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Avatar universal

oxycontin I'm going to f'n win this fight

Hi fellow warriors, today has been a relatively good day.  Didn't sleep much I was in excruciating pain, the familiar one my back not withdrawals.  I saw my doctor today told him I dumped my pills last Friday and 72 hours later I was in agony with tremors was out of my mind literally, my husband called 911 because I was going to end it and he knew I would, I was abusive to him the cops the ems workers.  I told him that I was addicted even though I only abused them a couple of times for relief.  He was really good about it was sorry I went through that and has referred me to a pain management clinic in Ottawa.  I told him that I would never again take any oxycontin or any other drug that's supposed to help but winds up controlling your life and sucking your lifeforce.  He was truly sorry that he had prescribed those to me.  I'm still anxious, depressed, can't eat, can't sleep, but it will pass.  I don't know what age most of you are but I'm a big music fan and too many talented, young musicians and singers died.  So to help me with my determination to quit for good I watch Mother Love Bone's Andrew Wood videos on you tube.  He died of a heroin overdose just before their first albums release in 1990 and the critics loved it.   From that group emerged Pearl Jam, He never got the pleasure of seeing his hard work pay off.  Well as I said I get online and I watch videos of all the bands I like who lost one of their members to heroin and I cry and I get scared ******** and I become more determined to quit.  It's punishing but it works.  I'll keep you posted on my recovery because let's face it we have a long winding road ahead of us and it's not strewn with roses.  Take care and empathy in your suffering......... hugs to all
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Avatar universal
I like your title:) That is quite the story. Just wanted to wish you luck on your recovery and glad you dumped your pills. So have you been clean since Friday? (6 days) I also see your from Elliot Lake, I have been there a few time, but it's way north. Good luck!
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Avatar universal
Yes, I was suffering a lot 6 hours after my last dose but it was nothing compare to the 72 hr mark, that's when I went to the hospital by ambulance.  There's some stuff I've forgotten which freaks me out and yep I'm from EL.  I can't wait for this to be over, it's the emotional that's killing me now I get so anxious I tremble and I cry a lot can't forget the can't eat or sleep either.  I feel and look like a sack of **** real attractive..  Thanks for the good wishes, I'm really happy I found you guys........
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679575 tn?1245115450
shannonhoon you must be a blind melon fan!!!!  It was a shame when he died.  I to have been to Elliot lake.  I grew up in Northern Ontario in small town named Kapuskasing and now i live in Ottawa. Which pain clinic did you get referred to?  Just curious to see if i know that clinic.  I am a chronic pain patient so I know some of the place here in this city. Is the hospital good in Elliot Lake, i know that sometimes small hospitals don't have means to offer proper care for some things.
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Avatar universal
So when you went to the hospital did they give you something to help you? No way can i make it that far, 2 yrs of oxys did it to me, i tried a couple times CT and days 2,3,4 No way. I was going insane, im now 3 days into it with Subs, taking 1 a day in 1/4s My Dr wanted me to take 3 a day for six months and then talk about tapering, I Think not, im just trying t get around the worst part of it that your talking about. I really, really feel for you, Hopefuly they gave you something to calm down and relaz so you could eat ansd sleep so you heal.I think that is part of the  problem of detoxing really hard, we cause even more damage and it justs lasts that much longer,..Wish you well....
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Avatar universal
Yep, I'm a Blind Melon fan, I'm going to the vigil in September and I want to be clean, I've become friends with his mom and would like to see her completely clean.
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Avatar universal
I don't know which clinic so it'll be a surprise, I've been to Kap.  I live in Sudbury now.  Which clinic is best in Ottawa?  
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Avatar universal
Yes, they gave me a shot of morphine which calmed me down and I slept that night. They also gave me clonidine to help with the withdrawals but it makes me feel so weak so I'm not taking it tonight and see what happens.  Someone posted here that he's from Australia and they do this in private hospital and that's giving them morphine for 3 weeks.  Apparently has a high success rate.  I'm having a bad time tonight, I still can't sleep and eat very little because I'm too nauseous to eat.  Tomorrow will be better.  G'nite all and hope you find some relief........
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679575 tn?1245115450
That is so cool that you know his mother.  I really like him.  It was so sad when he died.  I couldn't help thinking what a waste of talent.  He had such a cool voice.  I lived in Sudbury for 4 years from 1999 to 2003. Then moved to Ottawa.  I really like the pain clinic that i went to.  It was on bank street near hunt club it was called CPM pain management clinic.  The staff and the doctors there were great.  They treated you so well.  If i was having pain problems and it was a long time before my next appointment they would fit me right away the same day the I call. You can't ask for better service then that.  And they understand pain so they aren't afraid to treat it like some doctors are and that is very important to me.  I want to have a fairly decent quality of life and that is what they gave me.  So no complaints from here.  I know that there is a new one that opened up but I really don't know much about it.  So there isn't any pain management clinics in Sudbury???  I didn't get sick until i moved to Ottawa, so i guess that was a good thing that it held out until a year after i moved away from Sudbury,  I also have specialist that I have to see, it makes me wonder if I had gotten sick while I still lived in Sudbury what kind of medical care i would have received. I am thinking Ottawa was a very good decision on my part. and to think i only came here to work for a few months then go back to sudbury but I ended up getting a great job so i decided to move permently  Thank God for the decision.  Usually i always make the wrong ones. Well good luck and keep on posting
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