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The Disease Of Addicition
I have studied the effects of the disease of drug addiction. I give treatment and have received treatment for this deadly disease. I am eight years clean from having to worry where my next dose will come from. I have gone through all the miseries people write about on this forum. What puzzles me Doctor and readers, is why with all the help out there. Why do people refuse to get the help they need to put this horrible disease in check?
Why do people continue to do everything but correct thing! I see people on this forum joke and glorify their addicition. Is it simply because people or participants do not understand the seriousness and deadliness of this disease? Please respond doctor/readers.
My Best To All.. Danielincc
Why do people continue to do everything but correct thing! I see people on this forum joke and glorify their addicition. Is it simply because people or participants do not understand the seriousness and deadliness of this disease? Please respond doctor/readers.
My Best To All.. Danielincc
Okay Danielinnc,
I have read your posts several times and until now have kept silent as others have done so well in addressing your "concerns" with folks on this forum. First of all, if you are an addiction specialist as you claim to be, what's the deal? Slow day at work? You don't have enough to do there without trolling the net to save more of us? If you do indeed read this forum as you claim to you will notice that no one is refusing help. Many, myself included have been through treatment programs and participate in 12 step programs. Sometimes the road to being clean is not always a straight and narrow one and yeah not all of us are meant to make it even. But no one appreciates having their thinking corrected as you are attempting to do. Didn't your mamma ever tell you honey draws more flies than vinegar? If people's descriptions of their use offends you, skip their posts, don't try to make them" see the light". Jeezus, don't you think someone hasn't already tried to do that? Most of the people on this forum have a great deal of insight into their problems and struggles with addiction. I have been clean a few years now myself and haven't been one of those blessed folks I listen to in meetings who claim to have had all desire to use removed from them. I still miss it like you'd miss an old lover but I do stay clean and attempt to work a program. Seems I recall hearing in one of those rooms, "progress not perfection". We're addicts, for chissakes. What do you expect us to talk about? If you read this forum as you claim, then you would have noted some lively discussions about dogs, tupperware, music, books, family and many of the other good things in life. We are not one dimentional dope fiends. All are welcome on this forum Danielincc and I don't mean to alienate you but this forum has saved my heinie and the sanity of someone I love, whose posts no doubt are among those that offend you. But please don't judge, label us and condemn us or try to save us.
I have read your posts several times and until now have kept silent as others have done so well in addressing your "concerns" with folks on this forum. First of all, if you are an addiction specialist as you claim to be, what's the deal? Slow day at work? You don't have enough to do there without trolling the net to save more of us? If you do indeed read this forum as you claim to you will notice that no one is refusing help. Many, myself included have been through treatment programs and participate in 12 step programs. Sometimes the road to being clean is not always a straight and narrow one and yeah not all of us are meant to make it even. But no one appreciates having their thinking corrected as you are attempting to do. Didn't your mamma ever tell you honey draws more flies than vinegar? If people's descriptions of their use offends you, skip their posts, don't try to make them" see the light". Jeezus, don't you think someone hasn't already tried to do that? Most of the people on this forum have a great deal of insight into their problems and struggles with addiction. I have been clean a few years now myself and haven't been one of those blessed folks I listen to in meetings who claim to have had all desire to use removed from them. I still miss it like you'd miss an old lover but I do stay clean and attempt to work a program. Seems I recall hearing in one of those rooms, "progress not perfection". We're addicts, for chissakes. What do you expect us to talk about? If you read this forum as you claim, then you would have noted some lively discussions about dogs, tupperware, music, books, family and many of the other good things in life. We are not one dimentional dope fiends. All are welcome on this forum Danielincc and I don't mean to alienate you but this forum has saved my heinie and the sanity of someone I love, whose posts no doubt are among those that offend you. But please don't judge, label us and condemn us or try to save us.
