I feel I could have written your words myself. The desperation of getting more and the things I would sacrifice. Just for a pill, I too just wandered onto this site. I am crying everyday reading it just because we are not alone blue iris, we are not alone. Keep in touch if you like creek
I don't know what to do...I've been taking them for a little over a year. I usually don't take more than 3 pills a day. I really want to stop, but I'm ashamed of it. I'm only 24 yrs old and a mother of a 7 year old. I work long hours and also go to school...I know I need help. Where can I go?
Mindy- When I read your response I burst into tears!! Thank you SO MUCH for offering me on-the-spot support! One thing that scares me most about coming off of HC is my total lack of a support system. I have many acquaintances, but no real solid friendships yet where I am now living. I am married, but my husband is regimented, straight as an arrow (never even tried pot, cigs, etc. as a teenager), and not at all available to me or supportive of the things I want/need/desire/dream of. I have never told him anything about my addiction problems, nor am I ready to take that plunge at this point in my life. I have 2 wonderful kids, both under 5yrs. old, and my family of origin is not/probably never will be a place to go for support of any kind. I want to be off the HC as I hate it's hold on me, the cost, and the desperate and risky stuff I do to get more. I want OUT of this stronghold, but I'm just not sure I can do it on my own, without supportive people to lean on when I need it. Sometimes I wonder if that's why I take the HC in the first place--to numb the pain of lonliness, and most likely to numb the pain of my troublesome childhood that makes me who I am today. Again, thank you for the info, and for your support...there is a new light shining the way for me...
Hi...I've only just stumbled upon this site, but I think the time is right...it's meant to be. I'm wondering how much clonidine the ER doc started you on (pill or patch?) and which vitamins you're taking? Is there anything else you're doing, like receiving support from someone or somewhere, other than this site? Thanks a bunch--I need all the help I can get at this point!
Take it one hour, one day at a time. It gets easier. I am a mom of a 7 yr old. You have to do this for you and you owe it to your kids to be fully present. Please don't think I'm lecturing, because I'm not. Just let me know if I can be of help to you!
Mindy
You're a winner. So look behind door number 3. Oh yes FREEDOM!
I think it is a good sign because two days ago I could barely eat or drink anything. I was so scared of the W/D, but I am so glad I did this. Tomorrow when I see my spine doc I will try to find other non-narcotic ways to treat my back. I still have about 300 of my vicoprofen left. I am going to keep it as a reminder of all the frickin pain from the last few days.