Aa
Please help me!
Hi my names is sharon.
Ive had a sad life and at the moment it is taking over! Anyway I have been taking cannabis for about 9 months now all day and ever night. I dont eat, I suffer from depression I am on antidepressants and I have epilepsy! Its getting to the point where my life revolves around just the cannabis and my cups of teas. I have two children who I adore and a wonderful fiance but I cant stop taking the cannabis.
I tryed to come off it a few months back but ended up going mad , cutting myself, hitting my partner, punching myself because all I wanted was my draw! I am seeing a lovely councellor at the moment , and its helped but the last week I have been so depressed I dont know where to turn next. I constantly cry , have no energy and know that the only way to help myself is to first come of the cannabis but there is nowhere to help you for cannabis as they think its all physchological. I get offered aromotherapy and head massages and thats it. I have no will power and ive gone from one drug to the other from alcohol to cannabis its a never ending circle. Yet ive come to the point in my life where I have to stop it. I WANT to come off the cannabis and I feel such a failure for letting my family down all the time and my children. I do it to block out memories from the past, and every day all I do is sit in the house cause I also get scared and panic about going out even to town. Please someone help me this is my last resort as Ive tryed everything else now. Ive been to the doctors, drugs counselling,and normal councelling.
PLEASE HELP !!THANKS
Ive had a sad life and at the moment it is taking over! Anyway I have been taking cannabis for about 9 months now all day and ever night. I dont eat, I suffer from depression I am on antidepressants and I have epilepsy! Its getting to the point where my life revolves around just the cannabis and my cups of teas. I have two children who I adore and a wonderful fiance but I cant stop taking the cannabis.
I tryed to come off it a few months back but ended up going mad , cutting myself, hitting my partner, punching myself because all I wanted was my draw! I am seeing a lovely councellor at the moment , and its helped but the last week I have been so depressed I dont know where to turn next. I constantly cry , have no energy and know that the only way to help myself is to first come of the cannabis but there is nowhere to help you for cannabis as they think its all physchological. I get offered aromotherapy and head massages and thats it. I have no will power and ive gone from one drug to the other from alcohol to cannabis its a never ending circle. Yet ive come to the point in my life where I have to stop it. I WANT to come off the cannabis and I feel such a failure for letting my family down all the time and my children. I do it to block out memories from the past, and every day all I do is sit in the house cause I also get scared and panic about going out even to town. Please someone help me this is my last resort as Ive tryed everything else now. Ive been to the doctors, drugs counselling,and normal councelling.
PLEASE HELP !!THANKS
I HAVE STOPPED USEING CANNABIS AFTER TWO YEARS.
I HAD NO MEDICAL PROBLEM EVER UNTILL I STOPPED,NOW I SUFFER FROM ACUTE PANIC ATTACKS, AND A CHEMICAL INBALANCE IN THE BRAIN WHICH MAKES ME DIZZY,FAINT AND LOSE FEELING IN MY ARMS.MY DOCTOR IS AT A LOSS TO EXPLAIN WHAT COULD HAVE TRIGGERED MY CONDITION(BET I COULD HELP HER!)
THANKFULLY,AFTER TWO MONTHS, THINGS ARE RETURNING TO NORMAL.I HAVE LEARNT MY LESSON WITH SO CALLED "SOFT DRUGS" AND ANYONE WHO THINKS IT IS EASY TO STOP SHOULD THINK AGAIN..GOOD LUCK...SORRY ABOUT THE SPELLING!
I HAD NO MEDICAL PROBLEM EVER UNTILL I STOPPED,NOW I SUFFER FROM ACUTE PANIC ATTACKS, AND A CHEMICAL INBALANCE IN THE BRAIN WHICH MAKES ME DIZZY,FAINT AND LOSE FEELING IN MY ARMS.MY DOCTOR IS AT A LOSS TO EXPLAIN WHAT COULD HAVE TRIGGERED MY CONDITION(BET I COULD HELP HER!)
