Cocaine addiction and heart problems....

[Salene]

I found out that my husband has been using cocaine heavily for probably about 6 months.  He has been injecting.   I noticed a place where he stuck himself in his left arm swelled up as big as a golf ball the other day and got very red and gross looking.  I made him go to the minor med clinic and the sore is abcessed and very infected.  Believe me, it looks terrible!  ANyway, while he was there the doctor listened to his heart over and over and finally told him to go straight to the emergency room for more testing on his heart.  He has a heart murmur and "abdominal bruit".  She said he needed to be monitored for 24 to 48 hours and maybe even admitted.  I'm very concerned about this.  He never went to the ER, he said he was too scared. That makes no sense to me but....  I've done some research on the net about it searching for the words she put on his medical forms.  (I don't understand much of it and can't read her writing) but all pointed towards aortic aneurysm.  Am I being really paranoid?  He has a constant low grade fever (probably from the cocaine though) his back around his kidneys hurts CONSTANTLY to where he can barely move (he lays in bed all day on a heating pad) and he has been nauseous and vomited a lot last weekend.  I can't get him to go to the doctor!  What could this be?  Is it from the cocaine use or what? Could it have done something to his heart? He has lost 35 pounds and spent about $8,000 on his addiction since Christmas which to me is really bad.  I know he is risking his health in a big way but how serious could all this be?
THANKS

[lifeisbetter]

Hi,I just wanted to offer you or anyone out there in this nightmare some hope. Please read my post under Relapse...??

[Unwise]

I am amazed by your strength.  It comes through in the coherency of your writing.  Me, I would be a total wreck right now if I were in your shoes, so I commend you.

There has been a wealth of good advice here.  There are so many wise people here who have "been there, done that" and are willing to help.  I agree that you need to think about your own welfare first and foremost.  Then there is the question of your husband. If you love him enough to want to help him, then enough of his bullshit and lies.  This man needs serious help and he needs it NOW.  I am not sure what the legal ramifications of commiting him against his will are--maybe someone on this forum knows--but it seems to me that he needs to be hospitalized and treated for addiction whether he wants it or not.  Otherwise, I'm afraid he is going to kill himself and maybe you too.  He has already gotten you into incredible debt and lied to you about stopping.  How much further must it go before something worse happens?  If there is any way to get him into a treatment center or hospital, I think that is the best way to go.  I myself was the subject of an intervention, but I pretty much went along peacefully and was actually relieved that I was going to be hospitalized and monitored and taken care of.  For reasons I will not get into here, I only remained clean for about a month after getting out, but it at least gave me an opportunity to clean up with the help of professionals.  Just because I blew that opportunity doesn't mean that he will, and your choices seem extremely limited now anyway.  I wish you luck and continued strength in the face of this crisis.  Think of yourself, but if you love your husband, please get him professional help immediately.  Let us know what happens.

[jennyfla]

Something else, just stopping the drug doesn't mean it's over, there's the mental part and all the learning he will need to do in order to change his ways.  The drug is only is way of self-medicating himself for an underlying problem.  He has some problems, and until they are dealt with, figured out and managed, the drug use will not end.  This is something i didn't understand while my husband was using and i was using along side him. (BTW - we both still use so i'm no expert)  I thought you go to rehab and you come out all better.  There is a lot of work ahead of your husband, but he will need to want to get better, there's nothing you can say or do to make him change unless he wants it.  Forcing him into counseling is difficult, although he will learn some things about the disease because it sounds like he isn't very aware of how and what his disease is all about.
Going straight to shooting up doesn't happen, he must have had a past longer than he's leading you to believe.
Be safe and remember yourself, don't loose yourself in the tornado of your husband's addiction, it's very easy to do.  The torando runs through taking everything with it!!!!
Be safe!
Lv Jenny

[J.B. to Brian and Vicky]

So the saga continues in your wonderful adventure called life. It sounds like you are getting wiser, though!

I was in your husband's shoes a few times and today can know what you are going through.  There were times when I could have cared less about my wife and (God forbid!) my kids because I was too involved with getting the next high.  Towards the end, I was averaging $1400 a week on my "expenses".  Luckily, my wife is a professional that makes a decent income... because I blew my own.

Oh yes, I do suffer from hepatitis C from shooting up various drugs such as coke and heroine.  The trouble is that all this lifestyle comes back to haunt you with a vengeance!  I've been given 18 months to live several times by my doctors and there are times when I wish I could have died sooner...believe me.