Thanks for responding to my earlier question. My insight is probaly limited being as I haven't had to deal with the problems some people have had.I think one thing that isn't dealt with in the medical field is genetic predisposition to this problem of addiction. One day we may have the technology to run a scan (like in Star Trek) and be able to assess a person as a whole. That to me is the biggest down fall in medicine today. Is the lack of interaction amongst dr.s in the well-being of a patients TOTAL well being. How many times have you been sent to a "specialist" only to find your p.c. hasn't heard anything, doesn't know anything.Plus you have a lot of dr.s that forgot the Hippocratic oath. They're in it for the money, the nice, car, the nice home...Which don't get me wrong, I believe that is their right, IF they are good dr.s. Nowadays it's seems you have to scratch and fight to get good health care.And you have to know alot about medicine and things just to protect yourself. And the pharmaceutical companies today don't always seem to have our best interest at heart. Just watch t.v. and all the class action law suits going on today. The makers of Baycol, so they'll have to pay out a few million for the 30 people they killed. How many millions of dollars did that company make? I believe they need to go back to doing more long-term studies on these drugs. Before they are put into the mouths of people to make a profit.I'm all for trying to help people but jee wiz, could you imagine someone you love dying that way. But I do see this forum as a type of therapy. And sometimes 45 min. twice a month at a mental health facility isn't cuttin' it.Here you get empathy and sympathy that some of of us aren't getting in our everyday life. I feel this forum serves a function and purpose for all.Now here is another little saying that puts my life into perspective-"If you know all the answers, you probaly misunderstood the question." Sincerely, Shotsy
I am simply saying treat this disease as you would any other killer disease. I see nothing wrong with sharing your ups and downs on this forum. It's good to share these feelings with supportive people. But for the sake of goodness don't tempt fate by continuing to abuse the substances that will eventually kill you. If a person is suffering from chronic pain, at least try and treat the pain by not abusing the very substance that stops the pain. Abusing these substnces defeats the purpose of pain control. I have lost close friends to drug abuse. And I will not SUGAR COAT my thoughts on this matter. I have a right to speak my mind here just as everyone else. I am only hoping to help someone "see the light" that takes this killer disease lightly.
Sincere Best Wishes,
Danielincc
Sincere Best Wishes,
Danielincc
What exactly is this killer disease we're talking about here? I read this forum daily and hear from lots of people taking meds for pain. And struggling to lead normal lives. What are they supposed to do? Lay in bed and suffer? Exactly how does a narcotic kill you, short of an overdoese? I will admit the tylenol might be hard on the liver but there are probably formulations without it. I don't know. I don't use pain meds, except rarely for pain. I take benzos for anxiety and insomnia. And I like them. They work. I can act like a normal person. So guess I'm an addict and am in the process of killing myself. In my younger years, I abused drugs (it was the 60's) and alcohol and went to AA which was a creepy experience to be quite honest. Program was okay, if anyone can ever get thru all 12 steps, but the people were like aliens. I had one woman I had seen one time in my life at a meeting come up to me in a crowded gym and start going on and on about "how you know we do this," and "we always do that." Can you say anonymity? I felt like I was in a cult. I only talked to program people about the program all the time when I wasn't reading the Big Book. I actually got worse, not drugwise - I was clean, but psychologically. There was a real emotional investment in "how bad I was," and "how much my life has improved in all these healty acceptable ways." I mean come on people, lighten up. JMHO. "But I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now." Incidentally, my father was an alcoholic who died at 86. Of lung cancer. Different killer addiction, I guess. I'm a risk junkie myself. There's a real killer addiction for you. Been thinking of joining the army and volunteering for Afghan.
It seems to me you have suffered a great truama with this problem. And I respectfully understand your postion. I believe all the people here in some form or fashion are dealing with their problems. You just have to read between the lines. Respectfully,Shotsy
most of us who contribute our opinion to the issue of using first share our own story of addiction with the forum -- no sugarcoating, either. If you want credibility here, start by giving us your "credentials," and I don't mean your license to work as an addiction councellor. So, you understand us, know where we've been and where we're at? --Then prove it. Let's hear your story and please make it the R-rated version.
