4 Year Old Son Refuses to Poop

[Hunters_mommy29]

I read some of the other questions, but think this is a little different.
After an incident at daycare that is still unclear, my son now refuses to poop after being fully potty trained for about 6 months.  We know that he went in his pants and some comments were made such as "That's icky.  That's gross."  He will let a little slip and then hold off--causing him to need multiple underwear changes throughout the day.  He has now started going in his sleep.  I have watched him and he is truly unconcsious while pooping.  He doesn't even wake up when his pants get changed.  To make matters worse, he is also refusing to eat anything but bread and butter, apple juice and milk.  We have tried suppositories, laxatives, bribery, and nothing seems to be working.  Please help.  He is not the same child.  All of his energy is spent on holding in his bowel movements, so he refuses to play.  He only takes part in sedentary activities so he can control himself.  When I ask him why he won't go, he has told me everything to that his tummy hurts to he is scared.
We have been encouraging him and asking him every day if "today is the day?".  He always says yes.  Lately, he has begun ignoring us any time we bring it up.  I have not made a big deal out of him going in his sleep.  I am just happy that he is going at all at this point.  What can we do to help get him back on track?  Thank you!!!

[GrantsMom]

My son is three, almost four (in Jan) and was potty trained over the summer.  He has always had "potty issues" since he was two and we introduced the potty.  When he was two, we didn't make a big deal of it, but he started holding it...mainly I think because he was not ready and putting soo much pressure on himself to poop on the potty when he just simply wasn't ready to do so.  He got into a holding it pattern and we had to give him an enema after five days of holding it.  He fought us physically with this but we had no choice!  After the first enema, he still continued to hold it for a couple hours. So, we gave him another...until he finally pooped (ALOT) It had to have hurt as it was really large.  Since then, we backed off and started giving him Myralax, which has helped with the holding a bit.  He still tries to hold it for a day or two, but by the third day, he usually goes ahead and poops in his pull up.  Finally, over the summer he was totally trained, pooping and peeing in the potty normally.  He got set back after a death in our extended family, which the only way he was affected was that I was completely busy with trying to help my family with arrangements, etc. and I wasn't around that week to keep him on schedule.  Since then, he's back to his old ways.  He refuses to go on the potty and raises a huge fit when I ask him to go sit on the potty when he seems to have to go....HELP!  I feel like it's never going to happen and I just don't know what else to do....

[Lori5]

To Koom -
I would definatly talk to the mother regarding this issue.  You see by all of our postings that until we find this website, we all feel alone and very frustrated.  If you let her know that there is a name for this and that she isn't alone, she may be able to cope a bit better and my read some ideas that could be helpful in these postings.

[dad999]

We have a 4 year old son who is holding it in and won

[koom]

I forgot to mention that I heard through the 'grapevine' that dad this too when he was little and outgrew it when he was almost in his teens!

[koom]

I'm an educator in a daycare.  I work with the preschool (4 and 5) year olds.  I am stumped with one of the children in my group.  He will soil his pants anywhere from once to three times a day.  When he soils his pants at school, mom is called to change him.  Everyday he comes in from school smelling and the other children say he "stinks" and do not want to play with him.  I encourage him to wipe himself and offer wipes to get the smell off of him however, he will still have more 'accidents'.  I asked him if he knows he's pooping and sometimes he say's no and other times he say's he doesn't know.  I've seen him sit, playing with a toy and suddenly he smells.  I've tried not making a big deal of it to offering stickers for jobs well done (using the potty).  At times he gets so frustrated and cry's but when I encourage him to clean himself up, he complains he hates to bend down (to take off his shoes), to why am I alway's checking him.  I know his self esteem is affected and that's what I didn't want him to have to go through.  Mom is aware obviously and I think she is frustrated but how do I deal with this problem?
Help!

[Lori5]

I read that honey is a natural laxative and was wondering if anyone has tried that.  I don't know if it's enough to do the job but I feel much better giving my child something natural...let me know of anyone has had success with it.