Aa
therapy 4 the mind
I have my dr's appointment today and I really want to speak to him about therapy. I was in there last week and he told me that he knew I was going to other dr's for meds and he was pretty mad at me. He hasn't given me anything other than ultram in about 6 months but he also thought I was through with the loracet that he had been perscribing the 8 months prior. When he found out about me going to other dr's he said he couldn't trust me and he only gave me a few of the ultram and said I had to come back every week and check in with him to get more and so he knows I am not shopping any more. How do dr's find out about this kind of stuff? I am really trying to staighten up and I haven't used in 6 days but I am always able to do this I just can't keep myself off of them. I thought this would be a good reason to see a therapist. Any advice on this from anyone. I really want to kick this thing.
I would like to share a few observations with you ...
First ... The 12 step program is only one way to address a drug, drinking, gambling, or food obsession. As you said, after getting straight the real challenge is staying straight.
The first step .. "Admitted we were powerless over substances and our lives had become unmanagable". ... anyone that takes an honest look at his life during the ravages of drug abuse can see just how unmanagable it is. The 12step program is about honesty and breaking the isolation. Addiction is a "progressive" disease. That means that it can be arrested, but it will always be there and it will continue to progress even though we are not actively using. Another reality check for those of us who refuse to remember where we came from. Sorry to say .... but if I don't refresh my memory on a regular basis, I will start to lie to myself and minimize everything .... I will invent history and pretty soon I will believe that it wasn't all that bad and I can handle it. I'm not like those "other" people. I quit before, I can do it again.... . I know there is another "high" out there, but I don't know if there is another recovery. Life is too short. NA is an anonymous fellowship and the custom of introducing yourself as an addict helps to keep us humble and teachable. Being an addict is only "part" of who we are .. we are so much more. Unfortunately, until we recover from this affliction, it is likely to dominate our lives. I love the program for alot of reasons ... but mainly because it works. Goldie
First ... The 12 step program is only one way to address a drug, drinking, gambling, or food obsession. As you said, after getting straight the real challenge is staying straight.
The first step .. "Admitted we were powerless over substances and our lives had become unmanagable". ... anyone that takes an honest look at his life during the ravages of drug abuse can see just how unmanagable it is. The 12step program is about honesty and breaking the isolation. Addiction is a "progressive" disease. That means that it can be arrested, but it will always be there and it will continue to progress even though we are not actively using. Another reality check for those of us who refuse to remember where we came from. Sorry to say .... but if I don't refresh my memory on a regular basis, I will start to lie to myself and minimize everything .... I will invent history and pretty soon I will believe that it wasn't all that bad and I can handle it. I'm not like those "other" people. I quit before, I can do it again.... . I know there is another "high" out there, but I don't know if there is another recovery. Life is too short. NA is an anonymous fellowship and the custom of introducing yourself as an addict helps to keep us humble and teachable. Being an addict is only "part" of who we are .. we are so much more. Unfortunately, until we recover from this affliction, it is likely to dominate our lives. I love the program for alot of reasons ... but mainly because it works. Goldie
Oh yeah I absolutely agree with the "control" point you described. When I had pills, it was all or nothing. Sorry if I misunderstood your intentions.
I found it incredible that people could actually taper in their detox. For me it was simple...have drugs, do drugs.
I guess it all goes back to the "choice" issue. Don't get me wrong...opiate addiction is 99.9% a pure psychological battle.
But what is unique is that many can beat this addiction with little or no medical/mental health intervention, while others require intensive treatment with synthetic forms of opiates and opiate blocking medications.
I've read several stories on this forum how somebody c/t from a 400mg to 800mg a day OC habit, while others struggle with a small 15mg - 20mg hydrocodone habit.
While I refuse to accept the "disease" concept, there is no doubt that there is several underlying factors that determine if one is to be successful longterm. I do not subscribe that physically dependent opiate users are "weak willed". But, there is no doubt that determination and self responsibility play a major role in your ability to become and stay sober. Just look in your local phone book or do an Internet search on drug addiction, it's a multi-billion dollar industry out to treat "Your disease"
Finding out how others are successful and also researching why others are unsuccessful, would be money well spent.
Just my 2 cents.
Peace
Kilo
I found it incredible that people could actually taper in their detox. For me it was simple...have drugs, do drugs.
I guess it all goes back to the "choice" issue. Don't get me wrong...opiate addiction is 99.9% a pure psychological battle.
But what is unique is that many can beat this addiction with little or no medical/mental health intervention, while others require intensive treatment with synthetic forms of opiates and opiate blocking medications.
I've read several stories on this forum how somebody c/t from a 400mg to 800mg a day OC habit, while others struggle with a small 15mg - 20mg hydrocodone habit.
While I refuse to accept the "disease" concept, there is no doubt that there is several underlying factors that determine if one is to be successful longterm. I do not subscribe that physically dependent opiate users are "weak willed". But, there is no doubt that determination and self responsibility play a major role in your ability to become and stay sober. Just look in your local phone book or do an Internet search on drug addiction, it's a multi-billion dollar industry out to treat "Your disease"
Finding out how others are successful and also researching why others are unsuccessful, would be money well spent.
Just my 2 cents.
Peace
Kilo
Just a few words to sy hey, i haven't been online for a while because frankly I just don't feel as though I have anything to to say that is gonna change anyones mind. Its a bad attitude and zI wish I had a better outlook on life but I just feel like I blew my life and hope some of these kids can change it around and live a good life, the kind that they claim to want.I doubt that I will be bothering ya'll with my bullshit anymore so you can put your mind at rest, Sorry for breaking your thread, I just saw your name and wanted to say hey. Take care and I hope you find what it is you are looking for and go on to live a long happy drug free life if thats what you want. I'm through with all the drama myself.
