Aa
withdrawls
Hello,
I will try and make this short. I am not a herione addict..I hate needles in fact. I recently got married and I have fibromyalgia. so I am in a lot of pain.. My husband lied to me and told me he was taking valium but i found out he had been taking methadone for 9 yrs. I ask him to quit. instead he started giving me small doses of his meth for my pain..next thing i know I am taking his nightly dose of 40 mgs every day for 5 months. I have to get off this..I am going to divorce him at some point in time. He likes the drug and I have made the worst decision of my life getting addicted to a drug like this. I did take lorecet for quite a long time for my fibromyalgia . I am taking 35 mgs this week and plan on decreasing 5 mgs per week until i get down to 5.I have some xanax and valium i can use if needed.. thn..but i was wondering if you could tell me how bad it may be>? I refuse to go to a clinic to detox..I know I can do this on my own within 2 months.I believe very strongly in God and he will be there to help me.
God Bless
CARE
I will try and make this short. I am not a herione addict..I hate needles in fact. I recently got married and I have fibromyalgia. so I am in a lot of pain.. My husband lied to me and told me he was taking valium but i found out he had been taking methadone for 9 yrs. I ask him to quit. instead he started giving me small doses of his meth for my pain..next thing i know I am taking his nightly dose of 40 mgs every day for 5 months. I have to get off this..I am going to divorce him at some point in time. He likes the drug and I have made the worst decision of my life getting addicted to a drug like this. I did take lorecet for quite a long time for my fibromyalgia . I am taking 35 mgs this week and plan on decreasing 5 mgs per week until i get down to 5.I have some xanax and valium i can use if needed.. thn..but i was wondering if you could tell me how bad it may be>? I refuse to go to a clinic to detox..I know I can do this on my own within 2 months.I believe very strongly in God and he will be there to help me.
God Bless
CARE
Please don't beat yourself up. As far as hitting bottom, you choose how far down the elevator goes. IT will only get worse if you continue to use. That is as much a tenet of truth as the golden rule.
Whatever your decision regarding your husband, you will be much better equipped to deal with it after getting some clean time and talking to healthy people. Your sobriety is not about him, it's about you. Save yourself.
i really, REALLY hope you stick with this...you've made the step, you've suffered, don't go back. do you have parents in the area or a friend's house you could go to?
you are doing the best thing for yourself and child - i have a child too, so i know what guilt you are going thru.
you must be so achingly disappointed in your husband, but he has to reach his own "rock bottom" - you can't let him drag you down with him. just remember, you will have to go thru this at some point - every addict does. you've already started, so you don't want to turn back now.
even if you don't have anywhere else to go, let your husband take care of you and your child. make paramount decisions when you are well again. don't think into the future right now, just try to get thru each moment.
let your husband's unwillingness to get clean make you stronger - you will be the "rock" for your child - you will be the one who's got it together....YOU CAN DO THIS!
keep writing - you'll get tons of support here. i'm praying for you...
you are doing the best thing for yourself and child - i have a child too, so i know what guilt you are going thru.
you must be so achingly disappointed in your husband, but he has to reach his own "rock bottom" - you can't let him drag you down with him. just remember, you will have to go thru this at some point - every addict does. you've already started, so you don't want to turn back now.
even if you don't have anywhere else to go, let your husband take care of you and your child. make paramount decisions when you are well again. don't think into the future right now, just try to get thru each moment.
let your husband's unwillingness to get clean make you stronger - you will be the "rock" for your child - you will be the one who's got it together....YOU CAN DO THIS!
keep writing - you'll get tons of support here. i'm praying for you...
i DO NOT hate you - i have relapsed many times. if you go inpatient, you can ask what they will give you. i had buprenex where i went...not all give the same thing. some give clonodine and other stuff to treat your symptoms. most that i know of will give you something for the runs. like i said it is your right to ask what their method of treatment is. the length of stay is different everywhere, and it may also depend on how you are doing while you are there - ask that question too.
