Here qwe go again

[cpdave]

Well I thought I had all the answers a while back I made it almost through day 4 and was doin good until my contact showed up to check on me.I turned down any help lol then my addict brain talked me into it and I was off again.Oh by the way I was doin as much oxy as I could get I'm talkin stupid amounts anyhow as of this afternoon I was on day 2 and had a plan se my contact is my bestfriend so I was gonna fess up about my use he thinks I sell the majority of what I get from him but to my surprise he offered me some tabs and like an idiot I took some so now I'm back to day one.I'm discusted with myself I've kicked a lot of different crap in my time but this monkey is the worst.

[cpdave]

I have made it more than a few days in the past but due to my job being so physically as well as mentally tuff I always go back but I guess the difference this time is what good is my job if I spend every dime on pills....lol its an oxymoron but nobody could have told me this I had to get my warped way of thinkin around it.Damn once and addict................everyone...lol

[Cissy373]

Don't beat yourself up, I've started over more times than I like to count but you need to check into some kind of aftercare.

Also you may have to find a new best friend.

Cissy

[NorcBgone]

Hang in there - I know its tough. I'm struggling to make it thru day 2 and that's usually my cut off in the past, but I'm determined to make it this time. Good luck to you!

[cpdave]

You are so right its the same circle same results.I always thought I could man up and just do it and at one time I probably could of I guess its because I keep beating myself up over my situation in general which the pills put me in this position makes me want to give up but my friend did say everytime u want to take a pill look at your daughter so we are back to day 1 and as excpected I'm misserable lol.Thanks for the support guys

[leeisgettingclean]

You are going to have to have your friend stay away for now. At the tender point you are at yuo need NO temptation--I think with temptation at this point your chances of staying clean are about 0. You do know the drill--you just have to get more active in your recovery--dont wait to start aftercare, start it now. Good luck, Lee

[avisg]

dave,
Well you no the drill It sounds like you need some recovery care aa.na addiction doctor something to help with the mental part ..You are going to need to brake ties with with your friends that use too.Hang in there you can do it.