feel i should be off meds

[hell1971]

Had a major episode, mania then rapid cycling mixed state last year and since then my doctor has been trying to get me stable. First I was put on epilim and then lithium was added, then came off lithium and had olazapine added, then had the latest drug added in the hope that it could replace the epilim and the olanzapine but had an ellergic reaction so have had to come off that now so I am left on epilim and olanzapine which is not working, sure I have settled a little and things are not as bad as last year but I am still having several mood swings a day and the depression is the most prominant. I have had enough and want to come off all the meds and see how things go. I know my doc will fight me on this and will persuade me to try something else, what can I do I feel so helpless.

[heyjude1]

Oh girl!  I would really discuss this with my doctor, it doesn't sound like a good idea to me.  I agree with eplo.  They may not be the exact meds you need but they are probably helping some to keep you together.  Sometimes just twicking the dosage or adding a med can make all the difference in the world.
I  understand what you are saying about all the meds but it just takes time to reach the correct "cocktail" for you.  There are so many good anitphycotics and mood stablizers out there that you haven't tried.  Perhaps it would help to see another p-doc for additional opinion.  I would listen to the experts.  
I was told 25 yrs. ago that I would have to stay on meds the rest of my life to cope and I have  proven that to myself over and over.  This disease does not go away by itself..there is no  cure and it can progress'.  Please be very careful.

[ryleighgirl]

I am BP 1 Geodone is the best......

[paranoid_cataclysm]

Keep trying medications if you haven't tried them all already and educate yourself on your available options like ILADVOCATE suggested.  I am sort of at the same point right now where I hallucinate, among other things, and end up confusing other people even though I am on medication but I'm not giving up, mind you I would more frequently if I wasn't on medication.  Sometimes I want to quit as well but you can't give up.  Try to remember "not fully working" that you said is key here, without them you might have an even harder time.

[eplo]

If you feel that you can go on without the meds, it is because they are working...  we so easily forget how bad we were before the meds.  I did that once, and I even stop going to the doctor and quite cold turkey my meds (back then i was diagnose depressive) I felt great, really really manic-way kinda great and i crashed.  Good thing I have excellent friends to take me back to the doctor.  The whole without meds lasted about 5 months, and after I had about a year before being back to ok.  My doctor told me that this is the surest way to become resistant to the meds.  

[hell1971]

But if they are not fully working whats the point, how do I know I want be just the same without them.

[ryleighgirl]

STAY ON THE MEDS!!!!!!!

[hell1971]

I just feel I would be better off without meds, no constant reminder that I have BP maybe then I can just carry on like normal.

[ILADVOCATE]

Its best to educate yourself about available options as regards treatment and discuss what might help you with your psychiatrist. I did reach several points in my life where it appeared nothing could help me but as I found out more and discussed it with my psychiatrist I was able to find out more and recieve better treatment.