Light at the end of the tunnel

[joycee418]

I don't even know where to start. I have so much to be thankful. Especially for being now 6months of Lortab. God, made a way for me, where I coudn't see freedom. Yes, I was given Subutex 2mg. I was never able to take the whole a amount so I was always taken less the amount of the 2mg. I am down to a crum every other day. I realize that a big part of  a lot of the symtoms I been having is do coming off the Sub. Lack of sleep, body hurting waves of hot/cold clamy, wanting to be by myself, other body symtoms,etc. Yes, I wish I was never given Subutex, but too late.  I like to know if all my interest in life, feeling better, all that comes back correct. I am numb at times. Normal right??  I really dislike having conversations, and expresing my self. I can tell you one thing I DONT EVER WANT TO BE DOWN THIS ROAD AGAIN! I DISPISE  IT WITH ALL MY BEAN! I also notice that I am mad at myself and comdem myself a lot. I catch myself saying well I did to myself. And yes I did, and no I am not looking for the poor me thing either.  I know in oder to have healing I have to just let go and work in this area. I know God is at work and I am on  my way  healthier road. I guess I just want to see the Light completly. But I didnt ge here over nigth either. God Bless everyone!

Joycee

[joycee418]

Hello,
I want to thank you guys so much for all your words and support. Everyone has great advice. Yes, I must forgive myself, in order to keep my healing. I appreciate you taking the time to read my question. I am very blessed to have everyones support!!!
God Bless!

Hugs,
Joyce

[gnarly_1]

HI joycee...ive been told that coming off sub is similar to coming off methadone your having a lot of the same symptoms I had when I was in the lower doses of methadone
its just a grind to get off of but with Gods help and your determination you will get free of it...with methadone it took a good month to feel better after I stoped taking it dont know if sub hangs on that long or not....ask ga guy hes got sub experence and im shure he can fill you in better then me....just know it does get better each week that passes
you will start to feel a bit better then the week b/4....I got 129 days in now and im at
80% still having sleeping issues every once in a wile like last night and the night b/4 but prior to that things got much better after 90 days...just hang in there a wile longer
YOU CAN DO THIS and God will help you threw it....just have faith ..good luck and God bless......Gnarly  

[pharma9]

You are doing a phenomenal job...but Vicki said it best...first you have to forgive yourself and the continue in your healing.
Admitting your fault in all this is OK,but for true healing you have to forgive yourself for it all and get on with things as you are doing...keep going girl..you are doing great...

[cleanmom]

You have expressed my sentiments exactly. I am feeling a lot of those same things right now. At least we have each other here, and of course, God. Nice post, keep up the good work, Joycee. Luv, Jacky