Thomas
Thomas
danny:
i think irishrose posed a good question which you have failed to
answer, "slow day at the treatment center." i do not speak for anyone else on this forum. i do have the right to speak for myself (or is that just reserved for "addiction specialist?")
you will have to pardon some of us for not swooning at your feet
and begging for you to "correct" our thinking. When I first got
clean back in 1978, people with caustic attitudes and little re-
guard for others feelings were delt with in a more direct and physical manner at the AA meetings I attended. see danny-boy, i had the privildge of being exsposed to some real honest to goodness founding fathers of AA. i will never really know for sure, but i bet a few of them would have straightened your pompious attitude and blatant disreguard of other people's feelings.
danny-boy do you really think your the only one that has lost
friends to this disease of addiction? Do you believe that all the
rest of us folks are too stupid to realise what deadly malady this illness is?
danny boy, i could go on and on about how i "feel" about you. my
feelings are quite insignifcat. what i will do for you though, is
pray for you!! i will ask god as understand him, to bring you a
little loving acceptance of other people with the disease of ad-
diction. maybe you won't be such a lonely and angry person. to
sum it all up danny-boy, i'm going to love and care about you no
matter what, and you won't be able to do one damm thing about!
kip
i think irishrose posed a good question which you have failed to
answer, "slow day at the treatment center." i do not speak for anyone else on this forum. i do have the right to speak for myself (or is that just reserved for "addiction specialist?")
you will have to pardon some of us for not swooning at your feet
and begging for you to "correct" our thinking. When I first got
clean back in 1978, people with caustic attitudes and little re-
guard for others feelings were delt with in a more direct and physical manner at the AA meetings I attended. see danny-boy, i had the privildge of being exsposed to some real honest to goodness founding fathers of AA. i will never really know for sure, but i bet a few of them would have straightened your pompious attitude and blatant disreguard of other people's feelings.
danny-boy do you really think your the only one that has lost
friends to this disease of addiction? Do you believe that all the
rest of us folks are too stupid to realise what deadly malady this illness is?
danny boy, i could go on and on about how i "feel" about you. my
feelings are quite insignifcat. what i will do for you though, is
pray for you!! i will ask god as understand him, to bring you a
little loving acceptance of other people with the disease of ad-
diction. maybe you won't be such a lonely and angry person. to
sum it all up danny-boy, i'm going to love and care about you no
matter what, and you won't be able to do one damm thing about!
kip
I am going to have to agree with every person that has responed to you,,,you have never once came to this forum and offered encouragement and support to those still suffering...all you have done is display your anger towards those people that are suffering from addiction,,,Perhaps you are frustrated. but,,,you can't save the world,,,how do you know these people here are not trying to get help or are in treatment..I don't know of anyone that glorifies durg use here..sure ,,,people do admit they like the way the drugs made them feel,,,why the hell would we have started using in the first place. then there are those of us that were in treatment that have been "clean" but..have to take narcotics of various kinds for various reasons....long term and then we become "involuntarily" dependant on the drugs...which long term pain management with narcotics will do,,,,to anyone whether they are an addict or not.....noone here should be judged...so many people that come here do so asking for help,,,so why do you feel that they are not doing what they need to do? so many other people that are in recovery or are trying to get there ask for alternative pain meds instead of the narcs...so they are damned if they do and damned if they don"t when you were in treatment did your counselors work with you on your control issues? we don't need people telling us what to do most of us know what do to,,,,what we need is support, encouragement, perhaps guidance for those seeking help...not coming in here blasting people because you don't think they want help......they wouldn't be here if they didn't want help unless they are here offering what you should be offering I was loved back to life 12 years ago,,,are you capable of doing that? support, encouragement and loving ? we here on this forum are capable of doing that....along with sharing our experience, strength and hope and I will be along side of kip when he cares about you and loves you and there is nothing you can do about it......love to all cin
Where do I start with you. Hey you asked for it. I was at my wits end when I came to this forum. I had called 2 hospital programs for addiction called one addiction specialist. Then I got real desperate called NA was given two numbers one out of service the other with no one there who spoke english what was my problem? Ultram addiction!!! All of those I called had never heard of Ultram or told me they were unable to help me. I also called and left a message for a specialist who never even bothered to call back. I made it to this forum and found many others who had been through the same thing and had great ideas to help me quit. So guess what the professionals don't always have what it takes.
