alcoholic father

[tiki838]

my father is an alcoholic and he is messing up my family for his beer and he wont admit he is an alcoholic so i need some asvice on what i can do because me and my mom are clueless

[shortygrl]

i know how you feel... i'm quite sure that my dad is an alcholic too, and it's hard to tlk to them about it.  i don't know how many times my mom has tried to talk to him about it and he just brushes her off.  all i can say to you is try talking to him and be prepared to get ignored and for denial... but keep trying to tell him how you feel.  remember it's the desiese lashing out at you not ur father,
please feel free to message me whenever you feel the need to tlk to someone.
from someone that know's what your going through,
shortygrl

[omgitsmelody]

hey.. i saw your question.. and im extremely sorry for your situation.. my parents are both alcoholics.. im verry scared for them.. i love them so much and they are great parents.. but its not the same anymore... my relationship with them has changed... if you ever want to talk about it let me know... ok?

[ibizan]

hey u changed ur name!no more tiki?so sorry to hear about the divorce.....sad that ur dad has chosen the alcohol over family...is this what happened yes?u and ur mom desrve sanity...and peace.....it will not occur with what u described.u still going 2 Al-Ateen?and the counseling?

[bubbly838]

hey it has been along time since i have posted but alot of stuff has happend my parents are now getting divoreced sow as you can probably draw to the conclusion that is has not gotton any better

[ibizan]

sad that a grown man has to follow a younger one and do what u describe...he feels very small inside....alcohol shrinks folks brains!don't make it any easier but u keep hanging..ur mom needs u on her team!:)

[tiki838]

yea it felt alot different because most of my freinds say just stay away from him so he wont bother you but that is harder than it sound because sometimes he followes me and bothers the living daylights out of me

[ibizan]

yes tiki,thats how I felt when i attended AA and NA...i was in a room full of people who had the same problem i did.And they do know where ur coming from!

[tiki838]

yea at first i was like ok how is this going to be different from talking to my freinds but it is alot different i think because the people know where u are coming from

[ibizan]

so glad it was a good xperience for u and helped!keep going..u have unfortunately so much company out there of teens with a parent with an alcohol problem.

[tiki838]

yea it was the alateen meeting and my mom did not want to leave me there alone so she went to the alanon meeting down the hall.    

i am not allowed to talk about the meeting but i could post in a few weeks to like tell people about how it helped me and it could probably help them if they tried it but i should probably go to a few more before i do that

[working dog]

good for you tiki......can you post about the meeting ? i would like to know in case i can use the info to help somebody sometime.....billy

[ibizan]

oh cool was that the Al-Ateen?

[tiki838]

you are both right but guess what I WENT TO MY FIRST MEETING TODAY and i really liked it

[working dog]

i want you to know that lots of folks out there care about what your going through..ibizan does a great job with this stuff so i don't have much to add..and like she said denial is a drag..its tough to understand how people we care about that drink become so stubborn..good luck with everything...billy

[ibizan]

whew u hit a nerve there!Don't let his denial deter u and ur mom.....u go to the appt!I know u will!:)

[tiki838]

yea i just told my dad about the meeting like two seconds ago and he glared at me and said thats a waist of !@#$ money and i was like you dont have to pay for it and he just rolled his eyes it is like he wants us to act like there is nothing wrong and that is not going to happen

[ibizan]

please do..look 4ward to hearing about how it went!:))

[tiki838]

again thanks and i will definentaly post again when i go to my first meeting so you will know how it went

[ibizan]

in ur county of residence u should have an outpatient substance abuse agency.They get state funding to offset the cost of services.The addictions counselors are licensed by the state...i would suggest u try this route!show this 2 ur mom please!:)

[ibizan]

try finding a counselor u can click with locally....and the both of u go!please keep us posted!:)and ur welcome...theres a lotta support and good words here for the taking!

[tiki838]

well i just showed my mom this sight and all of the post i made and she told me that she new about al-ateen but she thought i would not want to do it because we tryed going to a counsler but i did not like it so i stoped but she said if i wanted to try it i can but i have to find one here localy          

SO THANKS FOR THE ADVICE YOU MIGHT HAVE REALLY HELPED ME ALOT

[ibizan]

ur poor mom.....she needs a good lawyer.....but to get 2 al-Anon,counseling and try al-ateen for u is a must!U will find so many others who have gone thru or r going thru what u r!They can give u good feedback!

[tiki838]

yea you are probably right because my mom is trying every thing she can think of to get him out of the house but he wont leave and she can not affored a lawer right now

[ibizan]

there my also be Al-A-Teen in ur area....nothing to lose by checking it out...and the counseling can only help!