Methadone

[Nobody]

I am addicted to oxycontin taking 180mg per day.  I have been to rehab twice, they put me on meth for 4 days and I go home. Then I am so sick, no energy,no appetite for weeks.  I then get back on the pills because I cant function.  Am I a candidate for a methadone program> Should I seek this type of program?  I am more scared of addiction to methadone than you can imagine but is there a short term type methadone program available? I just dont know what to do. I am 60 and find myself in a raging addiction and have to work everyday or I am in the street. Thanks for any advise you can give me.  (I am also totally closet about this addiction). I am raising my grandchildren. I have to function in the workplace.  Thank you very much.

[hippy]

we have or are going through the same problems.
are you in bad pain .
you might want to get on somthing not as strong as oxy's and then start to taper down.
keep posting , there ere answewrs here.and a lot of ways to get through this. peace

[angst]

you are not a nobody.  i hope your nickname does not reflect the way you feel about yourself.  you are an important someone raising your grandchildren.  if you live in a decently large city, you can find a methadone program.  they do usually offer a 21 day detox.  you may be able to find an addictionologist or pain specialist if you are in chronic pain.  they can also help you w/d without as much trauma.  i had severe vascular headaches that would hit me in clusters.  i got addicted to prescription Stadol NS.  after 2 years i was taking a bottle a day, this lasted from 1993-1997.  after the doctor started getting into trouble, he switched me to propoxyphene or darvocets.  they did not help, even if i took 10 at a time.  i od'd. i became a street junkie, shooting dilaudid whenever i could get it.  after losing my nursing license, my family, and almost losing my mind,
i went back to methadone for the 2nd time.  it helped me and probably saved my life.  i do not advocate methadone for most addicts because it is the hardest drug to get off of.  i got off once before and i am strong enough to get off again.  good luck.

[rowanshyne]

Hang on.  Listen to the folks who posted before me and after me.  I'm just a silly, little addict hanging on for dear life, just like everyone else.
The others can educate and support you and give you the will to fight back.  They've done that for me, and each other and *anyone* willing to come here and lay it out.
Keep on keepin' on, we're with you.

BB,
Wren

[tex3]

Detox is a wondeful thing in that it can get you past the horrible first days of withdrawal. But it does nothing for the longterm problems you mentioned, which we all suffer through. The lack of energy, the depression, all the other lovely stuff we have to deal with. Believe it or not, that stuff even gets better, but it takes time; I've found nothing that takes it away, although some things help. Each time you detox it will be harder, though. Methadone might very well be an answer for you while you deal with the larger problems of addiction. I would recommend first getting a recovery plan, which might include meth along with a 12-step program. It is just too hard to do on your own, as most of us here can attest. Are you seeing a specialist? Where do you live?

My hat is off to you for raising your grandkids. You are a strong person and can do this, but it takes work and it takes help; don't be afraid to accept that. Immerse yourself in recovery and you can get through this, a day at a time. Don't be ashamed to accept any help offered to you, and seek it out. This is hell but you can pull out of it. Please let us know how you are doing. You are on a high dose of Oxy so this will take time, but can be done.

tracy

[OxyDout]

Hey how are you, I was on oxy for a couple of years, I was on 160-200mg a day. i detoxed with meth, however, I realized that with the half life of methadone you really  need to take minimal amounts, I only took 5mg a day which is nothing, plus it was a wafer, not liquid.  It didn't last because I kind of caved in to those dumb little pills.  So, you can try methadone, just take minimal amounts, but it still won't be the long term answer.  I think all of us when recovering need to find a solution that will be a good one, the right one.  Many people can taper with a lesser strengh med, others cold turkey..... it all depends, however this is DOABLE!!!!!!!, keep you head up and you will make it through.  I was doing well and then I started taking hydrocodone for my recent knee surgery. I tapered off again then I was taking 1 hydrocodone a day, I went through a minimal withdrawal for the last couple of days ( I made it groovy!) but I still have a long way to go, but I can do this, I want to do this. Just keep posting and stay positive.