I totally agree with Thomas that you should share your story. I truly don't understand what brings you here and what makes you constantly criticize us. There is no one formula that works for all addicts and if this forum has helped even one person then it has served its purpose however I know it has helped many. Why don't you read down to Beths post and look at her picture I have so much more to say to you but my sone is crawling on me wanting Thomas the tank engine on the computer.
I totally agree with Thomas that you should share your story. I truly don't understand what brings you here and what makes you constantly criticize us. There is no one formula that works for all addicts and if this forum has helped even one person then it has served its purpose however I know it has helped many. Why don't you read down to Beths post and look at her picture I have so much more to say to you but my sone is crawling on me wanting Thomas the tank engine on the computer.
My first question to you is.....how long did you struggle with your addiction before you got help? You seem to think that we should drop what we're doing and rush to a NA meeting. As far as the joking goes....I'd advise you to skip over the posts if you don't like what you read. I know I'm addicted to opiates and there are some days I come here looking for someone to make me laugh. Durings my darkest days, I came here in tears and leave with a smile on my face.There are tons of people in the USA that are overweight. Everyone knows that diet and exercise are the proper way to lose weight.....and yet.....obesity is still a problem. My point here is.....you think you have all the answers...but I don't hear anyone asking you any questions. Are you sure this is the right forum for you? You don't seem too popular here.
Daniel, you truly puzzle me.
I don't know that I believe that you actually have a degree or training in Therapy of any sort. If you did, you'd know the first tenet...that judgement, and assumptions, do not a therapeutic relationship make.
How dare you assume that the people here are not willing to do what it takes to treat their addiction? How dare you believe that you know the only way?
I'm really tired of trying to be respectful of you. You constantly go out of your way to belittle folks here. These folks saved me from the pits of despair. I'm coming up on 2 months clean because of the wonderful people here, who did not judge me or tell me what I had to do. They just simply cared about me.
Yeah yeah, I'm also in therapy, and I"m a therapist myself. Go ahead and do your best to discredit me like you tried to before.
But please, stop taking our inventories for us, and work your own program.
WW
I don't know that I believe that you actually have a degree or training in Therapy of any sort. If you did, you'd know the first tenet...that judgement, and assumptions, do not a therapeutic relationship make.
How dare you assume that the people here are not willing to do what it takes to treat their addiction? How dare you believe that you know the only way?
I'm really tired of trying to be respectful of you. You constantly go out of your way to belittle folks here. These folks saved me from the pits of despair. I'm coming up on 2 months clean because of the wonderful people here, who did not judge me or tell me what I had to do. They just simply cared about me.
Yeah yeah, I'm also in therapy, and I"m a therapist myself. Go ahead and do your best to discredit me like you tried to before.
But please, stop taking our inventories for us, and work your own program.
WW
Tell us your story. You'll never find a kinder, more understanding and supportive group of folks than right here on this forum. Tell it all -- the addoction, the anger, the rage -- if you're honest, we can handle it. I think you'll be surprised by the reactions you get. - Li'l Milo
Hey Kristen... are you still reading the forum?
I've just been wondering how you are doing, and missing your words, and hoping that you are ok.
Just thought I'd check in.
love,
WW
I've just been wondering how you are doing, and missing your words, and hoping that you are ok.