Later Bro,
Jimb
Later Bro,
Jimb
Yes. Thx. for clearing that up. Many purchase a scrip or two w/ insurance and the rest w/o. (IE: The customer pays cash, uses different pharmacies/docs). That's their red wagons minus governmental red flags, tho. Best to you. ~~
Thanks for anexcellent post!! I agree w/ everything you say. I don't think we disagree on the "control" issue....What I was trying to tell Mystere is that, once she makes the choice to use, she will find it difficult if not impossible to control her intake/dosage. But , can she make the decision to NOT USE in the first place? Absolutely. So I think we are basically saying the same thing here. Your topic of powerlessness should be inserted here.. I have posted on this forum more than a few times that I have NEVER agreed with the 12-Step premise that we are powerless, and some Higher Power is calling the shots for us. WE are keeping OURSELVES sober; thank you very much!! :-) I decide whether or not to put **** in my body; not some etheral being. I have a great deal of power in regard to my addiction, and when 12-Step people give the ol' "You have the choice to use or not use when you wake up in the morning" speech, they are actually supporting my claim that the power is, indeed, MINE.
Neither do I think addiction is a disease. Like you say, when it was decided to call it that (by whom?) it gave way to putting a cute label and more importantly, A SCAPEGOAT Catagory that was so very necessary. If people couldn't blame their misbehavior and sins on something other than themselves, how would one ever forgive oneself for all the havoc that we wreaked throughout our duration? And, if we had to "own" all that guilt, how could anyone stay sober??? It would be impossible in that frame of mind. So---let's call it a disease,, place the blame on that, and voila!!! it provides a multitude of excuses. I have always thought the analogy of addiction to diabetes, cancer, or what have you was absoultely laughable!! Let's see, now---you mean to tell me you're seriously comparing insulin to a mood-altering substance???? You must be joking!!!! One save a life, the other destroys..How did this stupid comparison EVER come about???!!!!
I am mandated to attend AA mtgs. and when it comes to my turn to speak, I WILL NOT say, " Hi, I'm Diane and I'm an addict/alkie" I'll just start talking. And invariably, someone will start "aheming" me....to prompt me, which I will smugly ignore.....WHY do I have to identify myself w/ a label, which, like you say. is one I left behind??? Must I wear that hair shirt FOREVER???? The funniest (sickening, really) thing is, that at meetings, when someone talks, then another one says their thing, and the first speaker wants to comment on what was said, they all say" I'm Joe, and I'm STILL an alkie." when they've just spoken 2 minutes previous. Jesus!! How ridiculous can you be??? Do you HEAR yourself???
I'm going on , I know...I'll close. I think you and I have the same beliefs, Kilo--I just didn't express mine very well in my post to Mystere. You added some very worthwhile points, and it was nice to know that I'm not alone in my beliefs. My best to all----Peaz
P.S. My daughter has seen Circque de Soilel(did I butcher that spelling??) in Vegas and loved them, too!! Have you seen Blue Man Group???
Neither do I think addiction is a disease. Like you say, when it was decided to call it that (by whom?) it gave way to putting a cute label and more importantly, A SCAPEGOAT Catagory that was so very necessary. If people couldn't blame their misbehavior and sins on something other than themselves, how would one ever forgive oneself for all the havoc that we wreaked throughout our duration? And, if we had to "own" all that guilt, how could anyone stay sober??? It would be impossible in that frame of mind. So---let's call it a disease,, place the blame on that, and voila!!! it provides a multitude of excuses. I have always thought the analogy of addiction to diabetes, cancer, or what have you was absoultely laughable!! Let's see, now---you mean to tell me you're seriously comparing insulin to a mood-altering substance???? You must be joking!!!! One save a life, the other destroys..How did this stupid comparison EVER come about???!!!!
I am mandated to attend AA mtgs. and when it comes to my turn to speak, I WILL NOT say, " Hi, I'm Diane and I'm an addict/alkie" I'll just start talking. And invariably, someone will start "aheming" me....to prompt me, which I will smugly ignore.....WHY do I have to identify myself w/ a label, which, like you say. is one I left behind??? Must I wear that hair shirt FOREVER???? The funniest (sickening, really) thing is, that at meetings, when someone talks, then another one says their thing, and the first speaker wants to comment on what was said, they all say" I'm Joe, and I'm STILL an alkie." when they've just spoken 2 minutes previous. Jesus!! How ridiculous can you be??? Do you HEAR yourself???
I'm going on , I know...I'll close. I think you and I have the same beliefs, Kilo--I just didn't express mine very well in my post to Mystere. You added some very worthwhile points, and it was nice to know that I'm not alone in my beliefs. My best to all----Peaz
P.S. My daughter has seen Circque de Soilel(did I butcher that spelling??) in Vegas and loved them, too!! Have you seen Blue Man Group???
For me, it's definitely physical more than psycholigical. It's the physical suffering that I cannot take. Psychologically, I hate to take opiates. I don't get high. I just have to mitigate the physical suffering.
Hippee, it was one doctor that prescribed the levoxyl and the neurontin at the same time (not addiction doc though). He did not comment on any effect resulting from combination of the two.
Hippee, it was one doctor that prescribed the levoxyl and the neurontin at the same time (not addiction doc though). He did not comment on any effect resulting from combination of the two.
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