Aa
Nervous about some things....
Hi gang...I found this site last night and read many comments during the night and can appreciate the support that goes on here...it's comforting to alot of people who go through similar hell. I decided last week and told my Dr. on Friday I wanted to start tapering off my pain meds...my upper GI & stomach have been killing me cause of my usage over the last 7 years...I've always used more then I was suppose to and felt only I understood my pain...my meds are prescribed 40 mg. oxycontin 3 daily and vicodin as needed for the breakthrough pain no more then 8 a day...that's how I'm suppose to take it anyway....usually it's 5 oxy a day and about 20-25 vics. Since Friday I've only taken 3 oxy's a day and no more vics at all and it's been tough but I have to do this....next week I'll go to 2 a day and so on...I'm so glad I found this site I think it's great to be able to talk to others about this...I do have a major concern though that got my anxiety up so bad last night I couln't sleep and is still worrying me today....in the past when I was out of the vicodin and was hurting really bad I've gone to the ER and gotten a shot of anti-inflamatory/larazopam or a shot of morphean and I would get a script for the vicodin or percocet enough til I could get mine filled usually 10-20...I've had to do this several times the last 5 years or so....after reading several articals last night on the net cause I wanted help with all this and finding this site I realize and fear I could actually be in trouble for doing this...I didn't think that's what they consider Dr. shopping....now I'm scared to death I'll have a policeman come to my door any time now cause of the extra use of my pain meds...when I say I'm nervous or scared it's a major understatement....I haven't drank in 2 & a half years and I'm addicted to tranquilizers and don't wanna do either to calm my nerves...I don't know how bad I messed up with the extra pain meds and if I'm in any trouble but I wish I wouldn't have read the article I did. I've had 5 back surgeries the last 2 surgeries were to repair a burst fracture at my T-12 that severed my spine...I truely have been in bad pain and needed pain meds but I also know I've abused my meds. I have to stay on course here with the tapering and I'm determined to but being the alcoholic and addict I am I know my bad thoughts and nervousness can cause me to say screw it...I know I wrote way to much but I wanted to explain my situation and the worries I'm having....the support on here what I've seen is just great! I hope tonight I can calm down a bit and actually get some sleep tonight.
Your condition is exactly the same as mine. I have finally found someone who claims to be cross-addicted, in reference to alcohol and opioids. Everyone else just claims to have problems with pills. My story is a little different in the fact that I started with pain medication for pancreatitis from my drinking in my 20's, I'm now 36. In any event, I was started on 20mg. 3 times per-day of oxycontin, for my pain. Well, within 4 months I was up to 320mg. of oxy's per-day and that wasn't curbing my pain as good as the 20mgs. were in the beginning of usage. So what I began to do is start drinking again, to try and stop the pain, even though alcohol was the cause of my pain. I would never have pain when I was drinking. And as you know, oxycontin is not as accessible as alcohol. Where I live, you can't swing a dead cat without hitting a liquor store. And my doctor wouldn't give me anymore oxycontin. As if that would have made a difference. I've been off oxy's and alcohol for 3 weeks now, due to Suboxone, which is actually 50% opioid itself. I've only read good things about it, but I'm concerned that it might be difficult to eventually some off Suboxone. At least it's less narcotic than oxycontin and I'm taking much less of narcotics than I was. In closing, I would just like to say that it's a constant battle, and my biggest concern is that I will start drinking again. So far I've been coping without much problem, but I know how the mind works, one minute your fine not thinking about drugs or alcohol, then suddenly something as inconsequential as hitting 3 red lights in a row can trigger you and then you find yourself at the liquor store or in your narcotic bottle. Again, I am reserving decision about Suboxone, and hoping that coming off that won't be a tremendous battle. Best of luck to you.
Thanks! I started that spinal decompression thing I mentioned to you on another post. I went yesterday for the first time and if you want any info about it, you can send me a private message. Love and Strength to ya!!
Just stick with your doctor if he is willing to help you taper down so can provide some of the comfort meds to ease the withdrawal's. Dont worry about the DEA, I felt the same way you did 9 mos ago when my 2 dr's cut my off at the same time and i worried about that for month's. I would worry more that the IRS will write wanting back taxes from 3 yrs ago than the DEA looking for you. Just keep reading, learning and asking questions to help you recover.
Thanks again...it's already easing my mind....the one thing I can't do is let my nerves get out of control over the situation...I know I can get off these pain meds with help from others and being able to talk about things bothering me but I stand no chance if my mind wonders & worries you know what I mean? It scared me enough to never ask for any kind of control med from any Dr. but my own! Thanks gang...
i agree with micheal---don't worry, because you can't change that part of it..But like he said you had issues of real pain...I am just glad you found this site and realize that you could get into trouble...But just try to worry about getting clean right now...I think you had anything to worry about your doc would already know and would of cut you off..
keep the faith.
r2r
keep the faith.
r2r
Stop fretting that the police will come to your door. What usually happens in an E.R. is that your name will go on a unofficial list and they will stop giving you pain medications. This is not a good thing because they might not believe us when we really are in trouble. Also the E.R. does report your visit to your regular m.d. and he might be pissed. Some drs. do drop patients over things like that because they are afraid they will be the ones in trouble. Sounds as if tapering is working for you. It does not for everyone. I tapered and have been clean for 51 days today. I didn't taper too fast and let my body readjust at each step. Cold turkey works for lots of people. Only you know what can work. Stop worrying about the police unless you get drugs illegally. You are taking a lot of pain meds, but others have come off of much more and been wonderfully successful. You probably will have some trouble sleeping as you come off. Read old threads or ask questions about what you can do that might help you. Its not fun comming off, but it is so worth it.
Thanks for the replies...I'm the typical acloholic mind...I try to creat a mountain out of a mole hill and I realize worrying about things that haven't happened won't do me any good.
I wouldn't worry much about the police. Houston is the Pill Mecca of the US and I've known numerous addicts who Dr. shop many times each and every month. I've even been at one of the pharmacies ready to fill my script when the DEA came busting in with shotguns. They simply told everyone to leave and that no more scripts would be filled here. The law has bigger fish to fry than someone seeking pain relief, and with your medical records they could definitely see that you're in pain. Hope that helps to calm you down a bit and focus on the real problem at hand. Good luck with your recovery. Love and Strength to you!!
welcome--you did not write too much...Very glad you found this site...my Doc was hydros so i don't know about your meds, but if you are working with a doc to taper you that is great..
as far as being in trouble i don't think you will have the police at your door...BUT i am not saying you will not be in trouble, but by admitting you have a problem and fixing it will be to your advantage..
Sounds like you have had a long road of pain, so sorry for that.
But now the good thing is you are wanting your life back...
Stay with us, others will be here to help with better adice about your meds..
Good luck
r2r
as far as being in trouble i don't think you will have the police at your door...BUT i am not saying you will not be in trouble, but by admitting you have a problem and fixing it will be to your advantage..
Sounds like you have had a long road of pain, so sorry for that.
But now the good thing is you are wanting your life back...
Stay with us, others will be here to help with better adice about your meds..
Good luck
r2r
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Addiction: Substance Abuse Community
Is treating glaucoma with marijuana all hype, or can hemp actually help?
If you think marijuana has no ill effects on your health, this article from Missouri Medicine may make you think again.
Julia Aharonov, DO, reveals the quickest way to beat drug withdrawal.
Tricks to help you quit for good.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