Just thought I'd check in.
love,
WW
dannyboy (or is it dock-boy danny):
well cogratulations, you sure "pulled one over on a few of us at
the forum! before you get your toes too curled up, i'ld just like
to add, that many people have got one over on old kip here. to be
pefectly honest many people will in the future will get one over on old kip! this is the consequences one must pay for honesty. when i speak of honesty please don't confuse it with cash register honesty, or never lied to a cop, MD, or parole officer honesty. i'm talking about the kind of honesty that allows me to bare the "dirty little secrets" that kept me stoned for days, weeks, years.... I'm talking about the kind of honesty that allows me to (at least at this forum) show you things in or about old kip here that he never could before with out fear of others judgement.
i can tell you dannyboy, that i love and care about you, and there isn't a damm thing you can do about it. how does that make you feel to hear that danny boy? does it make you fear something? the first time i was told that it scared the **** out of me. why? because i wasn't able to return that kind of concern to another human being, let alone a fellow addict. i didn't feel worthy of
anyone's respect or love. i mistrusted anyone who didn't treat me
like the piece of dirt **** i knew i was.
well dannyboy things have changed, at least for old kip here! see
i've been able to clean up my hand enough to see that it all be-
gins with learning how to love yourself---everthing about your-
self. yeah, all the good and bad **** about yourself. see until
you can do that, you won't have any repect, not from yourself or
anyone else.
How 'bout it dan? can you show us folks here at this forum some-
thing real about dan? can you show us something of yourself that you have never shown another human being? can you? well you know the answer to that, not me. if you can't do this dan, you truly
deserve my pity, because you sure don't deserve my respect!!!
there is an angel that would love to be on your shoulder!
kip
well cogratulations, you sure "pulled one over on a few of us at
the forum! before you get your toes too curled up, i'ld just like
to add, that many people have got one over on old kip here. to be
pefectly honest many people will in the future will get one over on old kip! this is the consequences one must pay for honesty. when i speak of honesty please don't confuse it with cash register honesty, or never lied to a cop, MD, or parole officer honesty. i'm talking about the kind of honesty that allows me to bare the "dirty little secrets" that kept me stoned for days, weeks, years.... I'm talking about the kind of honesty that allows me to (at least at this forum) show you things in or about old kip here that he never could before with out fear of others judgement.
i can tell you dannyboy, that i love and care about you, and there isn't a damm thing you can do about it. how does that make you feel to hear that danny boy? does it make you fear something? the first time i was told that it scared the **** out of me. why? because i wasn't able to return that kind of concern to another human being, let alone a fellow addict. i didn't feel worthy of
anyone's respect or love. i mistrusted anyone who didn't treat me
like the piece of dirt **** i knew i was.
well dannyboy things have changed, at least for old kip here! see
i've been able to clean up my hand enough to see that it all be-
gins with learning how to love yourself---everthing about your-
self. yeah, all the good and bad **** about yourself. see until
you can do that, you won't have any repect, not from yourself or
anyone else.
How 'bout it dan? can you show us folks here at this forum some-
thing real about dan? can you show us something of yourself that you have never shown another human being? can you? well you know the answer to that, not me. if you can't do this dan, you truly
deserve my pity, because you sure don't deserve my respect!!!
there is an angel that would love to be on your shoulder!
kip
Well said my friend hey BTW I enjoyed the phone conversation with you and yours you guys are way cool and great people love you both cin
You guys hijacked Dopey Dan's thread!!! With any luck...he'll get mad enough to stay the hell away from here. I'm gonna double hijack it....we bar-b-qued tonight......ummmmmm.....I washed my car today......
Oh well.....I tried.
Man, he's a jackass. I think I may have dated him at one time....during my drinking days, when I didn't know **** from wild honey.
On a serious note...Thomas? You haven't answered my emails....have I offended you? I hope not! Still buddies?
Cindi!!!! You crack me up! Smack me on the ass and call me Sally! I love it! I'm gonna use that next chance I get....maybe someone will take me up on it!! LOL LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Oh well.....I tried.
Man, he's a jackass. I think I may have dated him at one time....during my drinking days, when I didn't know **** from wild honey.
On a serious note...Thomas? You haven't answered my emails....have I offended you? I hope not! Still buddies?