THANKFULLY,AFTER TWO MONTHS, THINGS ARE RETURNING TO NORMAL.I HAVE LEARNT MY LESSON WITH SO CALLED "SOFT DRUGS" AND ANYONE WHO THINKS IT IS EASY TO STOP SHOULD THINK AGAIN..GOOD LUCK...SORRY ABOUT THE SPELLING!
I can tell you right now that weed is the most powerful addiction I've ever had. I could not stop using no matter what the consequences were. Finally after doing time (3 years) and then having parole afterwards, I had been without for 7 years. The day my parole ended I got some pot... I was still addicted to it without using. For some reason I freaked out, and I tried to smoke several times after that, every time freaking out until I finally gave up on it. Haven't had any in over 2 years. In any case, what I'm trying to say is marijuana can be a VERY intense psychological addiction. I know exactly what you're going thru, and although I found recovery by being totally beat down by life (hehe) I'm sure there has got to be some sort of help for you out there as you're not alone and it is a widespread problem. Unfortunately, I don't know what it is but keep looking I'm sure you will find something. Good luck to you. You're not alone.
I read a posting from some time ago .. below
I recently experienced the same thing this weekend .. first time ever feeling this way .. I did go to the hospital .. i was terrified .. It turned out the last Bump I did was of like 80% proof stuff .. and I didn't know ... I honestly thought I was going to die .. my poor boyfriend was freaking too . I went to the hospital and had a heart rate of 130.. normal I guess is between 70-100. Believe me this was my perfect excuse to QUIT .. problem is .. is that it is a social thing .. I only do it 2 or 3 days a month ( fri or sat usually ) and I only usually do on average .5 grams ... My fear is how do I adapt ? for 2 years now this has been habit.... ?
****************************************************************
Subject: Am I having a cocaine overdose?
Topic Area: Drugs
Forum: The Addiction Medicine Forum
Question Posted By: Ckivlan on Tuesday, May 29, 2001
I was in this forum a few months ago with questions about cocaine and alcohol. Well I am back with another question concerning cocaine. Memorial Day.... Did a few backs of cocaine with a friend and felt great! Went home around 2:30am and layed in bed and thats when it all began. My eyes were rolling in the sockets... my heart began to race... I began to sweat... I couldnt breathe very well. I was breathing but it felt like i could not get enough air! I took a hot bath and felt like i was going to faint... took a cold bath...i was freezing. Anyways, I tryed so many things to feel better up until 6:30 am when i finally began to calm down. It is now 12:17 and i slept about 4 hours. My heart was racing so fast I was about to call an ambulance but my mom would kill me before the cocaine would! I was having these weird convulsions. My arms were shaking and my fingers haven been shaking for months. I really felt like i was dying.... I can't explain how horrible I felt. My question: Was I having an overdose??? or was I just going through something that everybody goes through when they do too much cocaine? Couls I have died??? my EXTREME question... I am a 20 female in Miami, Florida.... I dont have a drug habit but i do tend to use cocaine about once a month and i always over do it... I am leaving into the Navy in October so I hope that will help me alot... if I use cocaine again and i feel my heart racing and etc.etc.etc.... can you PLEASE reccomend something to help when im experiencing this? Is there a special remedy? ANYTHING... please name a few things. Thank you so much.
*MiStiCiLLuSionZ*
***@****
I recently experienced the same thing this weekend .. first time ever feeling this way .. I did go to the hospital .. i was terrified .. It turned out the last Bump I did was of like 80% proof stuff .. and I didn't know ... I honestly thought I was going to die .. my poor boyfriend was freaking too . I went to the hospital and had a heart rate of 130.. normal I guess is between 70-100. Believe me this was my perfect excuse to QUIT .. problem is .. is that it is a social thing .. I only do it 2 or 3 days a month ( fri or sat usually ) and I only usually do on average .5 grams ... My fear is how do I adapt ? for 2 years now this has been habit.... ?
****************************************************************
Subject: Am I having a cocaine overdose?
