OMG you have willpower!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don't have willpower. That's why I had to do it.
Those little bastards were mocking me from the medicine cabinet. I have no way to get more (cannot elaborate, sorry) so the bottle I had were the last I could get. I reasoned that one second of strength, (flushing them) would prevent hours, possibly days of mental anguish about eating them. Good F******G riddance!
good for you now where do you live so I can jump in your sewer...lol...just kidding. You are doing great with the right mindset congratulations. Be PROUD
LOL, the rats in my sewer are probably bouncing off the walls.
Congrats to you! That takes a lot of courage. That shows dedication and strength.
I don't think ive ever read a post that made me feel so many things. What you did showed a lot of courage. So, what R your plans now? Have you already quit? tapered? I was just wondering if you had been through this before and are prepared. for what's next? You have already mentally beaten the beast, the physical should be no problem> great job!!
I don't consider myself to be strong. If I were strong, I never would have allowed myself to get hooked on these things in the first place. I think a better way to say it is "fed up". I was just totally sick of the roller coaster. I was always making excuses. Next week I'll do it, I'll start tomorrow, blah blah. I just got tired of lying to myself.
Just because you are an addict, does not mean you are weak. No one has strength unless they have overcome some kind of weakness...that is how I see it. So, by flushing the little terds down the toilet, you are saying NO to your weakness, which shows strength. I commend your efforts and your ability to "own your shi*."
Plus, if you had bought those off of the street, then I'm sure that was a lot of money! Where I am, that is about $500 worth of drugs! That is an accomplishment within itself :)
I could have easily sold the pills, but the thought of me helping someone else get hooked would be worse than the withdrawal's I'm going through. I'd rather eat the cost than make one more person a slave to this garbage.
I never thought about that at all. I have a friend who has genuine pain with kidney stones. Her doctor will not prescribe anything strong enough to kill the pain,,,,or so she says. Sometimes I feel so bad that I give her pills (she does not have a lot of money, struggling with being self-employed) These pills cost $5 a piece, so it adds up! Sometimes I just lie and say I don't have any because I know I could take them myself or actually make some money back.
The next "shipment" comes in on Friday. On Tuesday, she said "God it is so far away, do you know anyone else?" She already owes me $100 from past "shipments." I can't afford to give her anymore for free....now I'm plagued with the guilt of adding to her addiciton.
I never thought about the tragedy I could be causing someone else. How selfish am I? It is fine for me to be addicted and dealing with it, but to instigate and tempt someone else? Thanks for the thought...it has opened a new door.
I'm glad you are having second thoughts about selling your pills. Just think about the first person who gave them to you, and how different your life would be if that hadn't happened.
Tragically, it sounds like the drugs already have a grip on your friend. Just tell her you can't get any more and that you're sorry. I'm really broke right now, and could really use the money I could have made from selling them, but I couldn't live with myself. I just want them out of my life forever.
Tell your friend that whatever pain she needs these pills for probably pails in comparison to the pain of withdrawal which she could experience. Use yourself as a living example.
I do not think I would be so worried about it if she were just an addict. She tells me everyday how much she hrts and how I am the only one who cares about her pain because I search for pills for her. She has probably spent $500 on frauds on the internet. I could say n if she were just like me....a complete addict. But her pain plays in the back of my mind.
Hey, lets all pack our things...sans pills and go to Mexico. Just run away, that's the answer...I'm kidding everyone, calm down! :)
Imagine if we were all in a room together right now...sweaty, nervous, shaking shivering messes. What a sight we'd be!
I just did the same thing flushed those jerks right down the toilet and quit smoking two days ago...but it seems like forever..i was having pains in my legs all night and I couldnt sleep when does it get better..I feel worse off of them then I did on them
WTG TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!! What you did takes allot of guts and strength! Please keep us posted how you are doing.
And by the way, I laughed my a s s off at your comment:
" the rats in my sewer are probably bouncing off the walls"
You seem to still have your humor, thats a plus!
Congrats to you!
It WILL get better soon!!! I myself, wouldn't have quit both at the same time, but if you can, awesome!!! Its gonna get better, tomarrow will be a little better and day 5 is the best...
I understand what ur saying abot hookin others up....Almost EXACTLY 3 years ago my best friend, myself and her husband ALL discovered Vicodin at the same time. My friend had a tubal and was kickin back and I was there and her man. We had noticed she looked kinda high, like she was buzzed. Now, her and I burn, so this was different. Her husband asked her and she was like Yeah, I took two of the vicodins my Dr. gave me for the pain and I feel all floaty and nice. WELL. Thats all she needed to say... I had had a standing script for vicodin for years, hardly took it unless I had too for migraines, and it worked. Because I followed the Drs. instructions on it...for pain relief....not boredom relief!!!!! So, I walk to my house ( four houses away ) and ,Yep, a full bottle of vicodin.
There is no need to even tell the rest of the story is there?? You ALL know what happened right??? Since I had access, I hooked us all up. Best friends share everything right??? Then, out of nowhere, like a freight train, I became addicted....and I changed.....and she changed....and he changed....They watched me fall down the hole. She knew what was happeneing and could not stop it. I couldn't either. Eight years of being best friends was lost in this....Her husband is addicted now.
On my 10th day of being clean, we talked. We are are work in progress always, but always meant to be friends. I an ashamed of the habit I acquired and shared with them. I supplied them for a bit and eventually they had to get it themselves. But.....had I not shared, had I known then what I know now.....so many things would be different. Right now our friendship is the best and we have new respect and we watch out for one another more closely. She VERY much keeps me in check. I appreciate that. Her and her husband have a plan for next month. Her man isn't incredibly deep deep deep in this, maybe two a day... so his w/ds will be fairly minor, I would think, but they have a plan and this website is very much a part of it!!!! I would NEVER had shared anything had I known what would happen........
50 ocs can be worht between 500 nd a htousand dollars and 100 doalars worht of percs to i give you props i couldnt do that
i am in awe great job i am jealous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy for you !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!