I hope that your husband will read some of the things we write because it may save him a lot of grief someday.

J.B.

[icanrelate]

Hey to you...It so sucks..Ive been there, through the tears, lies, and hope. Im 32 thought i was al down with the niave ways of my innocent youth. From my own experience one does not just start shooting up.. Im sure youre also wise to this. This goes further back... I would assume??? ..?... If your knowledge of this is recent perhaps, I know this sucks, but its a rude awakening to  "It's all been a Lie"..First things must come first and that is you!!!!!!!! easier sad than done, God knows my owns struggles..If your man is sincer about his Apologise then maybe a good way to find faith in his word is to attempting a A.A. or narcotics meeting...just bring it up..See his response,,,, you know him..If hes not playing you he will at least consider it... and if he doesnt, perhaps he should contact you when he is serious......Ever heard of Tough Love???
I truelly dont know the answers , i just know the situation..., His life is up to him,, and your life is up to You...If he has probs dealing with his life all you do is offer alternatives.. But besides that its hard enough dealling with our own personal life(world) Its either sink or swim!!!!!!!! God be with you and also with him.  The battle of life would be lost with out him.(GOD) my prayer to you both and if possible include me in yours.  Rachel....***@****

[Salene]

Thanks Rachel for your post.  Sounds like you know a lot about this.  I don't.  I have no clue but what I've gotten on the internet and from lurking on boards like these trying to find out more info.  I would really like to e-mail you if you don't mind just to "talk" and get advice.    I want to believe my husand when he says he has quit but like today...I just found out that over the last 2 weeks he has taken $2000 cash advances off his credit card.  I know what he used it for.  And all the time he tells me he has quit.  That makes a grand total of almost $10,000 of cash advances off of credit since Christmas.   Yep we are in major debt now because of this.   I just don't know how it gets hold of you and makes you lie.  I wish I understood.

[Salene]

Thanks so much for your advice and concern.  I only know what I've researched on the net about this.  I've never known anyone that has done drugs and his doing this and taking it so far has shocked me to the core. It's just not like him.
His arm looks about completely healed.  He has literally slept straight through since Wednesday.  He gets up every now and then to eat, watch tv, etc.  He is extremely depressed.  He told me last night he feels awful and thinks he has "some kind of depression".  I don't know when the last time was he did the coke.  I know not to believe him when he says he hasn't.  But he lost his job 2 months ago due to this and has NO money so I don't know how he could get the drugs.  I saw the mental confusion for sure.  He acted VERY strange, totally not my husband, for a while and I didn't know what was going on until I found the drugs in his wallet.  He packed up and left after new years and asked for a divorce but I refused and wanted him to get help. He came crawling back 2 weeks ago begging for me to help him and work things out.  I took him back, probably shouldn't have though but I didn't know really what to do.
I am trying to get him to go to the doctor at least for some help with the depression which I'm sure is due to coming down?  Or not doing the coke?  I don't know how hard it is to quit this stuff but I'm being told he will have to get prof. help to do so.  He did go to the clinic and get tested for HIV and it was negative but I know he needs to go again in 6 mo.  He swears he reused his own needles and has never shared.  But do I believe him?
I do have another question...does doing the coke affect his kidneys badly?  I've noticed a pattern of every few days he is crying almost with his back hurting right around his kidneys and then it goes away.  When he first came back home it happened and he told me it was the drugs.  Now he says it's the mattress on the bed..?  I just don't know what all this drug does to your body.  
Thanks so much for listening.  You have given me good info and I appreciate your thoughts and prayers so much.
JSM

[stev e]

THERE IS AN ASPECT OF SHOOTING COKE WHICH NO-ONE HAS TOUCHED ON. IT IS WHAT HE IS THINKING WHEN HIGH. I HAVE DONE THIS 35 YRS AGO,AND IT IS AN UGLY SITUATION. THERE IS EXTREME MENTAL CONFUSION AND LOSS OF JUDGEMENT. SEVERE PARANOIA. I HAVE FACED A MUSSLE OF A GUN FROM PERSONS WHO I KNEW WELL, AND WAS CONVINCED THAT I BROUGHT THE POLICE OVER. WHAT I AM TRING REALLY TO SAY IS THAT YOU MAY NOT BE IN A SAFE SITUATION AND POSSIBILIE MAY HAVE TO HAVE HIM COMMTED TO AN HOSPITAL WITH PROFESSIONAL HELP AND UNDERSTANDING, YOUR SAFTY MAY BE IN DANGER. MY CONCERN IS WITH YOU

[confused.grl]

There is one thing that you are forgetting here is that some I.V. drug users do is share needles, therefore you run the risk of getting AIDS, hepatitis, and various other diseases. Is your dedication to helping this man are you thinking of your own saftey. no matter how much you love hi is he worth you losing your own life?