GWH

[Nobody]

Wow, I am surprised at the responses I got from you all.  How very kind.  I am in South Fl so I quess I could find a meth clinic.  Its so hard to believe at my age.  Ugh!  I would prefer to see a physician who can treat me but how does one find an addiction doctor.  The treatment centers are great and I come home feeling fine.  Then I dont want to live.  Last time I lost 26 pounds in four weeks.  I was dying.  Couldnt get up etc etc.  Now, I have to work so I have to find another solution.  I will keep watching the board and seeking encouragment and advise.  I know I dont want to do this drug.  I just dont see any option other than lying in bed and waiting till the mortgage co. throws me out.  There has to be some way in between. Essentially I dont want to get high and I dont want to die but when I am straight and hurting the latter seems most sensible.  (I am not going to harm myself so please dont think that.)  I just want a long term program of WD so I can still work.  I hope I am making sense and thanks again so much.  (I am writing a book entitled "Nobody's Coming", hence the screename).

[angst]

Good luck with what you  choose.  I chose the methadone for the second time.  I felt I needed a longer program also.  it is hell coming off, but you are stronger when it's over. not so depressed. and if you find a good na group, they will support you too.  good luck. keep posting and let us know how it is going.  I care.  Ava

[Vitamedic]

Methadone is an extremely useful drug to help getting killer opiates. It can only be prescribed by a methadone clinic for the disease of addicition. Methadone is frequently prescribed by pain specialist for chronic pain.  Methadone is a useful drug if taken correctly. Abuse it and you will have the same problem as with any opiate like medicine. Remember,methadone clinics are a business and you will be treated like a number unless you find a "medical model clinic". Research the clinic that you are considering attending through a website called "Methadone Watchdog". They report all shortcomes of clinics across the U.S.
Methadone is for any individual who is hopelessly addicted and must continue to work because they cannot STOP WORK !! Good Luck! Vitamedic...

[skipper]

Man who calls self "nobody"

alright, as everone else has pointed out, you are someone! (if nothing more than the man who refers to himself as nobody!) first
of all welcome to the forum! there will always be room for just one more junky (who wants just one more) in here, so come on in!

i've been mostly on and some off junk for 35 years. i used to B&E
pharmacy's and clinics to get my hands on as many opiates of any
kind as i could....

now it just me and lots of oxycontin and pain. i'm a "legal junky" as if that's any difference from any other junky.

i anxiously await your book," Nobody's Coming!" (also the screen
play. i too  write... mostly poetry. my creativity seems to soar
while detoxing and/or going through w/d

please keep posting
and keep an angel on your shoulder
kip

[Nobody]

I cant find a meth clinic.  I dont know what to do..  I am too scared to move and cant tell anyone. We all know there are too options here.  Quit using or die.  Well I want to quit using but I am just a number and I just want to talk to someone who will listen to me and help me.  Yes, I am a typical junkie and need the typical detox and 12 step program.  But I am not so typical a person and I am clearly not in a typical situation.  My options are not so typical.  I need someone to talk to.  What kind of clinic did someone say where I wouldnt be a number. Can someone help me find one.  Will they listen to me. I am very near the end of the proverbial rope.  Screeming to the whole world for help.  I know some will say I am on a pity pot and that is exactly the kind of response I dont want to hear.  I looked in the yellow pages etc and nothing on meth. I know one thing for certain. Whoever posted that some people have to be on meth because of work understood my situation.  But where do I find this meth cliniic. I have never been so alone in my life or so scared and now I have to get up and pretend I am normal and fix breakfast for kids.  Unreal!!  Thank you all and please dont tell me it s a pity pot.  I am at a very serious point in my worthless junkie life with no way out.

[skipper]

man who calls self nobody:

i'm not going to give you a pity pot lecture. i've heard all that
**** enough for everyone else on this forum....

it isn't face to face conversation, but keep posting to us. i for
one am intrested in what happens to you.

as far as a methadone clinic. try calling local hospitals and asking for info about what and where it is available. i must caution you, getting set up in a clinic can take some time.

there are several other people who post here who may know of web
sites listing clinics in various places across the US. i'm hoping
someone will come forward to help...

in the mean time how about a heart to heart with your regular doc? i was real suprised at the reaction of my regular doc (i don't think he has ever written an Rx for anything stronger than t-3). it turned out he was instramental in getting me set up with the pain/addiction doc who takes care of me and my intractable
pain.

