Thank you...

[this_big]

I've been coming to MH for quite a few years now. I've seen a lot of people come and go. And quite a few still here from day one when I stumbled on this site by pure chance. I was broke busted and disgusted. Scared as hell? Never used a forum before and had to google what a thread was.I've made friends that I've stayed in contact off this site and on. Some still clean some not. Some who have disappeared that I think of and pray for often. This forum and the members have literally I believe saved my life..on several occasions.

The news of IBK got me thinkin. I wonder if people really know the impact we have on each others lives. I didn't know Bonnie personally.. Hell I didn't even know her name was Bonnie till yesterday. But that woman, a complete stranger has had a huge impact on my life. Even after I'd relapse and be actively useing some of her words would ring in my ears. Hers and many others. It has always led me back here. I've never been saddened by the death of someone I never met. My heart has been heavy since I read that post yesterday. I wish I could have said thank you.  I'm sure I did over the years, but I know I never actually said your one of the reasons im still fighting. Tomorrow is never promised, and I have no idea what my future holds and wanted to say thank you to a couple people that have been by side since day one finding this place.

Dominosarah..You probably don't remember a couple years ago when my ex left me and I came here a complete mess. A train wreck! You reached out in a PM in an attempt to calm me down. What you didn't know...and I'm ashamed to admit it, but I had a pistol on my lap. I was at that point. After reading your message I had my brother come get all my guns. Thank you for your continued support over the years and your commitment to this community. You really have no idea how greatful I am for you.

Laurel.. Thanks for always checkin in on me. You always popped up when I was feeling lonely and your encouragement to "keep walking" has gotten me through some ****! Has anyone heard from her? I see she hasn't been on in a while.

Gnarly
Gizzy..where ever you may be brother, I hope you're still fighting. I pray for you often
Theres so many others..

And all the "newer" people Thank You!! I hope to stick around this time and be able to give back. I literally owe my life to you guys.

[dedicatedtostop]

Such a Beautiful post!! You took the words right out of my mouth! You NEVER  ever know what someone else is going through! I always try to smile at a stranger, you just never know. IBK done the same for me! I pray I can be half the person she was!... Leave even half the legacy! I am with Sarah.. I am wiping back the tears!
Absolutely Breathtakingly Beautiful post!!

-- Ashley

[Danny111]

Very thoughtful post.

[dominosarah]

I am so touched by your comments.  I need to compile my thoughts and wipe these tears.  I am so grateful you are here~  sara

[Krissy_123]

Ya same here.my quit date was November 21st 2014 and IBK was there for me too. I also didn't no her name was Bonnie until I read Sara's heartbreaking post yesterday. Also another women that's been there for me,along with gnarly. He's still here btw helping ppl. I saw you mention him in your post. I read your other post about how you wished you could go back when you thought fentanyl was the hard stuff. I remember starting on T1's and working my way up to the Oxys since 2003. I didn't go past the oxys but they were enough. I Had the suicidal thoughts atleast 10 times a day. Even planned on how do to that I knew would be successful. I feel sick just thinking About it. I would have missed my kids growing up,there graduation,their weddings, my grandkids. These 8 and half months clean have been the hardest of my life,but so worth it. I pray you find the power in you to quit and get back in to recovery. Remember if there is a bed in detox for you tomorrow it won't matter unless you're really ready to do this. We get to a point where we think this is it and I'm going to use until I die! But it doesn't have to be that way,I promise you!! It's hard fking work the hardest things you will ever ever do,but isn't your life worth it?? You only get one. Then it's over all to soon. Take care man,I hope things work out for you!! Krissy

[BearsFan1966]

What a wonderful post! Sarah is the best and for her to of saved your life I am sure she will be so grateful  to have done that! There are so many special people on here that have saved so many life's that I am sure they do not even know that they have! I hope all is going well for you and you are still fighting the good fight!