4 Year Old Son Refuses to Poop

[Hunters_mommy29]

I read some of the other questions, but think this is a little different.
After an incident at daycare that is still unclear, my son now refuses to poop after being fully potty trained for about 6 months.  We know that he went in his pants and some comments were made such as "That's icky.  That's gross."  He will let a little slip and then hold off--causing him to need multiple underwear changes throughout the day.  He has now started going in his sleep.  I have watched him and he is truly unconcsious while pooping.  He doesn't even wake up when his pants get changed.  To make matters worse, he is also refusing to eat anything but bread and butter, apple juice and milk.  We have tried suppositories, laxatives, bribery, and nothing seems to be working.  Please help.  He is not the same child.  All of his energy is spent on holding in his bowel movements, so he refuses to play.  He only takes part in sedentary activities so he can control himself.  When I ask him why he won't go, he has told me everything to that his tummy hurts to he is scared.
We have been encouraging him and asking him every day if "today is the day?".  He always says yes.  Lately, he has begun ignoring us any time we bring it up.  I have not made a big deal out of him going in his sleep.  I am just happy that he is going at all at this point.  What can we do to help get him back on track?  Thank you!!!

[Lori5]

Please tell me what I am doing wrong!   I followed alot of your advice and am still having problems.   I have a 4 year old son who I had problems potty training - same thing, peed great, wouldn't poop.  After about 8 months of this, we finally succeeded.   He was fully potty trained for about 3 or 4 months w/o incident.   When he switched rooms at daycare (moved up to the next level) and started soccer instead of swimming, he started holding it again.  He has been doing this since mid September.  It was so bad that I took him to the ER on Sunday and ended up giving him a supistory when we got home - which produced one of those colossial poops that we all talk about.  On Tuesday, after reading all of your comments, I gave him an anema which produced yet another colossial poo.   So yesterday, again another anema just to makes sure everything was all cleaned out - which produced a normal sized poop - but staining of the underwear for the rest of the day.

I have also been giving him the Oil every night in his drink at dinnertime.   Even with the laxitive - he just holds it more - more times a day and spends more time concentrating on holding it.  Yesterday he called me a 'bad woman for giving him that medicine'.  It was just awful....I'm at my whit's end with all of this - HELP!

[Hailey'smom]

My 4 yr. old daughter has had this problem since she was only 9 months old. I have tried everything all the other parents here have tried...meds., children's hosptal, diet. She has no accidents but if I wouldn't give her Babylax every 2 days she would never poop. I really feel like I may go crazy with this. I have always been a stay at home Mom, I have no other children, my life is consumed my poop!!I will welcome any advice or new treatments: ***@****

[Lori5]

I am so glad to hear that I am not the only one with this problem!  My son is 4 years old and after 6 months of being potty trained, he started 'holding it'.  This has been going on and off for about 3 months, I have made several calls to the doctor who just kept telling me to use a laxative and/or supository - which I did but still would have the same problem the next day.  Then of course with the staining of the underwear etc, etc, etc.  I ended up taking my son to the hospital yesterday AM because he hadn't had a BM in a week.   They just took x-rays and sent me home telling me that it was a common problem and to give him more fiber.  I ended up giving him a supository which produced a BM the size of a soda can (no exageration there).   I know that I've put too much pressure on him to use the potty, but it's so frustrating.

After trying bribery, sticker charts, incentive toys, ignoring the problem, even trying to get him to poop in a pull-up (nothing has worked)  I have a new idea. I have come to the conclusion that the bathroom is just not a fun place to be right now.  So I have ordered a hand held game for him to play ONLY while he's sitting on the potty.   I don't know if it will work - but it seems like a good idea.   I'll let you know how it goes.

[koppadopa]

i am new to this forum and found it out of god awful depseration. it is nice to see i am not alone in this issue of the poop problems. i got on line just a few minutes ago after holding my daughter for 1 hour while she strained to release a softball sized bowel movement. this all started 5 months ago, when we had to take her out of the daycare she was in. when we found out she got in trouble for peeing on herself and was sat in the corner for over 2 hours in her wet panties and skirt. within a day or two she went from being fully potty trained to wanting a diaper or pull ups and always having accidents, and then came the poop problems, she started going 5-8 days without going and then when she would go it was be excrutiatingly painful and take a while to work out of her. we went to the doctor and they put her on miralax, i noticed a comment from another parent on here mentioning fatigue due to miralax. i noticed this too but she never had a solid bm for over 2 months, she had constant diahrea, and that never changed even with the change of the dosages and everything. i finally got fed up with her pedetrician suggesting every time i called about this, that it would take several months to get her back to normal. i took her to texas childrens hospital and they did exams and xrays and blood work all came back normal. i have an appointment wed, with the gastrenologist but i know she  is holding it and that is causing the problems, but i guess what confuses me, if our bowels are shaped a certain way and i was wondering if anyone had any insight on why my daughters are round and not long shaped like a normal bowel movement. why and how would they get this way in the bowel tract, since the bowels are not shaped like softballs, and i am not exagerating.
i do think it very well may be psychological due to something that i am unaware of at the daycare she used to be in. but i am worried that this is something more, like i am hoping she wasn;t abused or something but i have no way of finding out, she is 3 and 1/2 and it's been so long ago we moved her that i am thinking if the gi doctor can't find anything i am hoping a psycholigist might help.
any comments would be nice.

[molly's mom]

I noticed that some moms mentioned buying fruit juice with extra fiber in it.  I've been to the grocery store and Whole Foods and can't find it.  Is it in a special section in the store that I missed?  I can't seem to find it anywhere.  Thanks!

[D99G03]

Miralax worked like a charm for us too!!