Cindi!!!! You crack me up! Smack me on the ass and call me Sally! I love it! I'm gonna use that next chance I get....maybe someone will take me up on it!! LOL LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well Thomas...our dear friend Daniel is a bit of cliche.
There are several formally named defensive structures that fit his behavior. But what you are referring to is, if I"m not mistaken, called "projective identification". That is where someone unconciously projects the stuff about themselves that they don't want to admit to on to other people and then criticizes it to no end.
But what it comes down to in normal language is lack of compassion rooted in fear.
I tried to be kind and at least unruffled in my responses to him in the past, but I have my limits! Good Goddess he's a piece of work!
I've got my stuff, lord knows I'm as neurotic as anyone, so I'm not pretending to be better than Dan or anyone. I do like to think that I at least own up to my stumbling blocks.
oi!
my love to you Thomas...hope you are doing ok, and I"m sorry to hear that you had to endure withdrawals yet again!
WW
There are several formally named defensive structures that fit his behavior. But what you are referring to is, if I"m not mistaken, called "projective identification". That is where someone unconciously projects the stuff about themselves that they don't want to admit to on to other people and then criticizes it to no end.
But what it comes down to in normal language is lack of compassion rooted in fear.
I tried to be kind and at least unruffled in my responses to him in the past, but I have my limits! Good Goddess he's a piece of work!
I've got my stuff, lord knows I'm as neurotic as anyone, so I'm not pretending to be better than Dan or anyone. I do like to think that I at least own up to my stumbling blocks.
oi!
my love to you Thomas...hope you are doing ok, and I"m sorry to hear that you had to endure withdrawals yet again!
WW
Well Thomas...our dear friend Daniel is a bit of cliche.
There are several formally named defensive structures that fit his behavior. But what you are referring to is, if I"m not mistaken, called "projective identification". That is where someone unconciously projects the stuff about themselves that they don't want to admit to on to other people and then criticizes it to no end.
But what it comes down to in normal language is lack of compassion rooted in fear.
I tried to be kind and at least unruffled in my responses to him in the past, but I have my limits! Good Goddess he's a piece of work!
I've got my stuff, lord knows I'm as neurotic as anyone, so I'm not pretending to be better than Dan or anyone. I do like to think that I at least own up to my stumbling blocks.
oi!
my love to you Thomas...hope you are doing ok, and I"m sorry to hear that you had to endure withdrawals yet again!
Shotsy, I don't think you need to apologize for giving folks the benefit of the doubt. I'd rather be open to all, and get burned a few times, than be closed and hard hearted. Yeah, you may pay a high price a time or two, but the rewards of the wonderful folks that you connect with outweight the risks, in my view.
lots of love,
WW
There are several formally named defensive structures that fit his behavior. But what you are referring to is, if I"m not mistaken, called "projective identification". That is where someone unconciously projects the stuff about themselves that they don't want to admit to on to other people and then criticizes it to no end.
But what it comes down to in normal language is lack of compassion rooted in fear.
I tried to be kind and at least unruffled in my responses to him in the past, but I have my limits! Good Goddess he's a piece of work!
I've got my stuff, lord knows I'm as neurotic as anyone, so I'm not pretending to be better than Dan or anyone. I do like to think that I at least own up to my stumbling blocks.
oi!
my love to you Thomas...hope you are doing ok, and I"m sorry to hear that you had to endure withdrawals yet again!
Shotsy, I don't think you need to apologize for giving folks the benefit of the doubt. I'd rather be open to all, and get burned a few times, than be closed and hard hearted. Yeah, you may pay a high price a time or two, but the rewards of the wonderful folks that you connect with outweight the risks, in my view.
lots of love,
WW
WW - Hi my friend I havent really written to you recently and reading that it has been 2 months already kind of suprised me. You really are the WOMAN!!! I am so so so proud of you. I am so happy that you feel again that you love life and feel all the good around you. I had a ittle setback but will talk about it later you always give me tons of hope!!! Love you tons. Jules
Kristen - I was also wondering how you are please check in!!!
