, I was hooked....
But what about me!!!!! haha, just kidding, yea, it does help, its just so irritating to see where I was 2 months ago, I think back and I feel like saying, "you dumb ****, wake up, what the hell are you doing!!!" you know? its really annoying, anyway, I definitely laughed at your drag racing comment, but an L300, I don't know what that is?? what kind of car?
Hey, guy... I get irritated too if I am reaching out to someone, and get no replies. But, as you and I both know, Addiction is a SELFISH disease. We always put OUR suffering in front of everything else, and until an addict can get to where you and I are now, it's VERY hard to get out of your OWN situation. I find that reachingout and helping others that are going through HELL helps me keep sober. Don't you? I think that if I hel only 1 person out of the countless times I've written here it is worth it all. You've helped a lot of people, so don't let it get to you when someone is still "In themselves"--
Hope you're doing O.K.
P.S. My new car probably can't beat yours, but I'm having a LOT of fun smokin' the little riceboys who pull up in goofy-looking honda's and accords that want to drag race. My car is a new (2002) L300, and I reprogrammed the black box to "racing standards" (low-end power) and I can pull off 0-60 in about 6 seconds. If I could only take off the speed limiter (can't go over 130, or the computer automatically baks off on the throttle!)
Have fun!
Jess
your really starting to irritate me, I have answered you 3 times and so haven't others and you never reply, all you do is re-ittirate your story all over again......... Are you even trying to do something? or are you just feeling sorry for yourself. Its as simple as this, if you want to quit you have to work at it, you have to try 24hours a day, who cares if you stumble, you have to get back up and keep trying!!! have you read any replys that you have received? .............