Topic Area: Drugs
Forum: The Addiction Medicine Forum
Question Posted By: Ckivlan on Tuesday, May 29, 2001
I was in this forum a few months ago with questions about cocaine and alcohol. Well I am back with another question concerning cocaine. Memorial Day.... Did a few backs of cocaine with a friend and felt great! Went home around 2:30am and layed in bed and thats when it all began. My eyes were rolling in the sockets... my heart began to race... I began to sweat... I couldnt breathe very well. I was breathing but it felt like i could not get enough air! I took a hot bath and felt like i was going to faint... took a cold bath...i was freezing. Anyways, I tryed so many things to feel better up until 6:30 am when i finally began to calm down. It is now 12:17 and i slept about 4 hours. My heart was racing so fast I was about to call an ambulance but my mom would kill me before the cocaine would! I was having these weird convulsions. My arms were shaking and my fingers haven been shaking for months. I really felt like i was dying.... I can't explain how horrible I felt. My question: Was I having an overdose??? or was I just going through something that everybody goes through when they do too much cocaine? Couls I have died??? my EXTREME question... I am a 20 female in Miami, Florida.... I dont have a drug habit but i do tend to use cocaine about once a month and i always over do it... I am leaving into the Navy in October so I hope that will help me alot... if I use cocaine again and i feel my heart racing and etc.etc.etc.... can you PLEASE reccomend something to help when im experiencing this? Is there a special remedy? ANYTHING... please name a few things. Thank you so much.
*MiStiCiLLuSionZ*
***@****
yes, again, you could have died, and probably will if you do not stop. that was a warning not all cocaine addicts get. count yourself lucky and take the advice given. Stop.
Thanks, I hope yours is beautiful too. This forum has really helped me and I honestly don't know if I would have made it this far (Day 31!) without all of you. tracy
Ben -- Thanks and I suspect I screwed myself up with first the Ultram (although I was on the prescribed dose) and later the opiates, which I certainly abused.
As far as the Tegretol, I didn't quit my seizure meds completely, I just switched from Tegretol back to Trileptal. They are almost the same med, but Tegretol is generic. That's why I had originally gotten off the Trileptal. But since I still have two weeks of Trileptal left, I thought I'd finish it and then switch to the Tegretol. My body just can't take much more right now, and the Tegretol really made me feel like ****. Don't know why because I have no problems on the Trileptal. But I'm only one month clean, 5 weeks post major surgery (which also put me into surgical menopause), dealing with daily migraines, and trying to straighten out the mess I made of my life before getting clean. So I figured it made more sense not to switch to the Tegretol until I absolutely have to and put more strain on myself.
Meagain -- write to me anytime. I welcome email from anyone, whether we've chatted here or not. My email is ***@****. I'm afraid of my hub reading my posts too, because they are so highly personal and I'm not really ready to share that stuff with non-addicts at this point.
As usual I rambled and forgot the point of this post, so please forgive me. I just realized my addiction doctor's name is actually Dr. Jones. Kind of funny, huh? tracy
As far as the Tegretol, I didn't quit my seizure meds completely, I just switched from Tegretol back to Trileptal. They are almost the same med, but Tegretol is generic. That's why I had originally gotten off the Trileptal. But since I still have two weeks of Trileptal left, I thought I'd finish it and then switch to the Tegretol. My body just can't take much more right now, and the Tegretol really made me feel like ****. Don't know why because I have no problems on the Trileptal. But I'm only one month clean, 5 weeks post major surgery (which also put me into surgical menopause), dealing with daily migraines, and trying to straighten out the mess I made of my life before getting clean. So I figured it made more sense not to switch to the Tegretol until I absolutely have to and put more strain on myself.
Meagain -- write to me anytime. I welcome email from anyone, whether we've chatted here or not. My email is ***@****. I'm afraid of my hub reading my posts too, because they are so highly personal and I'm not really ready to share that stuff with non-addicts at this point.