you and your story are very important commoditys here. please
keep posting...and keep an angel on your shoulder!
kip

[Hinkster]

Do you hurt anywhere, what I mean do you have irrtractable pain?
You might be able to do what I did. See if you can get in a pain
management center. There they can give you methadone tabs for
pain. I'am not sure but I would imagine you can use those pills
for maintence and not just pain. They started me off with oxycotin and after awhile they switched me over to methadone.
Maybe you could get your feet wet that way. Like Skipper I too
care about what happens to you. Keep us informed.
kip....What a great little dogma poem that was. Would you hurry
and get that book published so everyone can take advantaged of
your writings. I would like to be #1 on the list to recieve my
autographed copy. You are too good to be silenced for much longer
Tom

[Nobody]

Hi, and thank you again for posting.  I am a woman by the way. I have no real pain so as to go to a pain management clinic.. I called around today and got nowhere.  How long does it take to be approved by a meth clinic??  I have thought about the suggestion about fessing up to my regular MD but I am so afraid he will not understand.  I might do that though.  Is there someone who can email me that has been through this.  I long to talk to someone.  Is it improper to put my email address here?  I must do something, and very soon.  Bad thoughts keep taking over my mind. When I wake up in the morning to this addiction it overwhelms me that I am in this position.  Everything is overwhelming.  I will keep checking the board with the hope of help.  By the way, I write well when I am not using, but my book is on hold and has the same prognosis as I do.  Get off these drugs or die.  I just wish I had someone to talk to.  I am off the charts with fear and lonliness and isolation.  Thank you all so very much for any help I can get.

[angst]

By talking to your doctor, you may open a channel where he can help you find a methadone clinic.  It is legal in 46 states for treatment purposes.  I have to cross state line, from MS to AL.
In Mississippi, our attorney general, thinks we have no addicts, but the jails are full of people like me.  I just got lucky and never got caught on the street.  Where do you live?  Try searching Methadone Alliance.  You should find out something there.  Good luck.

[IrishRose]

Hi nobody- You must have a computer or access to one so I'll give you a few websites to check out that I hope will help you or point you in the direction of help. First, since you are considering methadone and having trouble locating a clinic, go to www.methadone.org, there is a directory there that will give you a list of names and numbers of methadone clinics in the US. Next, don't rule it out, Narcotics Anonymous. There are meetings everywhere, go to www.na.org, for information on the program and meetings. If you go to a meeting you will most certainly meet others in your situation and the addictis there will likely know where the methadone clinic in your area is. An online zine that is informative about addiction, recovery and everything in between is www.herointimes.com. The American Society of Addiction Medicine has a website also that can help you locate an addiction medicne specialist near you as well, it is
www.asam.org. I'm just an alcoholic married to a junkie, but I know your fear. There is a way through this

[angst]

There has to be a methadone clinic somewhere close for you. I will do some checking myself.  I go to a clinic where I get counselling and group therapy.  They make money, but they try to offer the best they can for us addicts.  It is not slam, bam, and thank you maam.  I've learned coping skills and more about myself there than I knew before I went.  When I have a problem, I have a counsellor who is there for me.  I had to go through surgery, and my counsellor saw that we set up my takehomes for the right day.  I made it back for my next takehomes (i was not supposed to be driving).  Then I got back on schedule.  He has been there for me when I was crying over my relationship with my daughter.  He offers family counselling.  Group therapy is good.
For the most part, you learn something.  It may not be rocket science, but it is good.  I'll see what I can find out with the location you gave.  I'll post back.   Ava

[angst]

I just checked a list on Methadone Alliance.  There are treatment centers all over Florida.  You can email me at ***@**** and give me a city.  You can search under Methadone Allicance and look for a listing of MMTC's.  You have to state by state alphabetically.  You can probably find what you need.  Or email me  and I'll help.  Ava

[oh please already]

Out of every crisis comes the chance to be reborn, to reconceive
ourselves as individuals, to choose the kind of change that will help us to grow and to fulfill ourselves more completely."

  Before choosing to recover, most of us lived through crisis after crisis. Many days we sought the oblivion of alcohol and drugs rather than face fears that ate away at us. It probably wasn't possible for most of us to realize that a crisis was a tool for growth.

