Teens and chemical abuse

[lifelessons]

What is the underlying cause of teens relying on chemicals instead of talking things out?  Is it peer pressure to use and be quiet about it?  Is it a failure to feel loved by parents, society, etc.?  I have been trying for two years to get my son to see his choices are leading him to an early death, he is now 18 and I worry that he will overuse a chemical and not intentionally cause himself death but that I will not be able to wake him up one day.  Found an empty bottle of generic NyQuil in my trash with two measuring cups.  I asked him how much he took.  I called poison control and short of hogtying him and taking him to the ER how can I get him help.  I know he is asking for help but I am not equipped to help him, only thing I know of to do is tough love and would like to help him before I put him out.  Would appreciate your views.

[lifelessons]

Thank you for the insight.  He does not see his behavior as dangerous.  Sunday night he and his friends were acting strange so I said the friends had to leave.  I could tell my son had taken something, all I smelled was alcohol but saw no bottles.  I was upstairs.  I try to let him have friends in with the understanding no chemicals are allowed.  I don't even have the medications I am suppose to have in the house because he has stolen them.  He went to bed.  I went to throw something in the garbage and found an empty bottle of generic NyQuil with two measuring cups.  I didn't know what to do, but I didn't sleep all that night.  I heard him get up and vomit.  It hurts to have to sit back and listen to him get sick from something stupid.  When I asked him about it the next day he just laughed.  I went to the ER, asked some questions, they had me call poison control and they told me what to expect.  The worst they would get short term was lots of sleep and possible hallucinations from the diphenhydramine.  When my son and I talked he said that's what they were going for was the hallucinations.  I don't understand why that is exciting.  They don't have anything else to do, no job yet they find money for things.  I don't give him money because I know he will buy drugs with it.  He does not see this behavior as dangerous.  I don't want to find him dead at some point.  It hurts like hell to watch him struggle.  But I cannot put him out, not yet.  He has plans to travel.  He's a smart young man and I hate seeing him put himself through all this torment.  He will not come here I can guarantee it, but I appreciate the opportunity to talk with others about this.  He said he didn't like it so perhaps he will not do it again.  I hope and pray he will wake up soon before he kills himself or causes himself brain damage.  

The odd thing is the people telling me to put him out are medical professionals.  I just don't have the heart, I love him too much.  Thanks for the comments.

[RelaxTheMind]

This is a good place to get some insight into your sons use. I did admissions at an inpatient substance abuse treatment center for teens for 3 years. Additionally, I have habituated myself to a pain med (tramadol) within the past 2 years and went up to 30 pills per day. On Thanksgiving I tapered down to 4 per day. I may be able to offer you some info.

Relying on chemicals might have nothing to do with a problem your son has. He may not have anything to talk out, like you say. Experimenting with a drug will lead to more experimenting. At some point we realize what we are taking make us feel kinda good and different inside. With me, vicodin and tramadol make feel at ease, less anxious, and energized. It has nothing to do with how others are treating me, loving me, peer pressure, or my home life. We are all different though. Admitting kids to the center, I was told that NyQuil creates quite a buzz. Same with the cold med Coricidin (Triple C). There are web sites that will tell a teen how much cold med to take to get high but not die. How do you like that!? Sad, sad, sad.

Here's an idea. If he's receptive to learning and a little open-minded. Send him over here to read all about our stories. Most of us began our use quite innocently; but drugs quickly spiral out of control and before you even realize it, you're addicted. If he'll read this stuff he may think twice before he gets in over his head for too long and make his drugs use a lifestyle --like it is for us. Our life revolves around our drug.

My opinion about "putting him out" is to not do it. Some addicts will get worse with this kind of treatment. Support, understanding, caring, and not being judgemental will take you far in dealing with him and his use.

Good luck to you, keep us posted and let us know if there's anything we can help with.

[Babanker07]

Hello, and welcome to the forum:)  I wanted to ask you, you said your son does want help correct?  Have you tried to get him onto this forum as a start?  There are plenty of great people here who have been through a plethora of addictions, and if he were to post his questions, guaranteed he would have some answers today, just a thought, have a great day:)

[anotherfinemess1]

There are a myriad of reasons why kids do drugs.  First, the accessibility is astounding these days, not just for illicit drugs, but for all the "legal" stuff like adderall, pain pills, and all the over the counter stuff that gets abused.  Kids are so much more sophisticated these days then we were at their age-  not only do they mature sooner, but they've got the internet-- big factor.
Some kids turn to drugs to escape their problems-- from normal teenage angst to problems in the home.  Remember when we were kids and got in fights, we'd either throw punches or, at worst, throw rocks.   Now, its just as "normal" to pull out a knife or a gun.  It's a different world with a different set of rules. I also think that many kids start out innocently enough with a substance-- just trying it due to curiousity or peer pressure, and then get hooked.  And for some, like you said, it is a "cry for help".  You know him better than anyone, you may be more "equpped to help him" than anyone.  Of course, if he is 18, your say in the matter may be limited. You might try arranging for him to see a counselor/therapist to get to the underlying reasons.  best of luck to you.