19 month old Tantrum

[fireboy]

I have a 19 month old child who has temper tantrums. He gets upset if he doesn't get his way and will throw himself on the floor and kick his feet and scream to the top of his lungs. I've tried putting him in his bed. That makes him even more upset. He throws his pillow and blanket on the floor and jumps up and down in his bed and throws himself down and kicks and screams some more. I wait until he calms down, no matter how long it takes. After he calms down I tell him that type of behavior will not be tolorated. When he gets out of his room 5 mins. later he's back at it again. WHAT SHALL I DO????

[lolagee]

I have a 20 month old son that is full of fire.  When he does not get his way, he bites me, slaps me in the face, pinches me etc...He is doing this to his father and grandmother also.  Recently he did it at day care and I had to face another parent about her son and the teeth marks my son left on his arm because he could not have the toy the other boy had.  I called mis doctor and asked for some direction.  My son is a happy boy, ususally no problems and very smart.  His doctor told me that my son is trying to gain control of the situation and that is why he is doing this, He is finding what makes me react and is pushing that.  He at that moment is in control while I am out of control.  His doctor said be consistant and for biting and hitting there is no warning just pick him up, hold him in a bear hug for a minute and tell him why he is being held for a time out over and over again.  He said to hold him like a bear hug because having control of mis movement will let him know that I am still in control.  Also for temper tantrums, my doctor said let him do it and do not show any emotion about it.  If he is banging his head on the floor, let him, just step over him, he will see that there was no response by you and eventually give up.  He is looking for reaction and control.  Maybe you should contact your childs doctor and inquire about this problem.  They have heard it all before.  

[Jram]

Whatever you choose to do, the most important thing is to be consistant with your punishments.  You know your son best-- does he like playing with certain toys or does he prefer television and videos more?  You can choose to take away things he likes because of his poor behavior, but just be consistant.  You could confuse him, which may result in him acting out more, if you change your punishment style too often.  Maybe leaving him alone in his crib for 'quiet time' will work, and 5 minutes later when he's having a tantrum, just put him back in his crib and explain that he can't leave until he shows you that he can behave properly.

Good luck, I know its frustrating :(