As usual I rambled and forgot the point of this post, so please forgive me. I just realized my addiction doctor's name is actually Dr. Jones. Kind of funny, huh? tracy
It's never a good idea to stop your seizure meds. Ultram will definitely lower your seizure threshold (making the possibility of having a seizure far more likely) and opiates in general can lower the seizure threshold, in fact, my very first seizure was when I was hooked up to a PCA (patient controlled analgesia - demerol) and had snuck outside for a cigarette. It was an ugly site, what with my head bleeding and my my lovely locks shorn off for the stitches. Please, I'm not telling you to stop the opiates, but please, please, don't stop the seizure meds. I know tegretol, if overdosed can make one into a dizzy, puking ridiculous crawiling moron - I have great success with zonegran, 300 mg. at night. God bless you and take care.
To the rest of you - you were an inspiration to me in times of great sorrow and misery, {My drug of choice was tabs and I took them 7.5 mgs 25 at a time 3 X's a day, and hated myself every 3.8 hours when they wore off - also hated myself when I was fake crying in Dr.'s offices and lying to keep myself in enough pills to make my liver riot.) I'm now 5 months out and beginning to feel like a human again. (Although I still take 10 mg. of Ambien at night for sleep.)
To the rest of you - you were an inspiration to me in times of great sorrow and misery, {My drug of choice was tabs and I took them 7.5 mgs 25 at a time 3 X's a day, and hated myself every 3.8 hours when they wore off - also hated myself when I was fake crying in Dr.'s offices and lying to keep myself in enough pills to make my liver riot.) I'm now 5 months out and beginning to feel like a human again. (Although I still take 10 mg. of Ambien at night for sleep.)
Dear sadshaz:
sorry for just getting in this three days late, but maybe you will read it. My best friend just stopped smoking pot last January 02. She's going through a messy divorce, and her husband is trying to prove she is a bad mother for smoking weed. She is the most wonderful, caring, best mother I know, and he is just trying to hurt her. The reason I tell you this is because she would not have stopped unless this happened. I asked her if she went through withdrawl, and she said no. It is only mentally.
On the comment about your panic attacks. You said you are currently taking meds for depression. Check with your doctor. You might not be taking the right kind. I know a friend who has serious panic attacks and he takes Paxil. Talk with your doctor!
sorry for just getting in this three days late, but maybe you will read it. My best friend just stopped smoking pot last January 02. She's going through a messy divorce, and her husband is trying to prove she is a bad mother for smoking weed. She is the most wonderful, caring, best mother I know, and he is just trying to hurt her. The reason I tell you this is because she would not have stopped unless this happened. I asked her if she went through withdrawl, and she said no. It is only mentally.
On the comment about your panic attacks. You said you are currently taking meds for depression. Check with your doctor. You might not be taking the right kind. I know a friend who has serious panic attacks and he takes Paxil. Talk with your doctor!
i sure hope you are feeling better. also, i hope you stopped putting those little pills in your mouth. you know what you have to do. most of us have been though the withdrawls more than once or twice or even three times. i think i scared this kid on the forum the other day talking about big brother. i hope not. it was really in jest, because most of us have been to places no one else in their right mind would go. i hope your children are well. let us know how it goes. you can always bend the ears to let out that awful frustration of drugs. i care. ava
what can i say but i truely love you guys-for the first time in my life i found unconditional love and there are no words-thank you for just begin there.i never knew how much it would make a difference in my outlook on life but it has laura
You can e-mail me at any time, if you want i can e-mail you back, or not? I am also in trouble with the nursing board, and I"m currently having a pretty rough time of things too, i often have the feeling of "why bother". well hope to hear from you my e-mail is ***@****.
You can email me anytime sweetie.
***@****
I'm a mess myself, but i have a great ear and a bunch of experience in all this opiate ****.
Also, no, i doubt very seriously that you've done any permanent damage to yourself.
Your neurotransmitters just need to be awaken again, then they will function perfectly, i'm told.
It can take up to 6-months, but it will happen!
Good luck!
Lv Jenny
***@****
I'm a mess myself, but i have a great ear and a bunch of experience in all this opiate ****.
Also, no, i doubt very seriously that you've done any permanent damage to yourself.
Your neurotransmitters just need to be awaken again, then they will function perfectly, i'm told.
It can take up to 6-months, but it will happen!
Good luck!