  Even today, even in our recovery program, even though the clouds are clearing and we are feeling better about ourselves, a crisis may overwhelm us for a time.  We do find help for it, though.  We can breathe deeply, look to our higher power, listen for the messages that are coming through from our friends.  And we can choose among the many options for the right action to take at this time.

Life is a series of lessons.  Crises can be seen as the homework.  They aren't there to defeat us but to help us grow--to graduate us into the next stage of life.

"Today, I will look for my lessons and feel exhilarated by the growth that is guaranteed."
    I got this from a friend and thought I'd pass it on.    laura

hope every one is doing well,Im hanging on ,with 1 finger true-but Im still on.Thats gotta count for something.

[Nobody]

Thanks again for your responses.  I have decided to start with my MD  I have an appointment tomorrow at 4.  I know all I will do is cry and he will tell me to see a shrink.  Its a start. It may well be a finish.  You all are very kind.

[angst]

are you still checking out the forum and posting?  i would like to hear how it went at the doctor's?  i am concerned with what you have decided to do?  please do not give up.  detoxing is doable.  i know.     Ava

[Nobody]

I emailed you at the address you gave me.  Did you get it?  Can you email me at ***@****

[angst]

i received the one before the visit to the doctor.  i have not received anything else.  here it goes ***@****  
i could not get through via the address you gave me.  could you
repeat it?  i want to know how you are?  good luck&Blessings, Ava

[Sunshine49]

I have been taking Methadone and Percocet for control of chronic pain...after 6 back surgeries (in the last 5 years), I just had my last one and hopefully that is it!! I've just about had it with all these surgeries...I had to have so many because of one doctor's bad mistakes. At any rate, I just stopped my methadone (already got off the percocet 3 months ago) and I took my last 5 mg. tablet yesterday morning at 5:00 a.m.  I have been working with my doctor on this and he also prescribed "Clonodine" to help alleviate the withdrawal symptoms. I was taking the 5 mg. every 12 hours...had gotten it down to that at least. But I decided to just stop it altogether, can't stand it anymore and I just want to get it all overwith.  But now I have these horrible crying jags (I'm usually a very happy upbeat person who never complains), and I can't sleep, feel like I'm on speed or something, have no appetite. I'm taking vitamins and all and I'm trying to eat a little soup or juice when I am able, but I am just wondering how bad this is going to get or how long it could last---the withdrawal pains and symptoms. Does anyone have any suggestions?  My doctor has been an angel to work with me through this, but now its all up to me to just wing it out I guess. I already called my doctor and have discussed this all with him, he said that it just takes time).  I also feel like my muscles are being pulled in all directions. I have a comfortable bed and home, but when I'm in bed I just feel like I can't stop moving, really restless.  I know that I can't take something for sleep or muscle relaxants because that would be defeating the purpose. Does anyone know of any natural herbs that help in this kind of situation? I am on synthroid for hypothyroidism so I have to be careful of what kind of herbs I take. Any words of wisdom or help would be greatly appreciated,
Thanks,
Sunshine49

[angst]

Welcome to the forum.  My nickname is Angst, and my real name is Ava.  I am methadone for the 2nd time in 5 years.  I detoxed the first time.  I also tappered to 5 mg, but flushed 4 pills, because I wanted it to be over.  I lived on gatorade and immodium ad.  The stomach ills lasted for almost a month, along with muscle spasms and pain where I never knew I could hurt there
I was teary at times.  My family walked on eggshells.  I attended
90NA meetings in 90 days or more.  I continued attending NA, and
they gave me the support I needed.
I stayed clean for just over 6 months.  I had 3 relapses.  The last one sent me running back to the clinic.  It saved my life.
I hope it will only be a couple of more months before I detox again.  Methadone is one of the hardest drugs to w/d from.  I do
not recommend methadone to other addicts unless they were using as heavy as I was.  Also, my drug of choice was dilaudid and I
shot it as often as I could afford it.  I had to have something
every day.  Good luck and Blessings,  Ava.  You can do this, but
remember it is a hard drug to w/d  from.  It took me a month to get back to normal.  Hang in there and keep posting.  It helps.