[CASEY]

Yes, reusing a needle is a primary way to get infection. You have no time to waste. Please print these responses and let him see for himself. And, yes, do take care of yourself. Gina

[zoe1]

Hi JSM... it sounds like your husband is a very sick man.  I know that you are worried about him;  rightly so.  BUT, please don't forget about yourself here.  Please take cre of yourself and your needs.  I know first hand how easy it is to get sucked into obsessing about loved one addictions.  Have you considered attending a support group that can help you?  You may want to look into Al-Anon or Nar-Anon.  When you start to care for yourself, you'll be helping your husband by serving as a positive example to him.  

I'll remember you in my prayers..

[Salene]

I know there is no way that I can make him stop.  I can't believe that he would continue to shoot up even after the scare this past weekend but I'm sure he probably is.  I know he doesn't know what he is doing because his arms are all bruised up really bad from his forearm to his shoulder almost.  He has sores and scabs all over them.  He tried doing it in his legs I guess too because he has bruises all over his legs.  He also reuses his needles several times..(I've found them here and there hidden and I threw them away)...will reusing needles increase his chances of an infection like endocarditis?  Today his arm looks much better but I'm still very worried about this heart thing and an infection.    Thanks for all your advice...
JSM

[stev e]

THE ABCESS IS FROM MISSING THE VEIN, AND IT WAS RIGHT TO HAVE IT ATTENDED TO. THE VOMITING CAN BE FROM ,WHEN INJECTED COCAINE WILL MAKE YOU SICK. I KNOW YOU ARE WORRIED,RIGHTFULLY SO, BUT KNOW IT IS EXPOSSED AND HE WILL HAVE TO MAKE A DECISION. 8,000 DOLLARS IS A LOT OF COKE TO INJECT, AND IT IS AT A QUICK PACE. THIS PACE WILL KILL, AND THE ONLY BRIGHT SPOT, HE HAS A CHANCE TO CLEAN HIMSELF UP . THE VERY BEST,AND OUR PRAYERS ARE OUT FOR YOU BOTH.

[J.B. to Brian and Vicky]

Experimental IV drug use is bad business regardless of the drug being injected.  When a person injects an unknown substance directly into the vein, so many things can happen!  Immediate death or a long and lingering disease like endocarditis.

I had a good friend who injected what he thought was cocaine one afternoon. Within half an hour's time, he was being transported to the med center by helicopter.  He suffered a brain aneurism. He survived but has never fully recovered from this.

Does your boyfriend have a death wish?  At times we can get ourselves into this mindset without a clue as to the outcome unless someone or something stops us.

J.B.

[skipper]

JSM:
welcome to this forum etc...
GET YOUR HUSBAND TO A HOSPITAL NOW! IF HE WON'T GO CALL 911.
AT THE VERY LEAST HE HAS AN INFECTED ABCESS IN HIS ARM. THIS
INFECTION HAS GONE SYSTEMIC AND HAS PROBABLY INFECTED HIS KIDNEYS
LUNGS, AND HEART. THIS IS LIFE OR DEATH STUFF GOING ON!! AT
THE VERY LEAST HE RUNS A RISK OF LOSING THE AFFECTED ARM. TAKE/
MAKE HIM GO TO HOSPITAL ER ROOM NOW!!
GODS SPEED & KEEP AN ANGEL ON YOUR SHOULDER
KIP

[CASEY]

If he doesn't go to the doctor, you will end up calling 911 probably. I just got my son out of the hospital. He had developed endocarditis from iv use. He had a staph infection in his heart and was hospitalized for 2 weeks. (Should have been 6 but we couldn't keep him there). Luckily, the infection had not destroyed his heart valve which commonly happens with IV users and results in valve replacement. My son had a high fever, was extremely dehydrated, had a severe headache, nausea, vomiting. They let him out of the hospital with an IV in his arm so he could go back for antiobiotics. He shot up through his IV. Be careful or he might end up with a heart transplant. good luck! Gina