Lv Jenny
Hang on to something. If it can be you children, let it be. If it is God, let it be. If you cannot find anything, let it be this forum. We are greater as a whole than any one of us alone.
You are not alone. Go to the therapist. You probably will find help and empathy. I used to think things like that about my ex when we first got together. That was almost 15 years ago. My, my, I cannot believe we've been with each other so long. Just hang on to something you really believe in, and you are just as qualified to post to help another as I am. Through helping, we receive help. I sound like Saint Francis of Assisi. He is my favorite Saint. You will make it if you find some strength. It is within you.
You are not alone. Go to the therapist. You probably will find help and empathy. I used to think things like that about my ex when we first got together. That was almost 15 years ago. My, my, I cannot believe we've been with each other so long. Just hang on to something you really believe in, and you are just as qualified to post to help another as I am. Through helping, we receive help. I sound like Saint Francis of Assisi. He is my favorite Saint. You will make it if you find some strength. It is within you.
Good luck "meagain" I really hope things go ok with you hun.
Id advise you but whats the point when I dont take up on my own advice. My thoughts and prayers are with you darling. Take care.
I just wish I could distract myself like you can, you obviously have the will power so you are on the right road and will carry on until youve got to the end and your smiling.
Not in the greatest of moods again, im paranoid, having period cramps and cant stop crying I feels its finally taken over me and I cant fight it anymore. Im obsessed with my partner being unfaithful yet I know he isnt. ( I know stupid isnt it) I just feel hes gonna leave me cause of the state of me. Im a mess and feel like ive finally gone mental.
Im sorry im going to go as theres more important people who need advice and are going through alot more than I am.
Take care all
Will post later
shaz xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Id advise you but whats the point when I dont take up on my own advice. My thoughts and prayers are with you darling. Take care.
I just wish I could distract myself like you can, you obviously have the will power so you are on the right road and will carry on until youve got to the end and your smiling.
Not in the greatest of moods again, im paranoid, having period cramps and cant stop crying I feels its finally taken over me and I cant fight it anymore. Im obsessed with my partner being unfaithful yet I know he isnt. ( I know stupid isnt it) I just feel hes gonna leave me cause of the state of me. Im a mess and feel like ive finally gone mental.
Im sorry im going to go as theres more important people who need advice and are going through alot more than I am.
Take care all
Will post later
shaz xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Meagin you are also welcome to email me, as is anyone.
***@****
And for the record, even though your question was not addressed to me...it is not pointless to stop. There is always hope, no matter what. There are ways to regulate brain chemistry, through the right medication, through nutrional supplements, through meditation..there is a lot you can do. Don't let the Dragon coax you into believing that it is pointless to stop. Never give up, no matter what. Keep reaching.
love,
WW
***@****
And for the record, even though your question was not addressed to me...it is not pointless to stop. There is always hope, no matter what. There are ways to regulate brain chemistry, through the right medication, through nutrional supplements, through meditation..there is a lot you can do. Don't let the Dragon coax you into believing that it is pointless to stop. Never give up, no matter what. Keep reaching.
love,
WW
Post anytime at: ***@****
I'm moving next week to Atlanta and will have a new address. Will post it here.
Best,
Francois
I'm moving next week to Atlanta and will have a new address. Will post it here.
Best,
Francois
If you like email me at ***@**** I check it often. I might be of some help. I also got into trouble with the nursing board. But luckly my ex is not into reading my posts or private papers.
Do not get desperate. Your husband has his own faults. Men are just more secretive than women.
email if you want. It would be welcomed. ava
Do not get desperate. Your husband has his own faults. Men are just more secretive than women.