Kristen - I was also wondering how you are please check in!!!
<font face="arial" color="navy"> Daniel, I'll say what my friends here are too polite to say. You are not a therapist. You are not sober. You are a junkie like the rest of us. How do I know? Because I, along with many here, <i>have</i> been through the personal hell of getting clean and <b>because</b> it is <i>such</i> hell, it's not so easy to say "I'm gonna get clean today, period." The reason you asked is because you yourself are stuck in the shallow but endless cycle of being a user and YOU want to know why you can't just tackle it with ease, treat it as you would any other disease. Why not tell us your story and we'll try to help. But don't lie, don't cover. I can tell you right now you'll never come close to sobriety if you can't even admit to a bunch of faceless internet strangers that you have a problem.
I'm 6 months clean from a 12-20 vicodin a day habit. It was HARD to beat, but thanks to a God with endless mercy and Thomas who won't ever lose faith in any of us enough to stop posting his detox recipe, I did it. You can too, but frist you gotta start talking.
I'm 6 months clean from a 12-20 vicodin a day habit. It was HARD to beat, but thanks to a God with endless mercy and Thomas who won't ever lose faith in any of us enough to stop posting his detox recipe, I did it. You can too, but frist you gotta start talking.
Hi Jules!
It is not quite yet 2 months, but will be in a week and a half or so. I've kinda lost count of when the actual first day totally clean was, but I began my withdrawal week in mid August. I took a teeny amount of the meds for the first 4 or 5 nights of the withdrawal, like one pill and the last few night half a pill, so I count those as using days. Still, I've been clean for longer than I thought I could ever be. Some days I have cravings, some days I don't even think about it, but every day I practice gratitude for not being stuck in the hell of the 15 to 20 a day I had been taking. Every day I still marvel at how great it is to not be a slave to a pill every 5 hours just to feel normal, and avoid the sweating and the shakes.
My back pain has also gotten better over all. Somedays it still spikes up a bit, but not as bad as it used to, and most days it is tolerable if I take enough ibuprofen.
I really truly at one point believed that not only did I never want to quit the hydrocodone, but I didn't believe that I could..I was terrified of the hell of withdrawals, and now, remembering that hell is what helps me on the days where the Dragon whispers.
I thank the Goddess for each of you, and for guiding me to this site.
How are you doing Jules? I am here for you always..just ask.
love always,
WW
It is not quite yet 2 months, but will be in a week and a half or so. I've kinda lost count of when the actual first day totally clean was, but I began my withdrawal week in mid August. I took a teeny amount of the meds for the first 4 or 5 nights of the withdrawal, like one pill and the last few night half a pill, so I count those as using days. Still, I've been clean for longer than I thought I could ever be. Some days I have cravings, some days I don't even think about it, but every day I practice gratitude for not being stuck in the hell of the 15 to 20 a day I had been taking. Every day I still marvel at how great it is to not be a slave to a pill every 5 hours just to feel normal, and avoid the sweating and the shakes.
My back pain has also gotten better over all. Somedays it still spikes up a bit, but not as bad as it used to, and most days it is tolerable if I take enough ibuprofen.
I really truly at one point believed that not only did I never want to quit the hydrocodone, but I didn't believe that I could..I was terrified of the hell of withdrawals, and now, remembering that hell is what helps me on the days where the Dragon whispers.
I thank the Goddess for each of you, and for guiding me to this site.
How are you doing Jules? I am here for you always..just ask.
love always,
WW
In case anyone has any doubts, Danielincc is none other than "Doc Dan" (his old address was danincc). Dan's specialty is sanctimony. He's not the least interested in extending friendship or help to anyone on this forum. His goal is judgment and condemnation. Not surprising, considering that his posts are those of an angry, contemptuous, pitiful human being. This is strictly an ego-stroke for this guy. He feels superior to us and wants us to know it. I for one will not be reading any posts from him. They're all the same anyway.
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