I am back the new relapse queen

[dedicatedtostop]

Not gonna go into detail so of you may know me. Ii was clean for over a year and all it took was 1 time. Well here I am a year later worse off than ever. With that said I woke up one day an realized how bad I was screwing my life up, affecting my family and etc. Not to mention the fact that I am lucky I am not in jail. So I took the plunge and dove in again. I am at the end of day 2 and all has been pretty much as expected.
The difference this time... I told everyone. My whole family. My family, well I like to say thick as Theives. With that said I am FORCING my self to eat and FORCING exercise. You get out of it what you put in right?!! I have 2 little girls and a family that is my world and I know if it don't stop I will die. Crazy thing is I wasn't raised this way and I know better. I have everything in the world yet I have nothing:(... What I do feel right now is no more guilt and no more feeling like I am living a lie. But man it sure does suck. I am fighting for my life here. Anyways, I am going in with a different approach and really just wanted to get back established here. The time I quit for a year I swear I could not have done it without this forum... Just looking for more support

[dedicatedtostop]

Good for you, keep me posted, I am sure I will need lots of support too. My day 2 is almost down and I am looking forward to going to bed as soon as I can. Keep posting

[Innerstrength67]

Thank you and bless you! My quit date is in one week. We can fo this, stop living a lie and stop spending lots of money.
I'm going to attend meetings and post like crazy everyday.

[dedicatedtostop]

Thanks for the comment. I just want to get it all over with. I am detoxing at home as a stay at home mom with 2 little girls.. Talk about rough. BUT I Did it before so i know I can do it again, this time I will not give up... I know there is no other option. Bless you!!!

[Innerstrength67]

Congrats! I relapsed as well with 3 weeks off Vic's but was taking morphine so it really didn't count. I'm getting ready for my quit day and scared as hell. What I have come to finally realize is that I'm a a drug addict. I like you never thought this could ever happen to me. The drugs cover up what is really going on inside of us and until we deal with those issues, there is always a chance of a relapse. Hang in there!!! You are giving me hope. Thank God we found this forum.