6 Year old boy afraid of failure

[amandachalynn]

My son is a great kid. Smart, funny, caring and gentle with his baby sister. However, he has one huge fear that gets in his way. He is afraid to fail. If he thinks he's not doing something right or he might mess it up, he doesn't want to do it. He refuses to pour a bowl of cereal, because he might spill. He refuses to ride a bike because he might fall. He wanted to drop out of soccer because he made a bad play, etc. He's been avoiding many things lately because of his fear to make a mistake, and it's getting worse as he gets older. I am a stay at home mom, so he doesn't have an authority figure who points our his mistakes or insists on perfection, so I'm not sure where it comes from, and I"m not sure how to help him.

[allmymarbles]

He is partly a victim of American thinking, that you have to be the best at whatever you do. It seems we are not allowed to do any thing just for fun. One of my daughters was a very fine swimmer. The school selected her to train competitively. I went to one of the sessions and it seemed to me that the kids were working rather than enjoying, and the parents wee obnoxiously aggressive. So I spoke to my daughter as to how she felt about swimming and she happily gave up the training.

I think you son is getting this from school. Of course his personality is such that he is more affected than others might be. You have to explain to him what is wrong with the notion of being best in everything and teach him how to have fun.

[margypops]

one other question who taught him to ride his bike ?

[margypops]

I was going to ask if anyone is pointing out mistakes a lot ,any family around may get on his case , what about school, how does he get on there,what are his teachers like ?  You say you are a stay at home mom is his Dad in the picture at all ?