email if you want. It would be welcomed. ava
i was wondering-i was wondering if someone would be willing to talk to me one-to one.i would never just barge in on the email address people post without on ok from its owner-its just that my husband has found this site-not hard i admit because its on my toolbar with the title mine and now he isinto my bussiness-he is the type who will take something that is very personal and painful and use it against you in a fight- or to "JUST TEASE" as he says.lately i feel the need for a confession and at the na meetings it is just too hard- i cant believe some of the things ive done and just now am thinking about as well as the painful things that started me using in the 1st place- the memories ive been trying to numb out.IF not thats ok but if oks with anyone ....I am also afraid of a public confession as i worry about my nursing licence. also MRMICHAEL i have a question and i need an honest answer which i know u would give and not spare my feelings...its is it too late? do u think that perment chemical changes have occured to my brain ived used 80-160 mg oxy for 3 yrs with perc thrown in for measure.wait thats wrong its been 10-20 40mg oxy a day chewed so its 400-800 mg right ? did iv drugs but that was years ago,small amount of pot,coke,few hits mesc,fewer acid,short run of cokemaybe 6months 8 yrs ago. do you think that even if i was to stop it would matter or have i destoyed beyond repair my brain chemistry.(i never could spell even as a child but i am more confused now,had a few seziures 2nd to my medical problems-even before i started the drugd. do you think its pointless to quit? also to anyone who might know the answer- how do u get on the LIST OF SEEKERS and how do u find out if you are- i did get busted when my insurance company sent a list of my meds to my docs but they still pay for my scripts without question-of course not all my rxs are on insurance thanks for any help anyone can offer laura
i;ve had doctors tell me opiates are the most difficult addiction to kick. it is the cravings. we all get them. do not go without your tegretol for too long. you might have another seizure. if it is causing problems, go back to the neurologist.
i do not recommend methadone to anyone. it is not easy to quit. people get hooked up for a long time. just because i have not in my two times on the program, does not mean it is for others. there are new ways. maybe they need to stretch out the buprenex for a little longer. be prepared for using dreams. i've only had one on the methadone. but when i kicked by myself twice off K4's, i had them all the times.
going to a meeting is a good thing to do. i need to go more myself. as i said, they accept me with my use of methadone. most are glad to see that i am alive.
good luck my friend. better days will come. ava
i do not recommend methadone to anyone. it is not easy to quit. people get hooked up for a long time. just because i have not in my two times on the program, does not mean it is for others. there are new ways. maybe they need to stretch out the buprenex for a little longer. be prepared for using dreams. i've only had one on the methadone. but when i kicked by myself twice off K4's, i had them all the times.
going to a meeting is a good thing to do. i need to go more myself. as i said, they accept me with my use of methadone. most are glad to see that i am alive.
good luck my friend. better days will come. ava
Hi everyone. It's good to see so many people helping newcomers. I was going to post yesterday but was in such a rotten mood, I couldn't think of anything positive that would help anyone. I had my first cravings and was full of nervous energy, couldn't sit still, just wanted a pill. Thankfully I didn't have access to any and decided to distract myself and try to get some natural endorphins going. It worked (played basketball till I was exhausted) but really scared me.
I had just switched my seizure med to Tegretol and wonder if that was bothering me, as I couldn't sleep either. I didn't take it today.
Anyone have tips on dealing with the cravings, which I naively thought I wouldn't have? I'm ok today, but sure it will come back. My husband still doesn't understand why I want to go to a meeting, which I haven't done yet.
Shaz, I hope you are better. This depression stuff sucks. Distraction is the only thing that works for me. I'll sign off so I'm not such a bummer! tlk
I had just switched my seizure med to Tegretol and wonder if that was bothering me, as I couldn't sleep either. I didn't take it today.
Anyone have tips on dealing with the cravings, which I naively thought I wouldn't have? I'm ok today, but sure it will come back. My husband still doesn't understand why I want to go to a meeting, which I haven't done yet.
Shaz, I hope you are better. This depression stuff sucks. Distraction is the only thing that works for me. I'll sign off so I'm not such a bummer! tlk
Yea, Sorry to about your Queen Mother dying, but she lead a long life. The weather on the Gulf Coast is in the 80's during the day and high 60's to low 70's at night. The water is warming up for great fishing and hopefully a good shrimp season. We belong to the local country club. It is on the water with good fishing, boat launches, and 3 wonderful pools. We get the gulf breeze so it is nice and inviting. Good Luck with the next week. Keep us posted and keep on posting. I enjoy communicating with you.
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