one of my main concerns would be your child. do you have someone you can trust to leave her/him with? Or, is your husband willing to try and be responsible for her/him while you are in the hospital? if you are worrying about your kid while doing this, it will make it all the more difficult. i am lucky to have my husband and some great family and friends to talk with. one of my friends (the one with the pot problem) even offered to help pay for my trip to fl to go to the clinic that eventually was the place that helped me the most. we didn't need the money, but the fact that he was willing was so incredible sweet...that in itself helped me just knowing he was that supportive.
i'm not going to be around much until tomorrow (sun) night. i would call (at the minimum) three inpatient places, and then make your decision about which one to pick. ask ALL your questions...it is your right to know.
let us know how you make out...i'm and praying for you.
one of my main concerns would be your child. do you have someone you can trust to leave her/him with? Or, is your husband willing to try and be responsible for her/him while you are in the hospital? if you are worrying about your kid while doing this, it will make it all the more difficult. i am lucky to have my husband and some great family and friends to talk with. one of my friends (the one with the pot problem) even offered to help pay for my trip to fl to go to the clinic that eventually was the place that helped me the most. we didn't need the money, but the fact that he was willing was so incredible sweet...that in itself helped me just knowing he was that supportive.
i'm not going to be around much until tomorrow (sun) night. i would call (at the minimum) three inpatient places, and then make your decision about which one to pick. ask ALL your questions...it is your right to know.
let us know how you make out...i'm and praying for you.
Hi,
Your words are beautiful and I thank you..but I already messed up. I failed. But I am going to call and find out about rehab. I have to be strong and I need to get out of here to do that. I know and understand what you said to me about me being the strong one and doing this for my child. But I can't stay here watching him(husband) freak out because he is running out. I would be ok if it he would just let this go...god why can't he let this go. You talk about rock bottom...well, I have hit my emotional rock bottom...not a physical one but I just am tired of it..does that count? I know he won't hit rock bottom until he has it taken away from him..I am scared for his work, our home, our way of life, God...He saw that I was so serious and it's like it makes him feel better or justified to have me there...I hate myself for not being strong. I am hoping you are not going to hate me..I really want to do this, that hasn't changed that only thing that has changed is, i have 34 pills in my drawer...yup that's right...I was wondering if someone might know about rehad stuff..what do I need to ask...I will call and talk to someone today..a bit nervous but figured I don't have any other choice at this point. The length of stay..ect??let me know if you can think of anything important....do they ussually do a taper? Will they give my imodium?? I will die without my imodium:) what goes on...scary when you have no idea...and I won't get in trouble for calling?? Right?? bring it on...
thank you again for everything and I am still here..I am still here.
Missy
Your words are beautiful and I thank you..but I already messed up. I failed. But I am going to call and find out about rehab. I have to be strong and I need to get out of here to do that. I know and understand what you said to me about me being the strong one and doing this for my child. But I can't stay here watching him(husband) freak out because he is running out. I would be ok if it he would just let this go...god why can't he let this go. You talk about rock bottom...well, I have hit my emotional rock bottom...not a physical one but I just am tired of it..does that count? I know he won't hit rock bottom until he has it taken away from him..I am scared for his work, our home, our way of life, God...He saw that I was so serious and it's like it makes him feel better or justified to have me there...I hate myself for not being strong. I am hoping you are not going to hate me..I really want to do this, that hasn't changed that only thing that has changed is, i have 34 pills in my drawer...yup that's right...I was wondering if someone might know about rehad stuff..what do I need to ask...I will call and talk to someone today..a bit nervous but figured I don't have any other choice at this point. The length of stay..ect??let me know if you can think of anything important....do they ussually do a taper? Will they give my imodium?? I will die without my imodium:) what goes on...scary when you have no idea...and I won't get in trouble for calling?? Right?? bring it on...
thank you again for everything and I am still here..I am still here.
Missy
you will not get in trouble for calling rehabs. you may eventually get in trouble if you keep going on like you are tho...
well you were right!! He got home and the first thing he started doing was calling for refills...I guess he's not on the same page. I am not that strong, god what am I going to do...??I have a young child and a husband that I love very much and I feel so stuck. I haven't done anything bad yet but I can't help hearing what you said over and over....I have to leave..Missy
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