Aggressive cat

[larandsandy]

Hi, my 3 year old female cat has been aggressive ever since we got her as a 6 week old kitten.  We worked with her a lot and now she is ok with everyone in my family except my husband.  She came from a bad situation.  She was in a home with one male member who was wheel-chair bound and couldn't care for the kittens.  I doubt it if he socialized with the kittens at all.  They had two rooms to roam in which were not sanitary and food was thrown on the floor.  So, I knew I would have a challenge  but I was up for it to save the kitten.  She has made wonderful improvement, except where my husband is concerned.  He really tries to warm up to her, but she will bite him in the face if he tries to pick her up.  She will let him pet her, but that is about it.  He has never been aggressive with her, so why is she doing this?  Is it because of her kitten situation?  Any suggestions on how to get her to trust him?  Thanks for your comments.

[Aleda M Cheng, D.V.M., C.V.A]

Try getting some Feliway brand feline pheromone and sprinkling it on your husbands clothes.  Feliway gives cats a feeling of calmness and well being.  Place your cat gently on your husbands lap (when he has some Feliway on) with a small plate of delicious food.  She will probably jump off the first day, but hopefully the intervals will increase.  The first couple of times your husband should not touch your cat.  After 4 days or more your husband can gently touch her head while she is eating.  This should be performed when she is hungry!  When this becomes automatic you can start with having your husband pick her up, also with the Feliway on.  The first time he should just put his hands on her in the picking up position than release her.  He could also hold a plate of delicious food for her when he touchs her.  Each time it should be performed with more contact time until he picks her up and puts her on his lap.  Your husband should have a plate of food on his lap for when she gets there.  If this doesn't help please post again and I will give furthur suggestions.  If nothing seems to work you may have to use Clomicalm or Shen Calmer or  prozac or other medication, or holistic calming supplements temporarily.

[kyes]

"utah"'s idea is a good one--food is the universal language!  Does your husband try to pick the cat up?  If so he might want to stick to petting (and feeding) the animal for a while until attitudes shift.  Cats can take a long time to get adjusted to change, especially if they associate something with trauma--and because they're so little it's easy to kind of scoop them up into situations they resent.  Our six-year-old cat, who we raised from a superaffectionate 4-week-old morsel unafraid of everything but the vacuum cleaner, is only now adjusting himself to being picked up.  He just didn't like it.  He still doesn't but tolerates it.  He's not much of a lapcat, either, though he's a monster for affection.  If your cat has similar tendencies and trauma on top, she could take years to work through it and will just need patience and a respectful observation of her limits with various family members.  However, it is likely that she will respond in time.

If the kitty likes your husband to pet her and tolerates affection while eating, your husband might try petting her while she eats.  I had a cat who was reluctant to eat, so I crooned to him and petted him as he ate and he loved it!  Of course he ended up being a rather strange cat....Good luck!

[utahmomma]

Have you tried having him feed her exclusively?  If the cat can associate a good outcome (food) with a person (your husband) it might change everything.  Kind of Pavlov's theory but with cats.  :-)